WEBVTT 00:00:00.080 --> 00:00:01.066 I just don't think... 00:00:01.066 --> 00:00:02.006 How's it going? 00:00:02.006 --> 00:00:03.253 Hey 00:00:03.253 --> 00:00:04.225 Who are you voting for? 00:00:04.225 --> 00:00:04.909 What? 00:00:04.909 --> 00:00:07.640 I can't tell you that 00:00:07.640 --> 00:00:08.588 Cardinal Vincenzo 00:00:08.588 --> 00:00:09.680 Vincenzo? 00:00:09.680 --> 00:00:10.180 What? 00:00:10.180 --> 00:00:11.906 He said he'd give me his gelato 00:00:11.906 --> 00:00:12.804 for the rest of the conclave 00:00:12.804 --> 00:00:14.463 You can't vote for him 00:00:14.463 --> 00:00:15.061 Why not? 00:00:15.061 --> 00:00:16.896 He's trying to bring back fish on Fridays 00:00:16.896 --> 00:00:17.972 he loves fish 00:00:17.972 --> 00:00:18.472 What? 00:00:18.472 --> 00:00:18.972 Yeah 00:00:18.972 --> 00:00:19.573 I hate fish 00:00:19.573 --> 00:00:20.073 I know 00:00:20.073 --> 00:00:21.260 and he's trying to extend Lent 00:00:21.260 --> 00:00:22.307 by 3 days 00:00:22.307 --> 00:00:23.463 He can't do that, can he? 00:00:23.463 --> 00:00:24.679 I don't know 00:00:24.679 --> 00:00:25.918 I'm going for Kowalsski 00:00:25.918 --> 00:00:27.289 Ah he's a bit progressive 00:00:27.289 --> 00:00:28.294 He's not progressive 00:00:28.294 --> 00:00:30.156 He's trying to bring in those speedy prayers 00:00:30.156 --> 00:00:31.154 oh what are they? 00:00:31.154 --> 00:00:32.447 They're 5-second prayers 00:00:32.447 --> 00:00:33.646 That's too short 00:00:33.646 --> 00:00:36.071 He's trying to attract the Tik Tok generation 00:00:36.071 --> 00:00:38.134 He's trying to put soft cushions 00:00:38.134 --> 00:00:39.315 on the church pews 00:00:39.315 --> 00:00:41.696 But the hard wooden benches we get rid of them 00:00:41.696 --> 00:00:42.978 we're no better than the Protestants 00:00:42.978 --> 00:00:44.537 I'm going to go for Cardinal Schroeder 00:00:44.537 --> 00:00:45.193 Schroider? 00:00:45.193 --> 00:00:45.813 Yeah 00:00:45.813 --> 00:00:47.500 He wants to buy Manchester United 00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:48.741 The football team? 00:00:48.741 --> 00:00:50.185 All the other sovereigns are doing it 00:00:50.185 --> 00:00:51.268 it's good for brand image 00:00:51.268 --> 00:00:53.319 Hold on a second this is the same guy 00:00:53.319 --> 00:00:54.737 who wants to un-excommunicate 00:00:54.737 --> 00:00:56.295 Henry VIII 00:00:56.295 --> 00:00:57.192 Yeah he's a maniac 00:00:57.192 --> 00:00:58.888 He wants to restart that argument 00:00:58.888 --> 00:00:59.578 with Galileo 00:00:59.578 --> 00:01:00.473 i mean urgh 00:01:00.473 --> 00:01:01.267 it was settled 00:01:01.267 --> 00:01:01.926 it's done 00:01:01.926 --> 00:01:02.550 Yeah 00:01:02.550 --> 00:01:03.731 There's three of us right? 00:01:03.731 --> 00:01:04.231 Okay 00:01:04.231 --> 00:01:06.147 If we come together 00:01:06.147 --> 00:01:07.720 Our vote is way more powerful 00:01:07.720 --> 00:01:08.382 What are you saying? 00:01:08.382 --> 00:01:09.081 Well... 00:01:09.081 --> 00:01:10.372 There's never been 00:01:10.372 --> 00:01:12.759 an Irish Pope 00:01:12.759 --> 00:01:13.583 One of us? 00:01:13.583 --> 00:01:15.251 Yeah i don't see why not 00:01:15.251 --> 00:01:17.308 i already have a few ideas we could run on 00:01:17.308 --> 00:01:18.382 Okay, like what? 00:01:18.382 --> 00:01:20.681 Increasing the alcohol percentage 00:01:20.681 --> 00:01:21.684 of the alter wine 00:01:21.684 --> 00:01:23.411 Oh 00:01:23.411 --> 00:01:24.991 Sunday morning mass 00:01:24.991 --> 00:01:26.508 Starts at 11a.m 00:01:26.508 --> 00:01:27.443 not 8:30 00:01:27.443 --> 00:01:28.822 Nah that's way too early 00:01:28.822 --> 00:01:29.843 it's a weekend day 00:01:29.843 --> 00:01:30.521 come on 00:01:30.521 --> 00:01:31.021 Yeah I'm wrecked 00:01:31.021 --> 00:01:32.372 The communion wafer? 00:01:32.372 --> 00:01:33.102 Uh-huh 00:01:33.102 --> 00:01:33.896 Sure 00:01:33.896 --> 00:01:34.840 it could be bread 00:01:34.840 --> 00:01:35.516 Yeah 00:01:35.516 --> 00:01:36.843 or 00:01:36.843 --> 00:01:37.995 it could be 00:01:37.995 --> 00:01:38.982 potato 00:01:38.982 --> 00:01:40.357 You mean...? 00:01:40.357 --> 00:01:42.136 Crisps? 00:01:42.136 --> 00:01:43.611 Exactly 00:01:43.611 --> 00:01:45.317 cheese and onion flavor 00:01:45.317 --> 00:01:46.353 lads 00:01:46.353 --> 00:01:48.606 they'll be queuing around the block 00:01:50.187 --> 00:01:55.092 (hallelujah) 00:01:55.092 --> 00:01:57.640 The only thing better than seeing an Irish Pope 00:01:57.640 --> 00:02:00.307 would be seeing Foil Arms and Hog at Vicar Street 00:02:00.307 --> 00:02:02.547 tonight, tomorrow night, the next night 00:02:02.547 --> 00:02:04.418 or the 22nd and 23rd of May 00:02:05.160 --> 00:02:06.591 not on Sunday 00:02:06.591 --> 00:02:07.294 No God no 00:02:07.294 --> 00:02:08.182 No no no no 00:02:08.182 --> 00:02:09.288 but we are in Castlebar 00:02:09.288 --> 00:02:12.073 and then we're heading over to Australia and New Zealand in June 00:02:12.073 --> 00:02:17.919 Doomdah