[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:01.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello down there!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.38,0:00:05.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just finished watching the\NSnow White live-action remake.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.86,0:00:09.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now, I'm leaving the\Nparking lot on my way home.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.23,0:00:12.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wasn't going to see\Nit initially because
Dialogue: 0,0:00:12.64,0:00:15.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm beyond tired of\Nlive-action remakes.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:15.84,0:00:16.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't like them.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.71,0:00:19.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I do not like greens eggs and ham.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.79,0:00:24.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the only reason I decided to\Ngo see this one is because
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.100,0:00:27.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,somehow there was a lot of\Nhype for it with people saying
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.99,0:00:30.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's one of the best live-action\Nremakes ever made.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.70,0:00:35.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now that I finished it,\NI can say I disagree.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.33,0:00:39.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I apologize for the wacky\Ncamera angle here
Dialogue: 0,0:00:39.47,0:00:41.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that looks like it's filming a dick pic,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.42,0:00:46.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I wanted to just\Ngive you my raw thoughts
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.62,0:00:48.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,immediately after seeing it.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.59,0:00:50.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't really like it.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.71,0:00:54.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know there was a lot of\Ncontroversy with the movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.93,0:00:58.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't really know what it all was.\NI didn't pay too much attention.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.30,0:01:00.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know the star, Rachel Zegler, apparently
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.83,0:01:02.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,had, like, some bad\Ninterviews or something
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.96,0:01:08.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Gal Gadot, people say, is, like,\Nthe worst actress of our generation.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.43,0:01:10.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Couldn't tell ya.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:11.37,0:01:14.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All I know is I didn't like the movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.39,0:01:21.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So setting aside the\Ncontroversy with it,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.73,0:01:23.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the film good in its own right?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.78,0:01:26.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not to me, it wasn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.39,0:01:31.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I'm also not the target\Ndemographic anymore,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.27,0:01:33.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm a fuckin' 30-year-old greaseball.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.41,0:01:39.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Snow White remake, it shares a\Nlittle bit in common with the original.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.42,0:01:42.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But it feels like it wanted\Nto carve its own path.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.85,0:01:45.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a little bit longer\Nthan the original,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.59,0:01:47.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so it adds a little bit more.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:47.19,0:01:52.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not a ton, but it adds things\Nthat nobody gives a fuck about
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.17,0:01:54.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it really feels like there\Nwas two different visions
Dialogue: 0,0:01:54.84,0:01:57.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for the film that ended up clashing.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.45,0:02:02.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So they have the seven dwarves,\Nbut they also have seven bandits,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.18,0:02:05.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which I don't get the point of.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.56,0:02:09.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only bandit that matters\Nis the main one, Jonathan.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.59,0:02:14.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every other bandit, I don't\Nthink they even had a name.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.13,0:02:17.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There was, like, one scene where\Nthey said one of their names,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:17.34,0:02:19.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you don't know who the\Nfuck they're talking about
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.51,0:02:22.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'cause they have never mentioned\Nany of them by name.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.34,0:02:24.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know why they're here.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.14,0:02:26.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It feels like they are\Nthe remnants of what
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.62,0:02:28.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the original direction\Nwas for this remake.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:28.66,0:02:33.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At least that's my little fuckin' tinfoil\Ncondom conspiracy theory.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.46,0:02:37.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It feels like the seven bandits were\Nsupposed to replace the dwarves
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.19,0:02:40.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but then they\Ndecided not to do that,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.61,0:02:43.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so now you have the seven\Nbandits and the seven dwarves,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.48,0:02:45.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it just doesn't mesh well at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:46.48,0:02:50.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Really, most of the movie I don't\Nthink meshes super well.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:50.43,0:02:52.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a lot of new songs in it that
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.18,0:02:55.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't recognize from the original\Nand I thought they blew ass.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.84,0:02:57.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I, I, I just, I wasn't a fan.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.52,0:03:01.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But there was a couple\Nsongs that I recognized from
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.40,0:03:02.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the original, and they were fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.58,0:03:05.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Those were kind of fun.\NLike the classic Heigh Ho,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:05.47,0:03:06.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that was kind of sweet.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.86,0:03:11.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Truthfully, I just don't have \Na whole lot to say about the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:03:11.08,0:03:14.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'cause it is absolutely just not for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.39,0:03:18.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I feel like I'm shouting\Nat the phone screen right now
Dialogue: 0,0:03:18.45,0:03:19.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like I got headphones on,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.04,0:03:22.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but... you know, it is what it is.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.94,0:03:27.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just... I don't... like, I (laughs)\NI really feel like
Dialogue: 0,0:03:27.70,0:03:30.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm at this point shaking my fist\Nat the clouds.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.60,0:03:33.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't really... don't see...
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.87,0:03:37.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,why you'd ever choose to watch this\Nover the original.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:37.38,0:03:40.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like, it's not a "bad" movie, really...
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.32,0:03:42.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like, it's not even terrible.\NI think, there's things about it
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.73,0:03:44.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that don't really work for me, personally.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:44.97,0:03:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, but it's, again\NIt's not for me
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.96,0:03:48.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not a 6 year old
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.09,0:03:52.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But like, when I'm watching this\Nand remembering the original
Dialogue: 0,0:03:52.14,0:03:53.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like the poison apple in the\Noriginal for example
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.97,0:03:54.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Big deal
Dialogue: 0,0:03:54.82,0:03:58.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like an actual huge\Npiece of the original
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.44,0:04:00.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In this one, it's nothing
Dialogue: 0,0:04:01.05,0:04:02.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is beyond nothing
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.25,0:04:05.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So like, the...
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.05,0:04:07.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The evil...
Dialogue: 0,0:04:08.96,0:04:11.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So when Snow White gets the poison apple
Dialogue: 0,0:04:11.31,0:04:12.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By Gal Gadot
Dialogue: 0,0:04:13.06,0:04:15.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She takes a bite and then she gets the\Nsleeping death
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.13,0:04:21.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, she only stays sleeping dead for\Nlike 10 minutes
Dialogue: 0,0:04:21.32,0:04:23.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It, it was a sleeping snooze
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.72,0:04:26.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like she actually just took a nap because
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.30,0:04:28.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she was only in that state for 2 scenes
Dialogue: 0,0:04:28.84,0:04:31.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then Jonathon came up\Nand gave her a kiss
Dialogue: 0,0:04:31.71,0:04:34.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then she was immediately freed from it
Dialogue: 0,0:04:34.13,0:04:35.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So like there's never, like it doesn't\Neven feel like there's
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.91,0:04:38.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ever anything at stake
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.14,0:04:39.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It doesn't even feel like serious
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.75,0:04:43.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It just, it's crazy to say this but
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.87,0:04:47.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It feels like it moves so fuckin' fast\Ndespite being longer than
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.08,0:04:48.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Longer than the original
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.79,0:04:52.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And yet offers less reasons to\Nget invested
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.11,0:04:54.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If that makes sense
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.95,0:04:56.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like I shit you not, she gets the fuckin'\Npoison apple,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.51,0:05:01.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she falls asleep with Gal Gadot,\Nlaying down all the evil stuff she's done
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.67,0:05:05.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The dwarfs come up and they're like\N"aw jinkies"
Dialogue: 0,0:05:05.43,0:05:07.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So then they hold like a fuckin' viking\Nburial
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.97,0:05:08.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,kind of
Dialogue: 0,0:05:08.57,0:05:09.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they put her on a rock
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.11,0:05:13.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they're like lamenting that she's\Nshed the mortal coil
Dialogue: 0,0:05:13.39,0:05:16.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And like it switches to another scene\Nwith Jonathon who
Dialogue: 0,0:05:16.42,0:05:19.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,breaks out of the, the castle, and then he
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.08,0:05:20.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,immediately shows up, and they're\Nstill there
Dialogue: 0,0:05:20.87,0:05:22.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like over her body, her corpse
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.88,0:05:25.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I think it's really only been like\N5 minutes
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.10,0:05:27.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They haven't begun the funeral
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.06,0:05:29.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Jonathon shows up and kisses her,\Nand she's fine
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.05,0:05:33.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So like, it never really feels like\Nanything's a big deal
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.06,0:05:37.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you're kinda just there to enjoy the\Nmusic moreso than anything
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.22,0:05:38.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which I wasn't liking
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.46,0:05:42.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And to be honest, while it's just me \Nand you here
Dialogue: 0,0:05:42.75,0:05:45.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I walked out of the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.19,0:05:47.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'm kind of embarrassed to say\Nthat 'cause
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.10,0:05:50.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I never walk out of movies, and this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.21,0:05:52.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like I said, isn't even like the worst\Nmovie I've ever seen or anything
Dialogue: 0,0:05:52.76,0:05:55.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not even the worst live-action remake\NI've seen
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.29,0:05:58.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I walked out with like the\Nlast 15 minutes
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.97,0:06:00.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Cause I was just so fuckin' bored
Dialogue: 0,0:06:01.23,0:06:04.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I really was just, really in a,\Nlike a, trance
Dialogue: 0,0:06:04.87,0:06:05.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like a ? state
Dialogue: 0,0:06:05.91,0:06:07.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I was ready to leave
Dialogue: 0,0:06:07.83,0:06:10.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I didn't, maybe the ending\Nreally saves it
Dialogue: 0,0:06:10.06,0:06:14.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe the ending ties it all together\Nwith an absolute masterpiece
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.21,0:06:15.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I doubt it
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.58,0:06:19.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now as someone who stared in the\NHunger Games MockingJay Part 1
Dialogue: 0,0:06:19.05,0:06:23.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I feel qualified to opine on acting\Nperformances
Dialogue: 0,0:06:23.73,0:06:27.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I would say, it was, fine, overall
Dialogue: 0,0:06:27.76,0:06:31.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like I, I actually think Rachel Zegler\Ndid a good job as Snow White
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.38,0:06:34.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like, she didn't do like anything crazy,\Nit wasn't y'know,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.78,0:06:36.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,some kind of Oscar worthy performance
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.39,0:06:38.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I thought it was really just, fine
Dialogue: 0,0:06:38.35,0:06:43.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gal Godot, on the other hand, I do not\Nthink was the right choice for this role
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.49,0:06:48.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It feels like she wanted to go like over\Nthe top and like ham it up, but
Dialogue: 0,0:06:48.05,0:06:49.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was a little reserved
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.86,0:06:52.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like didn't really commit to going\Ncrazy with it
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.06,0:06:54.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then it just kind of
Dialogue: 0,0:06:54.89,0:07:00.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Peters in this, really, bad purgatory\Nof just being flat
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.69,0:07:04.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like she's never over the top enough\Nthat it becomes charming
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.28,0:07:06.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and like disney villain like
Dialogue: 0,0:07:06.61,0:07:09.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it's also not played seriously\Nenough to the point where
Dialogue: 0,0:07:09.28,0:07:10.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you like take her seriously
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.66,0:07:12.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so she's just kind of dull
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.88,0:07:15.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And everyone else around them,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:15.67,0:07:17.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they don't have a big enough role \Nto play for me to
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.94,0:07:20.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,give a fuck to even talk about their performances
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.69,0:07:22.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I guess except for maybe Jonathon
Dialogue: 0,0:07:23.00,0:07:27.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But Jonathon, he just had to be in \Nlove with Snow White immediately and
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.25,0:07:28.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's kind of it
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.35,0:07:31.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So he didn't really get a whole lot\Nto do besides that
Dialogue: 0,0:07:32.53,0:07:38.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyway though, that's kinda my review\Nof Snow White live-action 2025
Dialogue: 0,0:07:39.26,0:07:40.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't like it very much
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.96,0:07:49.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I imagine if you're 6-years-old or\Nyou just really like disney live-action remakes
Dialogue: 0,0:07:49.08,0:07:52.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you'll probably be pretty satisfied with\Nthe film, I think, most likely
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.94,0:07:54.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,yep
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.16,0:07:56.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,well that's really about it
Dialogue: 0,0:07:57.88,0:08:01.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm driving right now, and I don't like\Nto take my eyes of the road
Dialogue: 0,0:08:01.05,0:08:04.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, when I get to the next red light,\NI'll, I'll stop the recording
Dialogue: 0,0:08:15.08,0:08:17.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hopefully you're having a good day
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.82,0:08:21.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My day's really alright,\Nhaven't done too much today
Dialogue: 0,0:08:21.23,0:08:22.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Except go see that movie
Dialogue: 0,0:08:23.85,0:08:26.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I guess I don't regret seeing it\NI guess it was worth giving it a try
Dialogue: 0,0:08:26.87,0:08:28.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now I know for sure
Dialogue: 0,0:08:29.06,0:08:32.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Probably done with live-action remakes,\Ny'know what I mean