[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.06,0:00:01.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Thanks again for stopping by.\N- Oh thanks, man.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.72,0:00:03.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I know Avengers is gonna be huge\Nand I'm always impressed,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:03.74,0:00:05.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially because, obviously,\Nyou are a far cry
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.70,0:00:07.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from that character we see on screen.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:07.78,0:00:10.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- The thing is, actually, people think \NLoki's this huge stretch for me
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.89,0:00:14.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but actually I'm quite like Loki.\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.75,0:00:17.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're... you're a Norse god.\N(both laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.90,0:00:20.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Obviously not with the, you know--\N(odd sound effect)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.02,0:00:24.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, you know, I like a good prank.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.04,0:00:25.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm a bit of a prankster.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.94,0:00:29.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can be... I can be pretty menacing.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.96,0:00:31.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(ominous music)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.46,0:00:33.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can go there.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:34.79,0:00:36.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Did something happen?\NAm I missing something?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.47,0:00:37.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm the prankster!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.25,0:00:40.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm the god of mischief!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:41.44,0:00:43.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.30,0:00:46.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the bad guy! (deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.03,0:00:49.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the god of mischief, \Nright here, right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.40,0:00:51.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.28,0:00:53.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Hey, Tom.\N- Hey, man.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.66,0:00:55.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- How's it going?\N- Yeah, good, good.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:55.44,0:00:56.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How's the afternoon?\N- It's good.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.74,0:00:58.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just need that coffee fix, you know?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.68,0:01:00.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- God, I totally know.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.18,0:01:04.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listen, I just made this.\NA cup of coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.41,0:01:05.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Thank you.\N- Freshly brewed.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.95,0:01:07.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Okay.\N- By the Loki-lizer.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.87,0:01:09.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- All right... thanks.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.28,0:01:10.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I can't survive without this stuff.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.60,0:01:12.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah, it's like the gas in my engine.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.67,0:01:14.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(both laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.32,0:01:15.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I totally know what you mean,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:15.57,0:01:17.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,except the funny thing \Nabout that coffee is, um...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.69,0:01:20.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's no gas in the engine.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.22,0:01:22.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What do you-- what are you talking about?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.59,0:01:24.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Well, there's no caffeine in it.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.54,0:01:28.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a decaf.\NI took the caffeine out.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.33,0:01:30.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I decaffed it.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.04,0:01:32.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Decaffinato.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:32.51,0:01:33.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- That's--\N- Decaffinited.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:33.85,0:01:35.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You got me.\N- Yep! No caffeine.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.26,0:01:37.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're gonna be so sleepy later.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.100,0:01:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Decaf!\N- Yep.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.00,0:01:40.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And you needed caffeine!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.50,0:01:44.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.72,0:01:48.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a prank!\N- All right, Tom.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:48.31,0:01:49.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You're gonna be so sleepy!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.74,0:01:51.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're not gonna be able to stay awake.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:51.54,0:01:53.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're gonna look like such an ass!\N- Yup.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.57,0:01:55.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Loki'd!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.78,0:01:59.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Probably about 10 bucks, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.42,0:02:01.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Actually, it's been paid for already.\N- What?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.62,0:02:03.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.97,0:02:05.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You're such an idiot!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.85,0:02:07.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I bought your lunch for you!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.57,0:02:09.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(chuckling)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.46,0:02:11.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've been Loki'd again!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:11.62,0:02:14.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Loki'd!\N- Okay. You got me again.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.87,0:02:18.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (deranged laugh) I'm the bad guy.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:20.18,0:02:22.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh god, I am moving slow today, man.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.38,0:02:27.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(clears throat) I got\Na delivery for a "Horowitz".
Dialogue: 0,0:02:27.52,0:02:29.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (sternly) Tom, enough.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.23,0:02:30.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Tom? Who's Tom?\N- You're Tom.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.97,0:02:32.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No, I'm Steve.\N- You're Tom Hiddleston
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.61,0:02:35.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you've been playing stupid pranks \Nall day and I want it to stop.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.18,0:02:37.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's your moustache, \NI suppose, that you grew.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.04,0:02:39.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah, man, this is my pride and joy.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.05,0:02:40.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is Wendy.\N- That's Wendy?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.74,0:02:42.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah.\N- Okay.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.01,0:02:45.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Look, I got a delivery for you.\NIt's mixed peanuts.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.76,0:02:48.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You want the peanuts?\N- Just give them to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:48.35,0:02:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Definitely no snakes in there!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:50.00,0:02:52.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not sure who it's from.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.75,0:02:54.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You know what? I'm sick of the pranks.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.49,0:02:55.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just leave.\N- Whoa! Whoa!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.94,0:02:57.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(boxes clatter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.50,0:03:03.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh god!\N- I think I broke my back.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.48,0:03:06.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Hey, buddy. How's it going?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:06.24,0:03:08.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (delivery man) I can't move!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.03,0:03:09.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What the fuck?\N- Oh my god.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:09.64,0:03:12.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I think I've broken my back. Oh god.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.74,0:03:13.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What'd you do to him?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.90,0:03:17.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I thought he was you.\NHe looks exactly like you.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.30,0:03:19.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Josh, he looks nothing like me.\NHe has a moustache.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.79,0:03:20.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(groaning in pain)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.93,0:03:23.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- He was gonna deliver you\Na can of peanuts or something.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:23.95,0:03:25.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We were chatting in the elevator.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.50,0:03:28.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I feel a bone coming out of my back!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.52,0:03:30.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's... it's touching the floor!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:32.09,0:03:34.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm sorry, Steve.\N- God!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:34.48,0:03:36.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Josh Horowitz ruined my life!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:37.82,0:03:40.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Steve, it's okay, man.\NJust hang in there.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.34,0:03:41.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listen, Josh, we got\Nto get you out of here.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:41.91,0:03:43.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The cops will be here any second.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:43.12,0:03:44.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you're gonna \Ngo down, I'm afraid, buddy.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:44.60,0:03:46.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's it. It's all over for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.61,0:03:47.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I hate you!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:47.77,0:03:49.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Just hang in there.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.11,0:03:50.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The ambulance is coming. I love you.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:57.75,0:03:58.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Loki'd!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.15,0:04:08.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(ominous music)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:09.27,0:04:10.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(rapping at door)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.90,0:04:12.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Hello?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.22,0:04:15.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Hi, Josh, it's Tom.\NIt's Tom Hiddleston.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.37,0:04:17.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just need to have a quick word.\NIs that all right?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.70,0:04:19.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah, are you okay? Tom?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:20.34,0:04:21.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh my god.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.45,0:04:24.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Well, hey.\N- Hi, Steve.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.59,0:04:28.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah. How are you, Josh?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.73,0:04:32.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm great. I see you're in a--\N- A wheelchair.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.62,0:04:35.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh yeah. You betcha.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:36.04,0:04:38.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I still got bones \Nsticking out of my back, man.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.55,0:04:40.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what the doctor said?\N- What's that?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.93,0:04:45.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- He said he'd never seen so much bone\Nsticking out of one man's back.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.26,0:04:48.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh, that's an unusual, um--
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.79,0:04:50.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- There's a lot of bone down there.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:52.01,0:04:55.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Well, um, you seem healthy otherwise.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:55.44,0:04:56.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah, I'm pretty healthy.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.47,0:04:58.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My wife... she left me.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.35,0:05:01.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She doesn't love me any more,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:03.43,0:05:06.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'll never feel her body \Nagainst mine one more time.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.36,0:05:08.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No more bodies for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.67,0:05:11.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I always meant to visit you\Nin the hospital.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.64,0:05:14.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just, uh-- I was \Nreally busy this last year.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.74,0:05:17.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh, yeah? You were busy?\NWhat were you doing?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.27,0:05:20.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I just had some-- work's been really busy.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:21.24,0:05:22.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What do you do?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.60,0:05:25.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you deliver things \Nfor people like I used to do?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.02,0:05:26.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You like public service?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.52,0:05:29.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Look, what can I do for you?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.58,0:05:31.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm happy to help in any way I can.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:31.14,0:05:32.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I know what you can do for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.79,0:05:34.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What? What can I do for you?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.64,0:05:37.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You can die, Josh Horowitz.\N- No, no, no.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.13,0:05:38.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,NO, NO, NO!\N(bang!)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:38.99,0:05:40.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(bang!)\N(Josh moans)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.62,0:05:46.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh yeah, that's how we do it.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:48.02,0:05:49.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yippie kay ey, motherfucker.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:49.73,0:05:50.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(bang!)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.70,0:05:56.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(deranged laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.95,0:05:59.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Loki'd! (deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.52,0:06:00.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the bad guy!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.85,0:06:02.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't believe he even fell for that!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:02.45,0:06:03.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're such an idiot!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.83,0:06:07.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.15,0:06:11.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is my escape plan! \NGoodbye, Josh!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.48,0:06:14.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See you in the next life. (deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.32,0:06:17.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the bad guy! (deranged laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.25,0:06:23.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(voice fading) Goodbye!