[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Welcome to Prankers.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Today I'm gonna prank my dad into funding \Na God of War Game-as-a-Service.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: This week, we were \Ngraced and inconvenienced
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by a brand-new Xbox Developer Direct.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Last year I thought it was funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that they used the exact same \Nopening song 2 years in a row.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[bright music]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, this year it would be silly \Nto assume they'd try anything new.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's copy and paste at this point.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[same bright music]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why that's weird is that Xbox's whole business \Nhas changed dramatically since January of 2023
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and so has its marketing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But for some reason, \Nthe Developer Direct remains unchanged.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Someone at Microsoft likes these \Nexactly the way they are.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But you know what?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That makes the small ways in which they \Nare different stand out even more.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here are:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Firstly:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For some reason, \Nthere was a brand-new warning
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at the beginning of \Nthis year's presentation.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not sure that would \Nstand out to anyone, right?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That doesn't seem unusual.\NBut Xbox has never done that before.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even looking at their \Nmost recent game showcase,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all they had was this \NMature Content warning.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the Developer Direct warning \Ndoesn't stop there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Turns out, \Nit's not really a warning.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It says:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, got it!\NSo this is just commercial time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Back when Xbox deleted day-one benefits \Nfrom the regular Game Pass tier,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was making light of the fact they \Ncouldn't say their favorite phrase anymore,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Day 1 with Game Pass."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look, Game Pass Ultimate \Nis the one that has Day 1 games.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Core and Standard do not.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How silly of you to think \NStandard Game Pass would have Day 1.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But they just keep saying it.\NNothing's actually changed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You gotta read between the lines.\NPC and Ultimate is implied here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[HONK]\NYou know what,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you'll figure it out \Nwhen you get to the website.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The good news warning continues:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It sits in the same portion \Nof a presentation
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where you would typically have \Nsome sort of disclaimer.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,However, at this point, \Nit is purely commercial speech.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this, to me, IS Xbox right now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is the current mission statement \Nof the Xbox brand.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Finally:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,appears\Nand then a silly little animation for it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's really what they give you.\NThey give you a little show.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Less than ever, this feels like \Ndevelopers directly talking to you
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and more like they're just \Nputting on a little play for us
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that was written by their PR managers\Nwho are grinding their teeth backstage.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Consider this moment here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,MARTY STRATTON: --at our \Nmost ambitious game yet.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is Doom: The Dark Ages.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,HUGO MARTIN: That was so stupid\NI mouthed the words.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[everyone laughs]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: I think that's a fun, \Nhonest, humorous moment.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,However, it is only funny, \Nit can only exist,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'cause everything up to that point \NWAS rehearsed, WAS scripted.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's funny because of how weird \Neverything else feels.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This could be filled with developers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,genuinely talking off-the-cuff about \Nwhat they've been working on,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but for the most part, it's fluffy, \Nmeaningless mission statements.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,JASMIN ROY: At Compulsion Games, \Nwe love to craft around central themes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Another big difference between \NDeveloper Directs in previous years is:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The very indignity of seeing PS5 advertised \Nin an Xbox showcase.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, one might think, \N"Obviously in previous years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they were all Xbox exclusives.\NThere was no opportunity to put PS5 in here."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But no, look at Visions of Mana\Nand Minecraft Legends here,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,free from the blight \Nof PlayStation references.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By the way, they only did \Nthese funny doodles Year 1.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They stopped that immediately.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But yeah, even as recently \Nas last year's Xbox Showcase,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they didn't mention the PS5.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But why would you?\NYou don't do that kind of thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nintendo doesn't do that.\NSony doesn't do that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You don't talk about-- You don't \Nadvertise other people's consoles.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's ridiculous.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[drawl] Well, lookee here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,While this may not seem like \Na big deal at first glance,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it is the indubitable flag \Nrepresenting the pivot.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"From this day forth," says Xbox,\N"We do not fear the PS5.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Cause remember:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So really, if you buy this on PS5,\Nyou're only hurting yourself.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Really, it's kinda stupid \Nif you don't give us $20 a month.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kinda just wasting your income.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kinda think you're bad at economics."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Last big change,\Nfor the first time in one of these:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Remember, \Nthe beauty of a Developer Direct
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that there are no \Nmanipulative, hotshot trailers,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no fancy editing.\NGive me sloppy editing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,HAZEL'S MOM: As long as you \Ndidn't forget the--
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,HAZEL: --flashlights and batteries.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,HAZEL'S MOM: Oh shoot, \Nwe've got 5 minutes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: Yeah, that hits the spot.\NAnd you know what else?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like it when developers are talking,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not reading off of some \Nteleprompter somewhere.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,STRATTON: A lot has changed since then\Nbut our team is as passionate as ever.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: That's what I'm talkin' about.\NTrailers are for other shows.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Developer Directs, \N50 minutes of authenticity.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But really, the most exciting portion \Nof this Developer Direct
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was not just the revelation \Nthat a pretty nice Ninja Gaiden 4
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is in development \Nfrom Team Ninja and Platinum Games,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but also that Ninja Gaiden 2 Black exists\Nand it looks better than this new game.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you can:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kind of confusing sentence.\NI see now why they're typing out PS5.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what I mean to say is,\Nafter all this, I do wonder if
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the tried and true Nintendo Direct method \Nof trailer, explanation, information
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is still the best way \Nto do this kind of thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look at how they introduced Expedition 33.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[somber piano plays]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[French singing]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,GUILLAUME BROCHE: Bonjour, everyone.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: Yeah, they were in no rush\Nto show you that video game.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First things first, \Nlook at these tall ceilings.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,To be clear, though, \NI do think Expedition 33
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,brought the best presentation \Nof the entire direct,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,demonstrating clearly how it's both \Nsimilar and different to your expectations,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,unafraid to expose its pointlessly \Ncomplicated passive effect system,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a true enthusiasm \Nto introduce the world map.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Okay, almost true enthusiasm.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Try to tell me when this developer \Nreiterates that there's a world map,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that it comes off as unscripted.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,TOM GUILLERMAN: --a completely 3D \Nand navigatable world map.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, we've got a world map.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: To me, it's just incredibly off-putting \Nhow seemingly afraid they are
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to just let developers speak freely \Nin a potentially sub-optimal manner.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"What if it's not entertaining enough?\NWe could lose viewers."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, in fairness, \Nthey never promised a documentary.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In fact, I wonder if that WAS a warning.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,MENACING VOICE: Enjoy the show.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,KYLE: Despite that, \Ndespite the abundant artifice,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I do think Developer Directs are one of the \Nmost interesting ways to present a showcase.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That they really-- They spend a lot of \Ntime on the games themselves.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,50 minutes for 4 games \Nis actually pretty crazy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I really, really like that someone \Nat Xbox recognizes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that some of these mid-budget games \Nare truly interesting
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and deserve the full spotlight.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't think it was a better \Npresentation than last year's
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I'm going to give it a better grade
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because my expectations are just \Ngenerally sinking across the board.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Therefore:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's Delayed Input.\NI'll be back next week.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks for watching.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Alright, so one of the things that \Nactually stands out to me the most
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from the entire presentation
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is how soft and silly the new Doom looks.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's right, I'm officially putting \NDoom: The Dark Ages
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on Dum-Dum Watch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Doom is dangerously close \Nto transitioning from
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this absolutely unassailable, \Ncool guy franchise to
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,an absolute dorkfest,\Nat least how it's presented.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Doom somehow became some sort of \NDo What the Circle Tells You To Do game.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hit an enemy until a purple circle appears\Nand then walk over and kill it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's made clear, just looking at it,\Nthat the Doom team
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is trying to take this franchise in a more\Nwide market direction.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And they'll even tell you that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,STRATTON: