WEBVTT

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We really wanted to know God.
So we decided to sell everything

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and go to a trip in South America.
We had heard

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about ayahuasca,
which is one of the psychedelic,

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most potent ones
that is used in ancient tribes

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like in the Amazon.
We wanted to experience that.

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I had seen documentaries
who talked about people

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who had experiences
and who had seen the spirit world

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and all these visions.
So I thought to myself,

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well, I know there is something now.
I'm not an atheist anymore,

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but if I can see the spirit world,
then I will have no doubts anymore.

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My wife was already kind of

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in a spiritual search.
She was more in what's called the New Age.

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So she would do meditation, yoga,
a bit of beliefs like that, the universe.

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But at the time, I was still an atheist.
But one day we had a long road trip

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from Montreal to New York City.
And on that road trip,

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there was three people: myself, my wife
and a friend who was a muslim.

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And we, all of us,
we explained our worldviews.

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One was the universe.
One was the Islam

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and myself was an atheist.

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So we came from the monkey.
There is no God.

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And at the end of this conversation,
I realized that what I was explaining

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was not my belief system, it was just
what I had been taught at school.

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So I was just repeating.

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So I thought to myself,
maybe I'm wrong on this question,

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very important that maybe there is a God.

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I started to look for who is this God?
Who is the Creator?

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I knew at the time
that I wouldn't find God in Islam

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or I thought in Catholicism either.
So I went in this path

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of Buddhism and Hinduism.
I started to pick up on conferences

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from different people. One was Alan Watts,
who talks a lot about Hinduism, Taoism,

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meditation and also the psychedelics.
And then I started to listen

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to Terence McKenna,
who talks a lot about psychedelics

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in a spiritual way.

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And so I studied this path,
which was part of it was experiences,

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and part of it was trying to understand
the theology behind it.

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What is the meaning of life?

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If there is a God,
then there is a purpose.

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There is a meaning, there is...
So I was trying to find what it was.

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And at the time
we had a company with my wife.

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It was very successful.
We had a lot of money,

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a lot of time, a lot of friends.
We were in love.

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So we had, in a way, everything that
you would want to be happy.

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But something was missing.
So there was an emptiness in our heart,

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We decided to sell everything
and go to a trip in South America.

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We had heard about ayahuasca

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I had seen documentaries
who talked about people

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who had experiences
and who had seen the spirit world

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and all these visions.
So I thought to myself,

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W ell, I know there is something now.

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if I can see the spirit world,
then I will have no doubts anymore.

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So we went we went to the Amazon in Peru,
and we did that experience.

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I had the idea to write a book

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during this experience,
and I said to myself,

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once you will write the book,
you will go back to the Amazon

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to have more visions.

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And so after that, we came to Spain
and we decided to, um,

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to buy a house a little bit isolated
from the civilization.

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To focus really on this
spiritual search

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My wife was an artist.
She started to paint

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and I was focusing on writing this book.

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This book was going to be about 
spirituality and personal development.

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But you cannot just talk
about spirituality

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without knowing what you're talking about.
So I was doing a lot of research.

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And at the time I had encountered a man
called Manly P. Hall.

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He has done a lot of conferences
and talks, a lot about esotericism,

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about different religions of the world.
And through this guy, I came

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to another set
of people, Annie Besant and Leadbeater,

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who were disciples of a woman
called Helena Blavatsky.

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She had written a book
called The Secret Doctrine,

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and this book is kind of the basis
of all the theology that these people use,

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and that all the modern books talk
about spirituality.

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They use the same ideas
coming from this book.

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Talks about reincarnation, karma,
the spirit world.

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Once I wrote my book,
I wanted to promote it.

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I opened the YouTube channel
and I started to talk about spirituality,

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On the side I was also still doing

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some psychedelic experiences
like LSD or mushrooms,

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and I had some experiences
that showed me that

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and I had some experiences
that kind of showed me

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that something was not exactly
what it seemed.

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At the time, I didn't have children,
but my wife was pregnant

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and at the time
I had picked up meditation.

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I would meditate every day,
30 minutes in the day,

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and I lived
in a very peaceful area in the nature.

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But when my wife gave birth
to our first child, our lives changed.

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Because when you have a child,
well, you get tired

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because they don't sleep much at night.
They are very demanding

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and so that comfortable life
well has been shaken.

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And then I realized
that I was not as peaceful

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as I thought I was.
I was not the Zen master

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that I believed I was
because I would lose my temper.

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Sometimes I would be aggressive.

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The second one is that
once I had finished my book,

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I was ready to go back to the ayahuasca
because this was

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the promise I made to myself.

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Through that ayahuasca retreat,

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I could see the mirror
of all my intentions

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that I had been selfish.

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It was a way of escaping my responsibility
as a father.

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So it was like a big shock
that I thought I was a good guy

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and that I was teaching people online
that I was a spiritual, uh,

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but in fact, I was really selfish.

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And the third one is the origin of evil.
Because through all that teaching,

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And the third one is the origin of evil.
Because through all that teaching,

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reading all this,
I didn't feel that I had found the truth

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with a big T. I have answers
about the meaning of life

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through reincarnation and karma,
but it was superficial,

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the origin., I couldn't understand
what is the origin of evil,

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I didn't feel like I had really
found it.

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And by studying the books 
on this problem,

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the origin of evil,
from the people

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that I was studying, I got answers
that didn't make sense.

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They said that evil doesn't exist,
that it's just relative.

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For example, cancer is a bad thing
for the person who dies from cancer.

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But if you take the point of view
of the cancer itself,

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it's good because he has
he has food from the body that it kills.

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It doesn't make any sense, right?
This is madness to me.

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But this is what they explain.
When I digested these three things,

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I was not as zen as I thought.
This path is not working.

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I was worse than I thought I was,
and I was not even aware

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that I had
all these selfish intentions in my heart.

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And I didn't find the truth.
I realized this path is not working.

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So it had been almost more
than seven years, almost eight years.

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And so one day I cried out to God.
I really, with the bottom

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of my heart crying.
I said, God help me, I cannot do it

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myself, please help me. And very shortly
after that, I had the first reply.

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I got in contact to Christian content.
So first of all, I heard more about Jesus.

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I heard more about the Christianity,
the message.

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Until one day I was doing some 
research on the fallen angels.

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I found a documentary. 
And in this documentary

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they talk about the fall of man,
the deception of Satan,

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who wants to deceive people away from God,
the fallen angels who are demons,

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who pretend to be spiritual guides
and men in this world

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who are part of an organization
called the Freemasonry, who actually

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worship Lucifer and are connected
to so-called masters, ascended Masters,

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spirit guides who guide 
them to illumination

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to become as gods. And so this is exactly
what the theology I was following

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in this new age. All this meditation,
all the yoga that you do,

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is to attain illumination,
to realize that you are actually God.

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In this documentary, they explained
that it's actually

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the exact same deception
that Satan used with Adam

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and Eve in the Garden of Eden.
And so I realized:

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it looks like I had I have been deceived.
But what really opened my eyes was that,

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first of all,
they quoted a lot of things from books,

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from these people who I had translated
some of the conferences

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had put on my YouTube channel,
and the quotes

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were saying that Lucifer
is their God

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and all these people were 
Freemasons from the 33rd degrees.

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And the second one was a quote

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from the Bible, Ephesians
6:12 'we do not fight

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against flesh and blood,
but against spiritualities,

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against spirits in high places'.
When I read that, I understood

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that we are part of a spiritual world,
and the weapons of this war

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is not swords or bullets or guns.
It's lies, ideas.

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I understood, it looks
like I've been deceived.

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But more than that,
when I saw Ephesians, I said,

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But more than that,
when I saw Ephesians, I said,

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What is Ephesians?
I don't know Ephesians.

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I've read a lot of books
about spirituality,

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but I've never heard about Ephesians.
Ephesians is obviously

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it's part of the New Testament.
And I had not read the Bible

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because these people, these Freemasons,
they say that the Bible

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has been corrupted,
that we don't have the real Gospels.

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When I saw that documentary,
the first thing I did

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was to do some research about the Bible.
Has the Bible been changed?

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And I realized that
no, it has not been changed.

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We have six, almost 6000 manuscripts
of the New Testament in Greek.

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The Old Testament has been preserved.
What we have, what when we read the Bible,

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is what has been written.

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There was a split moment
when my flesh didn't want it, this truth,

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because I had put a lot of work
in all these videos,

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and I had also prepared that image
of me being a spiritual leader.

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So part of me didn't want this to be true.
But once you taste the truth,

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if you are sincere,
it doesn't matter the cost

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because you want the truth.
So I decided to change.

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To block all my videos
that was teaching this lie

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and started to tell people
about this deception.

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And when I read the Bible, I started
from Genesis to Revelation

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when I arrived at the New Testament,
when I read Romans chapter two: 'you

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who think you are teaching others,
do you teach yourself?

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You who say, do not steal,
do you not steal?'

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So it was like the Bible
was talking to me directly

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and I felt convicted.
And so at the end of it understood

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that the truth that I was looking
was in the Bible

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because the truth is in Jesus.
Jesus is the truth, the way and the life

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and the origin of evil is from is coming
from the deception of the devil.

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So I understood also, I couldn't change
myself because it's impossible.

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Only God can change you
when you surrender.

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And the last one is: I had
all these selfish intentions.

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I had a broken heart
because I was a sinner

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and I needed redemption.
I needed to be forgiven.

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I went with a tent in a mountain

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and I confessed
all my sins in front of God.

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I ask forgiveness for all my sins,
and I asked him forgiveness

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for having been fooled
and having been deceiving other people

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also through the YouTube channel.
And I said I wanted

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to give my life to him.

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to sleep on the tent on the mountain.
And that night I had a dream.

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but it was more than a dream.
It was like a vivid experience

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that one man, very evil man,
came with a long knife

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and he wanted to kill me. And behind him,
standing with a peaceful presence

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was Jesus Christ,
who just took his arm like this.

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I understood that it was God showing me
that I am no more

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under the power of the evil,
and that now God is protecting me.

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And after that we decided to 
baptize each other in water.

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My wife and I, at the time
we were living in an isolated area.

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We didn't have any Christians around us.
We just obeyed

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to what we read in the Bible.
And so we baptized each other in water.

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But one day during that period,

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someone sent me
a commentary to my YouTube channel

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and ask me my opinion about a movie.
And the movie

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was from The Last Reformation.
It was The Life.

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And when I watched the end
of the movie at the end,

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when it was the last song
I felt the Holy Spirit.

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At that time, I didn't know
it was the Holy Spirit,

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but I felt an experience
that overwhelmed me

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with a very strong conviction
that you should be baptized

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in the Holy Spirit
and you should sell your house and go.

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I was so shaken that I lay on the floor
for like ten minutes with this.

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I went to the website of TLR
and I found someone on the Map.

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Elizabeth who is a sister now in Barcelona
and I told her what happened to me.

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Can you come to our house and pray for us?
And she came with a couple of brothers

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to our house, the week later.
They prayed, first of all for my wife,

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and she started to cry.
She received the baptism

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of the Holy Spirit. But from the outside,
what I saw was she was starting to cry.

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She was starting to be very emotional
and started to speak in tongues.

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So I thought, okay, this is working
because at the time I wasn't sure

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if it's going to it
was going to happen or not.

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Even though I had checked on the Bible
that yes, this

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is what we read in the Bible.
And so then it was my my turn.

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We prayed for the baptism 
of the Holy Spirit

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right away, it it fell on me from,

00:14:58.208 --> 00:15:04.541
from below with a very
strong love presence and a heat.

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I was sweating very profusely
and with this

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very strong conviction
that I want to do the will of God now,

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not just my will.
After that, I decided to pray

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and fast for a week
about the second thing,

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which was you should sell your house
and go because I really

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didn't want to leave Spain.

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After six days

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I received a reply from my prayers.
I felt God was telling me

00:15:29.541 --> 00:15:33.625
that your place is not here.
Your house is not in this world.

00:15:34.125 --> 00:15:39.541
You have a place in the sky,
but this is just a small period of time

00:15:39.625 --> 00:15:43.958
and with a peace also. So I said, okay,
this is this is what we should do.

00:15:44.041 --> 00:15:47.083
So we put the house on sale
and for about three months

00:15:47.416 --> 00:15:50.958
until we really left Canada,
this sister Elisabet,

00:15:51.041 --> 00:15:53.458
with a couple of brothers,
they came every week

00:15:53.541 --> 00:15:56.541
to a house to disciple us.
So we started to learn

00:15:56.625 --> 00:16:00.500
about praying for people on the streets,
trying to share the gospel.

00:16:00.583 --> 00:16:04.666
And after about three months we left
and we arrived in Canada.

00:16:04.916 --> 00:16:08.000
It was a very difficult time,
especially for my wife,

00:16:08.083 --> 00:16:10.791
but also for myself
because it was very cold.

00:16:10.875 --> 00:16:14.541
We were used to living in Spain.
A very comfortable life.

00:16:14.625 --> 00:16:17.750
Through that
God was working in our heart and trying.

00:16:18.041 --> 00:16:23.541
It was revealing things that, you know,
character that was important to change.

00:16:23.625 --> 00:16:26.708
And after nine months
we decided to to come back to Spain.

00:16:27.041 --> 00:16:29.375
All the doors were blocked in Canada,
so we understood

00:16:29.458 --> 00:16:34.333
that we were not meant to be there,
but we were sent to Canada

00:16:34.791 --> 00:16:38.791
so that it could work in our heart.
Before we left Canada, I went for a PTS,

00:16:38.875 --> 00:16:41.375
which is a Pioneer Training School
for two weeks

00:16:41.750 --> 00:16:46.416
with Olivier and Julian and his teams.
It was a wonderful time.

00:16:46.791 --> 00:16:51.333
I felt really connected with God,
could hear His voice, His presence,

00:16:51.416 --> 00:16:54.333
and that was a really wonderful time.
And so I thought,

00:16:54.708 --> 00:16:57.166
that would be a good thing
to do for my wife also.

00:16:57.333 --> 00:16:59.833
And so when we came to Spain,
we did the PTS,

00:16:59.916 --> 00:17:04.125
but this time it was for my wife
and it was in the south of Spain

00:17:04.958 --> 00:17:07.458
with Robbert and with you guys.
And obviously

00:17:07.791 --> 00:17:11.125
this was also a very powerful time,
especially for my wife.

00:17:22.375 --> 00:17:28.041
We bought an apartment where we live now,
and we went to a process of renovating it.

00:17:29.041 --> 00:17:31.666
It was kind of a being
completely involved again.

00:17:31.750 --> 00:17:34.916
And I felt disconnected
a little bit from God

00:17:35.000 --> 00:17:37.583
because I didn't pray
as much as I used to.

00:17:37.791 --> 00:17:41.125
I didn't have a lot of fellowship,
and I felt a little bit

00:17:41.208 --> 00:17:45.625
distanced from God.
But I also couldn't do videos on YouTube

00:17:45.875 --> 00:17:50.166
as I used to before.
And at first, I kind of felt bad about it

00:17:50.250 --> 00:17:53.291
because I had the idea
that I have to perform,

00:17:53.375 --> 00:17:55.666
I have to do things for God,
but I couldn't.

00:17:55.750 --> 00:17:58.458
So I felt
like I was not doing the right thing.

00:17:59.041 --> 00:18:02.750
But God was working in my heart to
so that I could understand

00:18:02.833 --> 00:18:06.083
that it's not just about doing,
it's also about being,

00:18:06.208 --> 00:18:09.750
about connecting to God
and being close to Him.

00:18:11.250 --> 00:18:16.250
And being aligned to His will.
Because yes, He does want to save souls

00:18:16.500 --> 00:18:19.541
and He wants us to share about the gospel,
to pray for people.

00:18:19.708 --> 00:18:23.000
But He also has a will.
And there are seasons in our lives.

00:18:23.250 --> 00:18:26.250
And I understood that,
that it's better to be aligned

00:18:26.333 --> 00:18:29.416
with the will of God
than just doing things on our own flesh,

00:18:29.500 --> 00:18:34.125
on our own will. So I had to learn that,
and I'm still learning it.

00:18:40.291 --> 00:18:43.875
So in conclusion, I would like to say
that I have often regretted

00:18:43.958 --> 00:18:45.708
that it took me so long to find Jesus.

00:18:46.916 --> 00:18:49.333
But now I believe that God allowed me

00:18:49.500 --> 00:18:53.000
to spend all this time
in reading a lot of spiritual books,

00:18:53.125 --> 00:18:55.791
doing ascetic practices,
and spending time and money

00:18:55.875 --> 00:18:58.500
in spiritual retreats so that others
don't have

00:18:58.583 --> 00:19:01.333
to do it
when they realize it doesn't lead to God.

00:19:02.958 --> 00:19:06.125
The Christian path is not an easy one,
but the peace and love

00:19:06.208 --> 00:19:09.541
that is found in Jesus Christ
as your Lord and Savior

00:19:09.625 --> 00:19:12.500
are worth giving up everything,
and it is the only path

00:19:12.583 --> 00:19:16.541
that will take you through the storms
of this life to the everlasting peace

00:19:16.625 --> 00:19:20.250
in heaven. If you haven't been born again.
I really want to encourage you

00:19:20.333 --> 00:19:24.541
to repent and believe in the gospel.
Be baptized and follow Jesus.

00:19:24.625 --> 00:19:27.125
I pray that the Holy Spirit
will touch you today,

00:19:27.208 --> 00:19:29.666
that God will heal you,
that he will restore you,

00:19:29.750 --> 00:19:34.458
and that he will use you for his glory.
I pray in Jesus name, Amen.