0:00:10.541,0:00:12.844
- From the developer known[br]for a bunch of games

0:00:12.844,0:00:15.231
that are almost Dungeons and Dragons

0:00:15.231,0:00:17.915
comes the second great take[br]on D&D this year

0:00:17.915,0:00:21.419
and the most accurate D&D[br]video game to date

0:00:21.419,0:00:23.905
because the main characters[br]are a bunch of horny losers

0:00:23.905,0:00:26.026
that can't seem to do anything right.

0:00:26.026,0:00:27.776
Baldur's Gate 3.

0:00:27.776,0:00:31.795
Experience the buggiest open-world[br]game on the market

0:00:31.795,0:00:34.548
until two weeks from now,[br]when Starfield comes out

0:00:34.548,0:00:37.803
as you journey once more[br]into the world of Faerun,

0:00:37.803,0:00:42.424
a magical land of fantasy,[br]where everyone wants to [bleep] you,

0:00:42.424,0:00:46.911
including all the perverts in your party,[br]the sexy wildlife --

0:00:46.911,0:00:49.448
but mostly your own dice.

0:00:49.448,0:00:51.216
Other than that though,[br]Faerun isn't too different

0:00:51.216,0:00:53.101
from the real world[br]because everyone needs

0:00:53.101,0:00:56.237
a long rest and has[br]a serious case of brain worms.

0:00:56.237,0:01:00.359
Search the land for a way to get rid[br]of the worst hitchhiker of all time,

0:01:00.359,0:01:04.045
a wriggling mind flayer tadpole[br]that got plopped into your peeper,

0:01:04.045,0:01:06.631
which you have to fight[br]against the influence of

0:01:06.631,0:01:09.116
while trying to figure out[br]how to remove it

0:01:09.116,0:01:10.869
from your brain without dying

0:01:10.869,0:01:13.572
as your quest to pluck it out[br]has you trying everything

0:01:13.572,0:01:18.327
from homeopathic druid medicine,[br]to Githyanki torture chambers,

0:01:18.327,0:01:21.112
to just picking up a drifter[br]and letting him go to town

0:01:21.112,0:01:22.915
on your face with an icepick.

0:01:22.915,0:01:26.519
Why can I not summon health insurance?!

0:01:26.519,0:01:30.037
[Inaudible] your way through[br]every fantasy ride you start

0:01:30.037,0:01:32.941
with a robust character creation system

0:01:32.941,0:01:36.094
that, like D&D itself,[br]lets you create whatever

0:01:36.094,0:01:38.331
freak of nature your brain can conjure --

0:01:38.331,0:01:41.599
so long as it has [br]one of six genitalia options.

0:01:41.599,0:01:45.703
Then decide whether to be a brain,[br]an athlete, a basketcase,

0:01:45.703,0:01:49.608
a princess, a criminal,[br]or someone who's completely

0:01:49.608,0:01:51.477
[bleep] useless.

0:01:51.477,0:01:52.744
- [Inaudible]

0:01:52.744,0:01:54.762
The Breakfast Club.

0:01:54.762,0:01:57.949
- After which, you'll level up[br]with powerful new tadpole skills

0:01:57.949,0:02:00.519
and an impressive case [br]of not beating them

0:02:00.519,0:02:02.471
and therefore joining them

0:02:02.471,0:02:04.523
by using the parasites in your head

0:02:04.523,0:02:07.008
to learn stuff like "push"[br]and "migraine"

0:02:07.008,0:02:09.627
as all your companions tell you about[br]how bad of an idea it is

0:02:09.627,0:02:12.131
to listen to your literal dark passenger.

0:02:12.131,0:02:14.332
- I think we should resist these powers.

0:02:14.332,0:02:17.819
There are simply too many[br]unknowns for us to risk it.

0:02:17.819,0:02:21.156
- But you can always just peer pressure[br]into going full slug-mode with you.

0:02:21.156,0:02:24.726
Come on, Shadowheart! [br]Embrace the worm!

0:02:24.726,0:02:26.259
All the cool kids are doing it!

0:02:26.259,0:02:29.798
- Well... perhaps you have a point.

0:02:29.798,0:02:33.468
- Gather up your intrepid adventurers [br]in single-player mode

0:02:33.468,0:02:35.720
like a team of sexy Pokémon

0:02:35.720,0:02:38.622
and use their combined skills[br]like you would in real life,

0:02:38.622,0:02:41.609
trying to have conversations[br]that don't end in death threats,

0:02:41.609,0:02:44.078
then once things inevitably [br]go off the rails,

0:02:44.078,0:02:48.050
try to remember all your different moves[br]as you shove, stab,

0:02:48.050,0:02:51.186
and magic trick your way[br]through the incoming hordes.

0:02:51.186,0:02:52.653
- A legion, Michael.[br]- Hmm.

0:02:52.653,0:02:54.422
- [Inaudible] for money.

0:02:54.422,0:02:57.108
- And if that doesn't work,[br]you can cast the strongest spell

0:02:57.108,0:02:59.577
in the game -- save scumming.

0:02:59.577,0:03:02.097
Wait, it's been two hours[br]since I remembered to save?

0:03:02.097,0:03:05.065
What kind of game makes you[br]manually save in 2023?

0:03:05.065,0:03:09.120
Once you've decided to give up[br]on babysitting a bunch of NPCs,

0:03:09.120,0:03:12.023
bring your real life D&D group[br]into the virtual world

0:03:12.023,0:03:14.893
and watch them make[br]the same infuriating choices

0:03:14.893,0:03:16.478
that they do IRL,

0:03:16.478,0:03:18.947
steal all the loot for themselves,

0:03:18.947,0:03:21.650
and pick the most bonkers dialogue options

0:03:21.650,0:03:24.953
just to see if they can make you[br]actually explode for real.

0:03:24.953,0:03:27.022
Hey, if you're lucky,[br]this'll go exactly like

0:03:27.022,0:03:29.825
an actual tabletop session[br]and everyone will make excuses

0:03:29.825,0:03:32.127
to bail out of the campaign[br]after a couple weeks for some reason.

0:03:32.127,0:03:35.213
- [Inaudible] everything[br]we've been looking for.

0:03:35.213,0:03:38.516
- Go up against the scariest enemy[br]of the game --

0:03:38.516,0:03:40.469
the U.I. --

0:03:40.469,0:03:43.838
with so many inventories to manage,[br]that it feels like looking

0:03:43.838,0:03:45.557
at a Candy Crush level,

0:03:45.557,0:03:47.742
tooltips on tooltips on tooltips,

0:03:47.742,0:03:50.329
and row after row [br]of skills and spells

0:03:50.329,0:03:52.998
to make you just shrug[br]and use whatever's in your hand

0:03:52.998,0:03:54.133
at the time.

0:03:54.133,0:03:54.916
What?

0:03:54.916,0:03:56.718
[Inaudible] Excel sheets[br]in the middle of a war zone.

0:03:56.718,0:04:00.639
So grab a 20-sided die[br]and get ready to roll

0:04:00.639,0:04:03.625
the most nat ones[br]you've ever seen in your life

0:04:03.625,0:04:06.129
in a truly massive gaming experience

0:04:06.129,0:04:09.548
that will appeal to both old[br]and new fans of the series

0:04:09.548,0:04:13.153
thanks to its intriguing story,[br]fun characters,

0:04:13.153,0:04:16.171
and thrilling battles,[br]all coming together

0:04:16.171,0:04:19.824
to make an impressive approximation[br]of a real D&D campaign

0:04:19.824,0:04:23.511
run by the worst DM[br]in the entire [bleep] world.

0:04:23.511,0:04:25.631
Starring:

0:04:25.631,0:04:27.466
Emily the Strange,

0:04:27.466,0:04:29.118
Devil May Thighs,

0:04:29.118,0:04:31.969
Crank 2: High Voltage,[br]But With Magic,

0:04:31.969,0:04:33.554
Gethin' Busy,

0:04:33.554,0:04:35.974
I can't believe this sparkly twink[br]rejected me,

0:04:35.974,0:04:38.076
Wyll Nye the Demon Guy,

0:04:38.076,0:04:39.377
Papa Bear,

0:04:39.377,0:04:42.448
the MVP of celebrity[br]video game VAs,

0:04:42.448,0:04:45.950
and whatever your specific fetish[br]happens to be.

0:04:45.950,0:04:49.020
Baldur's Game 3:[br]Critical Hole.

0:04:49.020,0:04:51.706
Casuals have sex with a bear.

0:04:51.706,0:04:55.160
Real gamers seduce the emperor [br]of the mind flayers.

0:04:55.160,0:04:58.179
Comment below on what you[br]want to hear in my epic voice

0:04:58.179,0:05:01.583
and check out these other [br]epic gaming videos on GameSpot.

0:05:01.583,0:05:05.136
They mostly come at night. Mostly.

0:05:05.136,0:05:08.075
Don't call me Ratatouille.

0:05:08.075,0:05:10.926
How many Lowe's[br]could Rob Lowe rob

0:05:10.926,0:05:13.678
if Rob Lowe could rob Lowe's?

0:05:13.678,0:05:16.764
How's about maybe a thanks[br]for saving you from what appears to be,

0:05:16.764,0:05:20.286
I don't know, some kind [br]of sci-fi sideburn dimension?

0:05:20.286,0:05:23.454
I'm rotating a ferret.