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[Top Gear Theme]

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[JEREMY] Tonight, James May faces trial by water,

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James annoys a dog,

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And James says "ow, ow, ow, ow ow"

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As the loser of the previous challenge,

0:00:49.568,0:00:52.070
we decided to give James another chance.

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After breaking his legs, of course.

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[JAMES] Oh, cock.

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First order of business is to figure out how to move.

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Forward was easy enough, as attacking moves you forward.

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Turning around however -

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Why the bloody hell won't it turn round?

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Fortunately, the hunter starts with a bow, [br]which can be used to aim and -

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Hang on, did -

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[Crickets chirping]

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[RICHARD] It's all over, mate

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[JAMES] Oh, cock.

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Still, we can choose the binoculars [br]as our starting gift.

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It is so unbelievably slow,

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but you do start with it from the get go.

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Now for some basic tricks.

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You can use backsteps instead [br]for faster movement,

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and use the lock on to turn [br]around in a pinch.

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Contrary to popular belief,

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backsteps DO have i-frames.

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Problem is, it's only four frames.

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The more important aspect is

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the near infinite poise you get during [br]the starting frames.

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After that, we can finally pick up our [br]starting gear.

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An upgrade, for sure,

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but it wasn't going to make our lives [br]easier any time soon.

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"Ow!"

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"[Bleep] thing"

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And without any ranged options,

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"Ow!"

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even a simple bow hollow proved to be [br]a challenge.

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"Ow!"

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At least we can get the jump on this guy.

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Should be easy enough!

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As it turned out, attacks that knock you [br]backwards,

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and not being able to move forward,

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didn't mix too well!

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Oh, cock.

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There's no real point in trying to dodge [br]with backsteps.

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It won't be precise enough to [br]dodge anything,

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and you'll still have to close [br]back the distance.

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The most pressing matter is, [br]of course, mobility,

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or lack thereof.

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So before heading out, [br]we make sure to pick up

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all the items, including the [br]homeward bones.

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Regular hollows are hard enough.

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So our only real choice is up to the burg.

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After reaching the burg and picking up a [br]nearby shield,

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we head down to the Undead Merchant.

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"hehehehe"

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First order of business is to buy a [br]shortbow for the significantly faster aim.

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After that, we stock up on arrows, [br]and buy around 30 firebombs.

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The damage is - well, not the best -

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but at least it can fire from a [br]safe distance.

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Before heading up to the Taurus Demon,

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we stop by a stack of barrels.

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"Holy mother! Did you see that!"

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After crossing the fog gate -

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"Ow!"

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taking care of the archers, [br]we meet with the Taurus Demon.

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Our only defense is backsteps,

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so we need to kill the Taurus Demon

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before the bridge runs out.

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Arrows are too slow for this,

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so use the fire bombs from earlier.

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Now that we have a nice amount in the bank

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we can start thinking about weapons.

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But before that, we need to reach Andre.

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To that end, we head up to the [br]Undead Parish.

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"Hahahahahaha!"

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Trick here is to bait the fire from a [br]relatively safe location.

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"Ow!"

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In this location, the fire only hits once,

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and after that intial blast,

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we can safely head down the bridge.

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"Oh crikey, it's the rozzers."

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Under the bridge, we meet up with [br]the dragon

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or at least, the rear end of it.

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Well, I'm already holding a bow,

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so it would be a damn shame to not [br]take advantage of it.

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With a couple dozen arrows and [br]some patience,

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we can cut down the tail for a decent [br]early game weapon.

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"Heheheheyyy, look at that!"

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The rats can be a bit of a [br]pain in the arse,

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because the last thing you want is [br]getting poisoned.

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Never mind, could be worse.

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"Hang on did-"

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and, then it was.

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Oh, cock.

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"Hahahaha!" "Oh shut up!"

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99 firebombs, because this is going to [br]be a long journey.

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Should be the last time we buy firebombs.

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You may think spending THIS much on [br]firebombs is wasteful.

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But we can get back a lot of souls

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with item pickups.

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After reaching the New Londo Ruins,

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we head up, use the master key

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and enter... The Valley of Drakes.

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As the name suggests, the place is [br]crawling with, well, drakes.

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This one in particular, however, [br]can't move.

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There is also a ledge, and we [br]happen to have 99 firebombs.

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You can see where this is going.

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After the dragon, we can get a [br]healthy amount of souls,

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a shield, and a sword.

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That was against a stationary enemy

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the other drakes won't be that easy.

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Unless, of course, they get[br]stuck in the terrain.

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Easy enough!

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But the next one, not so much.

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Cock.

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Unless, of course, you use the [br]bow to distract

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which increases the amount they [br]need to turn before attacking.

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Now, there was only one [br]obstacle remaining.

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Cock.

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Cheese!

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Not the best weapon in the world,

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but it does its job.

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After that it was a quick [br]trip up to Andre.

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We can get the Grass Crest Shield,

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and a longbow for longer range.

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"Watch this! Oh, hang on, hang on,"

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After quitting out, we get the jump on the [br]crystal lizard for some Twinkling Titanites

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We're almost to the Undead Parish,

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only thing remaning is the[br]Darkroot Garden,

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which should be - "Ow ow ow ow!"

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Quit out if you get grabbed,

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and use firebombs.

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This was a present from [br]Snoop Dogg a few years ago

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when I made an album with him.

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It actually makes the noise "bling" [br]when you hold it up to the camera.

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Look, it goes "bling"!

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I'll just give this a little -

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It's the first weapon we ever saw!

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It's light enough to use while staying [br]below 25% equip load.

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It's easy to get with the master key,

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and its upgraded with twinkling titanites.

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It's the perfect one handed weapon,

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and it's called the Astora Straight Sword.

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"Hahahahaha!"

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I'm never financially recovering from [br]those wasted Twinkling Titanites.

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Never mind. Could be worse.

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Oh, cock.

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"Ah, hello there. I have your reward."

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He's quite a sweet fellow, really.

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I think I'll call him Bob.

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"Let's not be greedy, now."

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Moments later, Bob is dismembered.

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Normally, I would wait for Anor Londo,

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but we need the health, stamina, [br]and endurance right now.

0:10:08.476,0:10:10.459
We head down and down,

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past the New Londo Ruins

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past the Valley of Drakes,

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and into Blighttown.

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Now we don't exactly have the damage [br]to deal with these,

0:10:19.942,0:10:23.200
but we can use the [br]extra health from the ring,

0:10:23.200,0:10:25.712
plus the near infinite poise -

0:10:29.274,0:10:35.428
After that humiliating defeat, [br]I once again turned to my old addiction.

0:10:35.428,0:10:39.248
You may be thinking I'm going to [br]Blighttown with these firebombs,

0:10:39.248,0:10:42.528
but what I'm instead going to do is this.

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"Ow!"

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Oh, cock.

0:11:24.941,0:11:27.533
The shortcut lever to New Londo,

0:11:27.533,0:11:29.303
as well as our choice of weapon,

0:11:29.303,0:11:31.757
was unfortunately behind a key.

0:11:31.757,0:11:34.507
That's where the bow and arrow comes in.

0:11:37.349,0:11:40.369
After picking up a green shard [br]along the way -

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Should come in handy later -

0:11:42.249,0:11:46.249
we go down, past the lever room, for [br]our weapon of choice.

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Why not use the short or the long bow?

0:11:49.310,0:11:53.230
Well, it's because the composite bow has [br]the highest damage by far

0:11:53.230,0:11:55.750
After unlocking the shortcut for later,

0:11:55.750,0:11:58.400
we warp back to Andre.

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With headshots, we can now deal with [br]most enemies from a safe distance.

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Without breaking the bank.

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This should come in handy, [br]for the barbarians on the entrance

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as well as Quelaag.

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Cock.

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The trick here is to lure in one by one

0:12:37.297,0:12:40.561
and use the drake sword's two handed move

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"Ow!"

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The actual trick here is to use repeated [br]headshots to stunlock it.

0:12:48.340,0:12:50.930
Since there were a lot of ladders,

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resting at a bonfire was not an option.

0:12:53.621,0:12:56.622
Unless you want to be stuck here forever [br]with Quelaag.

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In which case, uh, based.

0:12:58.152,0:13:01.172
Unfortunately, the poison swamp [br]and mosquitoes

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were not making things easy.

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Having an upgraded bow helps,

0:13:05.630,0:13:09.630
and it's good practice since we'll be[br]manually aiming a lot.

0:13:10.495,0:13:13.382
Speaking of, Quelaag can be stunned,

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similar to how we stunlocked the barbarians[br]by aiming for the human portion.

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"Watch this! Oh, hang on, hang on."

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"What on earth..."

0:13:26.977,0:13:28.657
That didn't work.

0:13:28.657,0:13:31.557
But just to be sure, let's see it again [br]from several angles.

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"What, I've got to get out?

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Where the hell do you think I'm [br]going to go? Ah, no!"

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And the great question that we are [br]addressing on this occasion is

0:14:05.434,0:14:11.164
Cheese versus Cheese.

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We can use the accessibility ramp [br]placed in front of Miyazaki-san's

0:14:21.263,0:14:23.593
Quelaag Observation Deck.

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With the bell rung, we can head [br]on to Sen's Fortress,

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and make the long journey [br]up to Anor Londo.

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Oh, cock.

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We can't kill the gargoyles and ring the bell [br]to open the gate.

0:15:13.991,0:15:16.941
So this leaves us with only one choice.

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In this state, you cannot use your [br]bow to aim.

0:15:37.755,0:15:42.725
However, pressing aim will turn you in a [br]seemingly random direction.

0:15:45.327,0:15:50.997
Think it has something to do with the[br]initial location where the deathcam was triggered.

0:15:53.355,0:15:56.907
Use trial and error until you get[br]the right angle,

0:15:56.907,0:16:01.177
and punch to move forward, or backstep [br]to move backwards.

0:16:06.850,0:16:10.850
Thankfully, we can stop by the bonfire,[br]kindle, if you haven't already,

0:16:10.850,0:16:14.190
because this is going to be a [br]one way trip.

0:16:26.249,0:16:31.900
Once we enter Sen's Fortress, we can now[br]quit out to disable the deathcam.

0:16:31.691,0:16:36.681
We are now locked in. There will be no escape[br]until we beat Anor Londo,

0:16:36.681,0:16:39.410
and recieve the Lordvessel.

0:16:43.728,0:16:49.980
To no one's surprise, we were ill-equipped[br]to face the challenges of Sen's Fortress.

0:17:01.656,0:17:03.855
One thing we can improve easily,

0:17:03.855,0:17:06.172
is the number of Estus Flasks.

0:17:06.795,0:17:07.605
Cock.

0:17:07.605,0:17:11.605
The Astora Straight Sword prevents [br]skeletons from reassembling.

0:17:11.605,0:17:14.481
Now this would have been a helpful effect,

0:17:14.481,0:17:18.481
if not for the fact that we can use [br]our bow to kill the necromancers.

0:17:19.410,0:17:22.501
Once we skip the entire map using a [br]quick shortcut.

0:17:23.631,0:17:26.991
We can jump down and summon up [br]Paladin Leeroy

0:17:27.717,0:17:28.547
"Hi!"

0:17:28.547,0:17:32.547
After picking up the Cleric set, we head[br]down to Pinwheel.

0:17:33.650,0:17:35.360
"Ow ow ow ow ow!"

0:17:36.162,0:17:38.829
Leeroy can deal the bulk of the damage,

0:17:38.829,0:17:41.799
while we sort out the clones [br]using our bow.

0:17:41.799,0:17:44.701
Or at least, that was the original plan.

0:17:44.701,0:17:46.461
[Dial Up Internet sound]

0:17:46.461,0:17:48.351
"Oh for god's sake!"

0:17:50.711,0:17:54.711
"Oh god in Heaven [BLEEP] you heap of dog [BLEEP]"

0:18:07.789,0:18:10.969
For the next step of our plan, [br]we need a ring.

0:18:10.969,0:18:14.969
Any ring works, except for the [br]ring of favor and protection.

0:18:14.969,0:18:16.749
Now, back to Andre.

0:18:16.749,0:18:23.139
We use our mouse to hover over the arrow, [br]click the arrow and press buy at the same time.

0:18:23.139,0:18:26.599
Press once more to get the insufficent soul message.

0:18:27.774,0:18:30.156
After that, open up the system menu.

0:18:30.156,0:18:34.156
Hold right click, select quit game, [br]and let go.

0:18:34.156,0:18:35.616
After the message pops up,

0:18:35.616,0:18:39.248
Select any item and drop -998.

0:18:43.709,0:18:46.883
This works for pretty much any item [br]that can be stacked,

0:18:46.883,0:18:50.883
but having a few thousand long swords [br]can cause some issues

0:18:54.836,0:18:57.351
Which of course, we can exploit.

0:18:57.351,0:18:59.811
Remember that Cleric's set we [br]picked up earlier.

0:18:59.811,0:19:01.901
Upgrade the hat to +5

0:19:02.698,0:19:04.937
Equip and unequip the hat,

0:19:04.937,0:19:10.670
Pop a humanity, and during the animation[br]press the second weapon slot.

0:19:10.670,0:19:12.806
After that, try to unequip the ring.

0:19:13.627,0:19:16.300
Finally, equip the priest's hat.

0:19:18.635,0:19:23.315
We have now spawned a fully upgraded[br]Black Knight Sword from thin air.

0:19:27.752,0:19:31.752
"This is like being a [BLEEP] [br]hippopotamus."

0:19:53.165,0:19:57.165
The damage is superb, but it [br]is a bit on the slower side

0:19:57.165,0:19:59.305
and the range isn't great either.

0:19:59.830,0:20:01.880
To solve some of these issues,

0:20:01.880,0:20:04.310
we head to the Darkroot Garden.

0:20:04.673,0:20:06.983
The forest guardians can be a pain.

0:20:06.983,0:20:11.953
Melee ones are fine, but this filthy mage[br]tends to roll back and spam spells,

0:20:11.953,0:20:14.593
and we don't exactly have the best [br]forward movement.

0:20:14.593,0:20:16.779
Thankfully, we have this.

0:20:17.175,0:20:20.456
Once we reach the cat, we can join up[br]to make them friendly.

0:20:20.456,0:20:24.456
After the cat, we can go behind the building[br]for the stone armour.

0:20:25.954,0:20:29.954
"Oh, hang on, hang on. What on earth..."

0:20:30.778,0:20:34.417
This is because of these three thousand [br]weight swords,

0:20:34.417,0:20:38.887
so make sure to drop these after you do[br]the whole cleric hat shenanigans.

0:20:38.887,0:20:44.557
Armour and poise does help! But there [br]was one more thing to pick up before we leave.

0:20:44.557,0:20:46.947
"Do you speak English?" "Yep."

0:20:47.137,0:20:48.947
"Do you know where there's any beer?"

0:20:48.947,0:20:50.607
"I dunno mate, I'm just a mascot."

0:21:04.459,0:21:07.709
Ah, it's actually a frame slower than [br]regular backsteps,

0:21:07.709,0:21:10.812
but the flip has actually usable i-frames.

0:21:22.458,0:21:25.677
With our new-found movement option, [br]we flip ahead.

0:21:25.677,0:21:27.973
Down to Quelaag's domain.

0:21:28.366,0:21:32.100
Buying 99 firebombs is only going to take[br]us so far.

0:21:32.100,0:21:34.791
One good alternative is pyromancies.

0:21:35.923,0:21:39.923
Now normally, you would save Laurentius [br]down in the depths to get the pyro flame,

0:21:39.923,0:21:42.153
but there is another way.

0:21:43.769,0:21:45.619
Once you start scratching your head,

0:21:45.619,0:21:47.719
head back to the hidden bonfire.

0:21:51.667,0:21:53.933
"I've no use for it any longer."

0:21:53.933,0:21:57.535
But more importantly, a free pyro flame.

0:21:59.591,0:22:01.631
We can upgrade it on the same spot,

0:22:03.321,0:22:06.791
and after removing the egg, we visit[br]Quelana for more.

0:22:07.263,0:22:12.573
One important thing is to make sure to [br]ascend only once and not any more.

0:22:14.871,0:22:18.401
Since we are here, might as well pick up [br]the armour.

0:22:22.512,0:22:26.722
We can use flips to i-frame through all[br]the attacks, and make it fall off

0:22:26.722,0:22:29.540
near the fog gate for an easy kill.

0:22:29.540,0:22:33.344
Now you might be thinking it's high time we[br]bail, and buy some pyromancies.

0:22:33.344,0:22:36.514
What I'm instead going to do, is this.

0:23:01.882,0:23:04.912
After that, we can claim our prize.

0:23:04.912,0:23:08.912
Remember, we haven't sat on any bonfires,[br]so failure is not an option.

0:23:20.671,0:23:23.192
We don't have the upgrade [br]materials just yet,

0:23:23.192,0:23:25.892
but what we can do is go [br]back to the asylum.

0:23:26.985,0:23:29.805
"Bit too close to the edge there! Um...

0:23:30.209,0:23:34.479
I've got to be careful how I move, otherwise...[br]I'll fall into the valley."

0:23:34.924,0:23:39.654
Movement is affected by FPS. So the 60 FPS[br]patch from DSFix

0:23:39.654,0:23:42.194
needs to be temporarily disabled.

0:23:42.194,0:23:44.294
The rest is going up to the nest.

0:23:44.294,0:23:45.594
Should be easy enough.

0:23:46.197,0:23:47.567
"Jeez!"

0:23:49.825,0:23:50.675
"Ow!"

0:23:50.675,0:23:52.875
After arriving at where it all started,

0:23:52.875,0:23:54.706
the first order of business was -

0:23:54.706,0:23:58.306
"Wraaa! Give me-" "Ah shut up!"

0:23:58.306,0:24:00.415
Remember that pyro flame we got earlier?

0:24:00.415,0:24:03.555
The smart thing to do would be to [br]actually use it.

0:24:04.298,0:24:06.266
This is probably a shit idea.

0:24:06.266,0:24:09.644
We can now head inside and kill the [br]Black Knight for a chunk.

0:24:13.710,0:24:19.500
Back at Andre, we use our mouse trick[br]once again to activate creative mode.

0:24:21.575,0:24:26.450
Now, to the catacombs, we take the [br]slow route this time,

0:24:26.450,0:24:28.991
turning the lever to activate the bridge,

0:24:28.991,0:24:31.360
and falling down to reach...

0:24:49.390,0:24:51.729
Ah, I thought this was supposed to do [br]fire damage.

0:24:51.729,0:24:54.968
For that, we can take a visit to [br]the Lower Undead Burg.

0:25:05.220,0:25:10.322
Unlock the shortcut, and buy fire arrows[br]from the female undead merchant.

0:25:15.658,0:25:19.257
Pretty good, probably not worth the [br]pyro flame though.

0:25:29.649,0:25:32.631
The invincibility frame afforded [br]by the flip ring,

0:25:32.631,0:25:36.521
combined with the near infinite poise [br]you get from backsteps,

0:25:36.521,0:25:40.171
is key to traversing the traps of [br]Sen's Fortress.

0:25:40.171,0:25:41.781
I also made this.

0:25:41.781,0:25:45.781
It has a quick and long backstep attack,[br]which is perfect for the flip ring.

0:25:47.940,0:25:51.940
I-frames, of course, has it's limits, and [br]that's where the bow comes in.

0:25:54.362,0:25:57.375
With good timing, we can poise through[br]the boulder.

0:25:57.866,0:25:59.860
"Jeez!"

0:25:59.860,0:26:03.646
And even with bad timing, we have just [br]enough time to avoid the next one.

0:26:08.340,0:26:14.564
"I genuinely don't like heights, okay, it's my [br]biggest failing. Among many, like you said."

0:26:15.181,0:26:18.959
The flip is barely fast enough to [br]avoid the fireballs,

0:26:18.959,0:26:22.959
but as long as you stay cool and don't[br]cave into the pressure -

0:26:24.743,0:26:26.203
"Oh, cock."

0:26:26.499,0:26:28.949
Never mind, could be worse.

0:26:28.949,0:26:31.646
After killing the fireball throwing giant,

0:26:32.801,0:26:35.846
we can finally reach the Iron Golem.

0:26:54.606,0:26:59.546
Big, wide, straight paved roads. [br]Now this is what I like to see.

0:27:00.281,0:27:01.431
"Cock."

0:27:01.431,0:27:03.301
Still, could be worse.

0:27:03.301,0:27:06.116
At least it doesn't have any pendulums [br]swinging above it.

0:27:06.177,0:27:09.107
After carefully navigating our way,

0:27:09.107,0:27:12.571
and using our bow to safely [br]dispatch any enemies,

0:27:12.571,0:27:14.531
we move forward.

0:27:32.452,0:27:33.992
"Oh, cock."

0:27:33.992,0:27:36.202
All other paths were blocked off,

0:27:36.202,0:27:38.755
except of course, the ladder.

0:27:40.610,0:27:44.831
The lever moves this spiral staircase, and[br]without it we are quite screwed.

0:27:48.350,0:27:51.410
"Oh hang on, hang on. Hello."

0:27:51.410,0:27:54.451
[RICHARD] "I heard you were in a bit of a [br]pickle, yeah?"

0:27:54.451,0:27:56.210
[JAMES] "Oh cock."

0:27:58.427,0:28:01.277
"Hahahahahaha" "Shut up!"

0:28:01.277,0:28:04.440
[RICHARD] So, if I do this, I get points for [br]helping, right?

0:28:04.440,0:28:05.862
[JAMES] "Erm... Sure!"

0:28:05.862,0:28:11.412
[RICHARD] Using my superior existence of legs, [br]I make quick work of the ladder and the ledge.

0:28:17.160,0:28:18.496
But it didn't work.

0:28:18.496,0:28:23.360
Well, turns out, these fog walls are only[br]accessible by the host,

0:28:23.360,0:28:24.616
which I am not.

0:28:26.307,0:28:27.827
It's all over, mate.

0:28:27.827,0:28:29.520
[JAMES] Oh, cock.

0:28:29.520,0:28:34.240
In my hour of need, Jeremy was, as ever,[br]right there for me.

0:28:34.240,0:28:35.168
[JEREMY] Greetings mate!

0:28:35.168,0:28:35.993
[JAMES] Moron!

0:28:35.993,0:28:38.915
[JEREMY] However, to our absolute dismay,

0:28:40.436,0:28:45.296
the fog wall was also inaccesible by an [br]invader as well.

0:28:45.296,0:28:48.450
We either admit defeat and end [br]the programme here,

0:28:48.450,0:28:50.330
[RICHARD] Well I'm for ending. Goodbye!

0:28:50.330,0:28:51.884
[BOTH LAUGHING]

0:28:59.477,0:29:04.857
[RICHARD] Using Jeremy, I trigger a backstab,[br]interact with the ladder at the same time,

0:29:04.857,0:29:06.237
and roll out.

0:29:09.788,0:29:12.929
This should trick the game into thinking[br]we are still on a ladder.

0:29:12.929,0:29:19.869
For example, when we run out of stamina[br]on a ladder, we fall off, like that.

0:29:20.758,0:29:26.128
The trick is to sync up a critical strike[br]to run out of stamina on the last hit.

0:29:28.131,0:29:31.131
[JEREMY] Could you just make that go [br]a bit further in the back?

0:29:31.131,0:29:33.811
[RICHARD] I don't want you to ever say [br]that to me again.

0:29:38.242,0:29:41.197
[JEREMY] Ow [BLEEP] [BLEEP] ow!

0:29:49.535,0:29:51.826
[RICHARD] Now for the moment of truth.

0:29:51.826,0:29:55.150
Can a phantom turn the lever?

0:29:58.330,0:30:03.363
YES! YES! HAHA! Oh, bliss!

0:30:14.770,0:30:15.377
Do we have a penis bone?

0:30:15.377,0:30:18.703
[JEREMY] Whales have penis bones. [br]We're getting off topic!

0:30:26.960,0:30:29.421
[JAMES] Sucks we had to get help from those [br]two blithering idiots,

0:30:29.421,0:30:31.204
shouldn't need any more though.

0:30:31.204,0:30:32.941
The biggest roadblock may be gone,

0:30:32.941,0:30:36.941
but there was still the entirety of[br]Anor Londo to face.

0:30:38.141,0:30:39.371
Cock.

0:30:40.922,0:30:45.802
Heavy armour isn't ideal. The greatarrows [br]are still strong enough to stagger.

0:30:45.802,0:30:50.962
Ranged wasn't an option either, as even[br]the longbow didn't have enough range.

0:30:51.386,0:30:54.147
So, our best option is mobility.

0:30:55.399,0:31:00.790
"No! No no no no! Other way![br]Other way you [BLEEP]!"

0:31:00.832,0:31:04.832
Thankfully, we can use quitouts to spawn[br]back on stable ground.

0:31:07.115,0:31:09.186
The strategy is quite simple, really.

0:31:09.186,0:31:13.186
You just get close enough and hope that[br]the Silver Knight switches to melee.

0:31:15.736,0:31:18.203
After that harrowing experience,

0:31:18.768,0:31:20.218
"Oh, cock.

0:31:20.218,0:31:23.544
What's this? Cheese?

0:31:24.884,0:31:25.944
Cheese.

0:31:27.593,0:31:28.833
Ow!"

0:31:28.833,0:31:30.906
Still, could be worse.

0:31:33.710,0:31:37.281
We can use our mobility and i-frames to [br]dodge through the attacks.

0:31:57.594,0:31:59.854
Against unanimous public opinion,

0:31:59.854,0:32:02.500
apparently, I need a new wardrobe.

0:32:03.310,0:32:05.641
Oh, hang on, hang on, ow!

0:32:05.641,0:32:10.111
We can't flip with heavy armour, but as[br]long as we can hit medium equip load,

0:32:10.111,0:32:13.456
we'll still be able to do a fast [br]enough backstep attack.

0:32:13.456,0:32:15.299
Which brings us to this.

0:32:17.242,0:32:20.960
We could use the ring to equip [br]the stone set, or even Havel's set.

0:32:20.960,0:32:25.700
Or alternatively, turn on creative mode [br]once more,

0:32:25.700,0:32:29.599
and buy a full set of upgraded Giant's.

0:32:29.916,0:32:35.086
James is looking fabulous today in this [br]30 piece cast iron spring ensemble

0:32:35.086,0:32:36.806
from ancient Minamisoma [?]

0:32:38.810,0:32:43.238
Best we can do is medium equip load [br]but we can still use backstep attacks.

0:33:08.199,0:33:11.831
With warping unlocked, we can return [br]to Firelink Shrine,

0:33:11.831,0:33:15.831
and place the Lordvessel to progress[br]past the golden fog gates.

0:33:18.106,0:33:21.917
"We can't kill the gargoyles and [br]ring the bell to open the gate."

0:33:24.320,0:33:29.510
Access to Frampt and the Lordvessel [br]was behind ringing the two bells.

0:33:29.510,0:33:34.310
And if you recall, the whole reason [br]behind the Sen's skip was because

0:33:34.310,0:33:38.051
we couldn't get to the gargoyles.

0:33:45.839,0:33:47.209
Or is it?

0:33:48.832,0:33:52.512
We flip. All the way back to [br]Darkroot Garden.

0:33:52.512,0:33:56.009
We joined the covenant beforehand, so it[br]should be an easy trip.

0:33:57.915,0:34:01.135
Why am I still getting hate?

0:34:01.614,0:34:03.744
Still. Could be worse.

0:34:03.744,0:34:06.917
Flipping through the area, we [br]arrive at Sif.

0:34:06.917,0:34:11.652
Now you could try melee, but flipping back[br]does put you, well, backwards.

0:34:12.205,0:34:14.995
So, it's better to stick with [br]ranged attacks.

0:34:17.706,0:34:22.846
With the covenant of Artorias, our [br]next destination was back to New Londo.

0:34:23.416,0:34:26.004
Good thing we drained the water [br]beforehand.

0:34:26.004,0:34:28.225
Doesn't make the area any safer though.

0:34:29.152,0:34:33.152
Darkwraiths can deal a tonne of [br]damage but are relatively squishy.

0:34:34.361,0:34:38.041
Don't forget to equip the ring before [br]falling down.

0:34:38.678,0:34:42.542
Since we had to take off the flip ring,[br]the best strategy was to put back

0:34:42.542,0:34:44.452
our trusty Giant's Set.

0:34:44.452,0:34:49.622
This is usually a test of damage [br]per second, but with the Giant armour,

0:34:49.622,0:34:52.174
it becomes a test of endurance.

0:35:25.505,0:35:32.525
"Greetings, undead warrior. You must[br]destroy the fading lord Gwyn,

0:35:32.525,0:35:39.365
who has coddled fire, and resisted[br]nature, and become the fourth lord."

0:35:39.365,0:35:41.365
But now, watch this.

0:35:41.365,0:35:43.345
"Very well..."

0:35:50.245,0:35:53.879
Since we had the Lordvessel before [br]defeating the Four Kings,

0:35:53.879,0:35:57.879
we can now access the Kiln without [br]defeating the gargoyles.

0:36:03.633,0:36:07.135
Friendship ended with Frampt, [br]now Kaathe is my best friend.

0:36:10.452,0:36:13.379
The closest gold fog was Lost Izalith.

0:36:13.639,0:36:16.310
We can use humanities to unlock [br]the shortcut,

0:36:16.310,0:36:18.990
but more importantly, outside [br]of the chamber,

0:36:18.990,0:36:21.681
we stand at the edge of the elevator.

0:36:24.380,0:36:27.064
We can do a couple of quitouts to do this.

0:36:30.654,0:36:31.724
"Ow!"

0:36:31.724,0:36:37.614
As always, if you have DSFix enabled, [br]disable it for this segment.

0:36:37.614,0:36:42.384
We technically haven't crossed the [br]fog gate, so the AI is disabled.

0:36:48.588,0:36:53.958
After reaching the shortcut, we hunt down [br]the Sunlight Maggot for a source of light.

0:36:53.958,0:36:56.978
And now, the last boss for this path.

0:36:57.690,0:36:58.791
"Ow!"

0:36:59.244,0:37:02.934
The trick is to backstep right [br]after the attack passes.

0:37:02.934,0:37:08.244
After that, we can use two firebombs in [br]quick succession to break the balls.

0:37:22.605,0:37:27.243
We already killed the Four Kings, [br]so only two lords remain.

0:37:27.243,0:37:29.293
And with the catacombs cleared out -

0:37:29.742,0:37:31.662
Still, could be worse.

0:37:31.662,0:37:35.428
Before coming here, make sure [br]you've killed the Sunlight Maggot,

0:37:35.428,0:37:38.300
otherwise it'll be a really bad time.

0:37:46.911,0:37:48.331
"Oh, cock."

0:37:57.553,0:38:01.794
Going through the Tomb of the Giants[br]isn't the only way to reach Nito.

0:38:01.794,0:38:06.506
We just need two things, and fortunately[br]you can get both in the same area.

0:38:06.506,0:38:11.728
First, was an Eye of Death, which we can[br]pick up behind a Titanite Demon.

0:38:11.728,0:38:15.234
Second, is a coffin, which is right [br]next to the Eye.

0:38:17.076,0:38:20.447
This teleports us straight to Nito's [br]boss room.

0:38:20.781,0:38:24.209
Now, normally this event is used [br]as a way to enter the covenant,

0:38:24.209,0:38:28.019
but we can use our bow to give [br]him quite a rude awakening.

0:38:30.614,0:38:35.264
While it was indeed the same area,[br]using the coffin deactivates the boss.

0:38:38.037,0:38:41.535
So we had no choice but to [br]Homeward Bone out.

0:38:51.614,0:38:56.454
By force quitting just before we load in,[br]we can confuse the game,

0:38:56.454,0:38:59.177
and teleport to the default location.

0:38:59.594,0:39:03.158
Since Nito's room is technically inside[br]the Tomb of Giants,

0:39:03.158,0:39:06.698
the default location is the start [br]of the Tomb of Giants.

0:39:06.698,0:39:11.378
And with the Sunlight Maggot, we can [br]make easy work of the area.

0:39:29.722,0:39:30.822
Cock.

0:39:47.578,0:39:53.568
"Ahh, you were at my side all along...

0:39:54.411,0:39:57.284
My true mentor...

0:39:57.760,0:40:00.790
my guiding moonlight..."

0:40:01.975,0:40:06.536
Now because of complex international music[br]licensing laws we're only allowed to show

0:40:06.536,0:40:10.366
you the very briefest clip from [br]this next song.

0:40:18.228,0:40:23.408
It has hyper armour, it has range,[br]and it can knock down.

0:40:23.408,0:40:25.638
Everything you could ever want.

0:40:25.638,0:40:29.136
Combined with the Giant's Armour, we [br]make short work of the area,

0:40:29.136,0:40:30.946
and the boss itself.

0:41:00.437,0:41:04.057
Back at Anor Londo, we flip our [br]way up to Duke's Archives.

0:41:04.057,0:41:08.527
First floor is easy enough, it [br]gets stuck behind an invisible wall.

0:41:09.349,0:41:12.539
Second one requires a bit more [br]personal touch.

0:41:14.535,0:41:17.778
The floor above housed a lot of [br]Crystal Soldiers.

0:41:19.589,0:41:24.117
Don't let the small size fool you, [br]they can hit like an absolute truck.

0:41:32.503,0:41:36.554
Now for Seath, first encounter is fake [br]so there's nothing you can do about that.

0:41:38.591,0:41:42.591
After spawning in the cell, we [br]can grab the key.

0:41:44.117,0:41:48.537
Stepping out triggers the defense, [br]but these things are weak to fire,

0:41:48.537,0:41:52.537
so my chaos weapon should be able to [br]handle them just fine.

0:42:01.840,0:42:05.359
The key to escaping the Archives [br]was on top of a ladder,

0:42:05.359,0:42:11.295
and even if we could somehow skip the key,[br]the door was above yet another ladder.

0:42:12.554,0:42:17.024
More concerning, we couldn't even [br]warp out to try a different method.

0:42:18.512,0:42:20.034
"Oh, cock."

0:42:29.560,0:42:33.115
Well, maybe not the last part, but [br]we are still in quite a pickle.

0:42:34.953,0:42:38.085
"Somebody! Please let me out of here!"

0:42:41.074,0:42:45.074
After saving Griggs, we buy [br]the fall control spell and a staff.

0:42:47.751,0:42:50.670
Back to the Archives, we clear [br]out the room,

0:42:50.670,0:42:53.620
activate the elevator, but quit out.

0:42:54.051,0:42:57.344
After that, we approach the edge [br]where the elevator used to be,

0:43:00.854,0:43:03.914
fall down, and quit out.

0:43:07.079,0:43:10.930
There are three outcomes to this, most[br]likely is getting stuck.

0:43:10.930,0:43:14.131
In this case, just darksign [br]out and try again.

0:43:14.131,0:43:16.944
Second outcome is immediately [br]slipping off,

0:43:16.944,0:43:18.947
also not ideal.

0:43:18.947,0:43:23.606
But the third one is you slip out,[br]but don't fall.

0:43:24.111,0:43:25.591
This is what you want to see.

0:43:25.591,0:43:28.235
Cast fall control and backstep off.

0:43:28.235,0:43:31.338
Two fake floors, and quit on third.

0:43:51.805,0:43:54.598
Like I hate, I hate heights, [br]you know I don't-

0:43:54.598,0:43:56.508
I hate ladders, I hate them.

0:43:56.508,0:43:58.568
Still, could be worse.

0:43:59.159,0:44:00.759
And then it was!

0:44:00.918,0:44:01.958
"Ow!"

0:44:05.088,0:44:10.818
Next up, was Seath. After we bait him to [br]break the crystal that he came to protect,

0:44:10.818,0:44:13.588
we trade blows until one of us dies.

0:44:24.789,0:44:29.329
With all four lords dead, we can finally [br]reach the Kiln of the First Flame,

0:44:29.329,0:44:31.526
and put down the old codger.

0:45:04.065,0:45:07.865
That's the entirety of Dark Souls [br]beaten without walking,

0:45:07.865,0:45:09.375
So 100 points for me.

0:45:09.375,0:45:12.815
[JEREMY] You do realise that since we[br]helped you in Anor Londo,

0:45:12.815,0:45:14.335
we also get points for that.

0:45:14.335,0:45:16.305
[RICHARD] Yeah, that was the deal, James.

0:45:16.801,0:45:18.071
[JAMES] Cock!

0:45:18.071,0:45:21.381
[JEREMY] So, 100 points for me for [br]standing next to the ladder.

0:45:21.381,0:45:24.821
[RICHARD] And can't forget 100 points for[br]me for pulling that lever.

0:45:24.821,0:45:28.971
[JAMES] This is quite honestly the biggest[br]load of limp-wristed twoddle -

0:45:28.971,0:45:31.341
[RICHARD] Yep, sorry mate. It's 100 [br]or nothing.

0:45:31.341,0:45:33.883
[JAMES] Oh, well alright then. So [br]we're even. Happy now?

0:45:33.883,0:45:38.791
[JEREMY] Not quite. Because as it turns[br]out, James, you actually get 0 points

0:45:38.791,0:45:39.979
for this challenge.

0:45:39.979,0:45:43.742
[JAMES] So I got help from you two, and [br]that somehow gives points to you,

0:45:43.742,0:45:45.642
and not me for finishing the challenge.

0:45:45.642,0:45:48.536
[JEREMY] No, James. It's because of this.

0:45:50.457,0:45:59.137
"Hahahahaha!" "Shut up!"

0:46:04.090,0:46:06.100
[JAMES] I was hoping you didn't know that.

0:46:10.914,0:46:14.361
Some say, he was the first ever Darkwraith[br]to exist.

0:46:14.361,0:46:15.141
[RICHARD] What?

0:46:15.141,0:46:17.621
This is not my character.

0:46:17.621,0:46:19.431
And he is called...

0:46:19.431,0:46:20.440
The Stig.

0:46:20.440,0:46:21.395
[JEREMY] Oh for...

0:46:23.598,0:46:26.259
[JAMES] In our previous attempt at [br]escaping the asylum,

0:46:26.259,0:46:28.879
we used two characters and an invasion.

0:46:29.358,0:46:33.134
This failed because the invasion didn't[br]happen in the asylum.

0:46:33.134,0:46:38.431
First, the Stig lures a hollow all the way[br]down to the nearest ladder.

0:46:39.086,0:46:44.306
As you may remember, we can trick the game[br]into thinking that we are on the ladder

0:46:44.306,0:46:50.946
by using a critical strike and [br]interacting with a ladder at the same time.

0:46:50.946,0:46:56.916
This stores our position next to the ladder, [br]so we can walk out into Firelink Shrine

0:46:56.916,0:47:00.916
and beyond, with our position [br]still in the asylum.

0:47:01.870,0:47:05.667
Getting staggered, or your weapon [br]bouncing against a wall, will break

0:47:05.667,0:47:09.346
ladder storage, so go full Havel [br]plus the dark hand.

0:47:11.913,0:47:14.406
Now we need to invade someone.

0:47:15.074,0:47:21.054
Our first pick would be Lautrec but that[br]would require going through Sen's Fortress.

0:47:21.054,0:47:25.338
A much easier solution was to invade a [br]player in the Undead Burg,

0:47:25.338,0:47:29.928
so after clearing out the area, we use[br]a Cracked Red Eye Orb.

0:47:35.843,0:47:39.843
It's not just invasion that's broken, [br]none of the online items work.

0:47:40.543,0:47:44.163
This was unfortunately because of ladder[br]storage.

0:47:44.163,0:47:48.656
We can see this by disabling ladder [br]storage, by running out of stamina.

0:47:50.964,0:47:55.286
I suspect this feature was implemented[br]to prevent people from invading

0:47:55.286,0:47:58.186
from unstable ground, like elevators.

0:47:59.616,0:48:02.503
Whatever the reason may have been, we[br]needed to perform

0:48:02.503,0:48:07.284
an invasion during ladder storage, and[br]since there was no way to do both,

0:48:07.284,0:48:10.293
we were once again on our wit's end.

0:48:10.293,0:48:14.155
[JEREMY] Oh no! That is such a shame!

0:48:14.155,0:48:17.403
Oh sorry James, that's really [br]a rotten bit of luck...

0:48:21.265,0:48:23.855
"You could not live with your own failure.

0:48:24.545,0:48:26.025
Where did that bring you?

0:48:26.560,0:48:27.850
Back to me."

0:48:28.021,0:48:32.271
[JEREMY] Problem is, Stig can't use an[br]online item while in ladder storage.

0:48:32.271,0:48:37.061
But he doesn't have to. Because I can.

0:48:38.835,0:48:43.875
The Gravelord Sign is the only way to [br]invade someone, without the invader

0:48:43.875,0:48:46.095
having to use an item.

0:48:47.587,0:48:51.142
[JAMES] Now, normally, using a Black [br]Separation Crystal will return you to

0:48:51.142,0:48:53.160
where you started the invasion.

0:48:53.160,0:48:56.849
But since our stable position was saved, [br]thanks to ladder storage,

0:48:56.849,0:49:00.849
Stig pops back up in Undead Asylum.

0:49:02.869,0:49:07.419
We've now invaded someone while technically[br]being inside the asylum.

0:49:07.804,0:49:12.594
Next, we create our main save file to [br]transfer this invasion coordinate,

0:49:15.489,0:49:18.403
and quit out completely to clear [br]the memory.

0:49:21.453,0:49:26.883
Back to Stig, we perform what is called a[br]"Purple Coward's Crystal Storage Invasion

0:49:26.883,0:49:30.083
Point Wrong Warp."[br]Quite a mouthful!

0:49:42.957,0:49:47.447
[JEREMY] With the power of friendship,[br]James was able to overcome the

0:49:47.447,0:49:53.177
impossible task of beating Dark Souls I[br]without walking.

0:49:53.600,0:49:57.600
[RICHARD] All of us had an essential role[br]to the run, and therefore

0:49:57.600,0:50:02.300
awarded 100 points, leading to the first [br]ever tie.

0:50:02.300,0:50:03.447
[JAMES] Well, uh...

0:50:03.447,0:50:04.198
[JEREMY] What?

0:50:04.198,0:50:08.917
[JAMES] This also means that the previous[br]run is possible without picking up the key.

0:50:08.917,0:50:13.733
And since the score was 100 or nothing,[br]this can only mean one thing.

0:50:13.733,0:50:15.048
[JEREMY] Oh for Christ's...

0:50:15.048,0:50:19.434
[JAMES] Straight away there which I think[br]you will find makes the winner!

0:50:21.406,0:50:24.020
The news caused a bit of a row.

0:50:24.020,0:50:24.737
[RICHARD] No!

0:50:24.737,0:50:27.526
[JEREMY] It's rubbish! That is actually,[br]genuinely rubbish.

0:50:27.526,0:50:29.819
[PAST RICHARD] Yep, sorry mate, it's [br]100 or nothing.

0:50:29.819,0:50:30.829
[JAMES] Just like you said!

0:50:30.829,0:50:31.809
[RICHARD] Oh for God's sake!

0:50:31.809,0:50:32.579
[JEREMY] It isn't!

0:50:32.579,0:50:33.200
[JAMES] It is!

0:50:33.200,0:50:35.827
[JEREMY] You can't just change the result[br]of a previous run, that's rubbish!

0:50:35.827,0:50:38.373
[JAMES] Anyways, I think we can at least[br]agree on one thing.

0:50:38.373,0:50:39.485
[JEREMY] And what would that be?

0:50:39.485,0:50:40.887
[RICHARD] Don't say it! Don't you dare[br]say it!

0:50:40.887,0:50:43.357
[JAMES] A skill issue.