WEBVTT

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Here's my next car,
Francine.

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The new Hummie
C.O.K. Guzzler.

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It runs on carbon,
oxygen and potassium.

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Oh, yeah...

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the chemical symbol
for potassium is K.

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Boy, my chemistry
is a little rusty,

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but wouldn't it run cleaner
if they added

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another carbon molecule
before the potassium?

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Then it would guzzle C.O.C.K.

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I don't know what
you're talking about.

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Oh, wow, look at this
sticker price.

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Can we even afford
this car, Stan?

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Of course we can.

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The trade-in
value of my SUV

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will cover a ton of
the cost. Watch this.

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(whistles)
Felix.

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Felix, I would like
to get 15 grand

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for the SUV
you sold me a while back

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and put it towards
a C.O.K. Guzzler.

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Stan, I'd love to get
you started guzzling C.O.K.,

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but I'm afraid
the Blue Book for your vehicle

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is barely $10,000.

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I couldn't do
any more than that.

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(laughing uncontrollably)

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I'll grant you,
sometimes my face smells bad,

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but that doesn't mean my head's
firmly planted in my ass, Felix.

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I can't go over
$10,000.

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(laughs)

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I know this car
can get fifteen,

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and I'm not settling
for a penny less.

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I'll just sell it myself.

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Oh, no, Stan,
really?

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Are you sure?

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Yes, I'm sure.

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(sniffs)

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Wh-What is,
what is that smell?

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I think it's your face.

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My God, it's getting worse.

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This place is just what
Langley Falls needs.

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A chic lounge environment
for young professionals.

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If they need it so much,

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how come there's nobody here?

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I'm gonna eat you one day.

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My bar is dead.
It doesn't make sense.

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I co-wrote City Slickers 
with Babaloo Mandel

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but I can't do this?

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(sighs)

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We need a, we need a draw.
We need a hook.

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WOMAN (faintly, in distance):
♪ There's a saying old

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♪ Says that love is blind

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♪ Still we're often told,

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♪ "Seek and ye shall find..."

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My dear Lord.

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♪ So I'm going to seek

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♪ A certain lad I had

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♪ In mind

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(grows louder):
♪ Looking everywhere

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♪ Haven't found him yet

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♪ He's the big affair

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♪ I cannot forget

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(shower running)
♪ Only man I ever think of

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♪ With regret...

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(gasps)

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Roger!
Oh, relax.

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It's nothing
I haven't seen before.

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You perv, get
out of here!

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I'll leave, after
I tell you this:

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You just got a job
singing in my lounge.

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Really?
Shut up.

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I want you there tomorrow night
wearing something amazing.

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Oh, and don't worry
about the camera.

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It's made of chocolate.

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(electricity crackles)
Ow! Oh, that's right,

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it's the toilet camera
that's chocolate.

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Oh, boy, that's on film.