Welcome to Prankers.

Today I'm gonna prank my dad into funding 
a God of War Game-as-a-Service.

KYLE: This week, we were 
graced and inconvenienced

by a brand-new Xbox Developer Direct.

Last year I thought it was funny

that they used the exact same 
opening song 2 years in a row.

[bright music]

Now, this year it would be silly 
to assume they'd try anything new.

It's copy and paste at this point.

[same bright music]

Why that's weird is that Xbox's whole business 
has changed dramatically since January of 2023

and so has its marketing.

But for some reason, 
the Developer Direct remains unchanged.

Someone at Microsoft likes these 
exactly the way they are.

But you know what?

That makes the small ways in which they 
are different stand out even more.

Here are:

Firstly:

For some reason, 
there was a brand-new warning

at the beginning of 
this year's presentation.

I'm not sure that would 
stand out to anyone, right?

That doesn't seem unusual.
But Xbox has never done that before.

Even looking at their 
most recent game showcase,

all they had was this 
Mature Content warning.

But the Developer Direct warning 
doesn't stop there.

Turns out, 
it's not really a warning. It says:

Oh, got it!
So this is just commercial time.

Back when Xbox deleted Day 1 benefits 
from the regular Game Pass tier,

I was making light of the fact they 
couldn't say their favorite phrase anymore,

"Day 1 with Game Pass."

Look, Game Pass Ultimate 
is the one that has Day 1 games.

Core and Standard do not.

How silly of you to think 
Standard Game Pass would have Day 1.

But they just keep saying it.
Nothing's actually changed.

You gotta read between the lines.
PC and Ultimate is implied here.

[HONK]

You know what, you'll figure it out 
when you get to the website.

The good news warning continues:

It sits in the same portion 
of a presentation

where you would typically have 
some sort of disclaimer.

However, at this point, 
it is purely commercial speech.

And this, to me, IS Xbox right now.

This is the current mission statement 
of the Xbox brand.

Finally:

appears
and then a silly little animation for it.

And that's really what they give you.
They give you a little show.

Less than ever, this feels like 
developers directly talking to you

and more like they're just 
putting on a little play for us

that was written by their PR managers
who are grinding their teeth backstage.

Consider this moment here.

MARTY STRATTON: --at our 
most ambitious game yet.

This is Doom: The Dark Ages.

HUGO MARTIN: That was so stupid
I mouthed the words.

[everyone laughs]

KYLE: I think that's a fun, 
honest, humorous moment.

However, it is only funny, 
it can only exist,

because everything up to that point 
WAS rehearsed, WAS scripted.

It's funny because of how weird 
everything else feels.

This could be filled with developers

genuinely talking off-the-cuff about 
what they've been working on,

but for the most part, it's fluffy, 
meaningless mission statements.

JASMIN ROY: At Compulsion Games, 
we love to craft around central themes.

Another big difference between 
Developer Directs in previous years is:

The very indignity of seeing PS5 advertised 
in an Xbox showcase.

Now, one might think, 
"Obviously in previous years

they were all Xbox exclusives.
There was no opportunity to put PS5 in here."

But no, look at Visions of Mana
and Minecraft Legends here,

free from the blight 
of PlayStation references.

By the way, they only did 
these funny doodles Year 1.

They stopped that immediately.

But yeah, even as recently 
as last year's Xbox Showcase,

they didn't mention the PS5.

But why would you?
You don't do that kind of thing.

Nintendo doesn't do that.
Sony doesn't do that.

You don't talk about-- You don't 
advertise other people's consoles.

That's ridiculous.

[drawl] Well, lookee here.

While this may not seem like 
a big deal at first glance,

it is the indubitable flag 
representing the pivot.

"From this day forth," says Xbox,
"We do not fear the PS5.

'Cause remember,
all this stuff is on Game Pass.

You could buy once, you could play it all on your Xbox and Xbox PC app.

So really, if you buy this on PS5,
you're only hurtin' yourself.

Really, it's kinda stupid 
if you don't give us $20 a month.

Kinda just wasting your income.

Kinda think you're bad at economics."

Last big change,
for the first time in one of these:

Remember, 
the beauty of a Developer Direct

is that there are no 
manipulative, hotshot trailers,

no fancy editing.
Give me sloppy editing.

HAZEL'S MOM: As long as you 
didn't forget the--

HAZEL: --flashlights and batteries.

HAZEL'S MOM: Oh, shoot,
we've got 5 minutes.

KYLE: Yeah, that hits the spot.
And you know what else?

I like it when developers are talking,

not reading off of some 
teleprompter somewhere.

STRATTON: A lot has changed since then
but our team is as passionate as ever.

KYLE: That's what I'm talkin' about.
Trailers are for other shows.

Developer Directs, 
50 minutes of authenticity.

But really, the most exciting portion 
of this Developer Direct

was not just the revelation 
that a pretty nice Ninja Gaiden 4

is in development 
from Team Ninja and Platinum Games,

but also that Ninja Gaiden 2 Black exists
and it looks better than this new game. And:

Kind of confusing sentence.
I see now why they're typing out PS5.

But what I mean to say is,
after all this, I do wonder if

the tried and true Nintendo Direct method 
of trailer, explanation, information

is still the best way 
to do this kind of thing.

Look at how they introduced Expedition 33.

[somber piano plays]

[French singing]

GUILLAUME BROCHE: Bonjour, everyone.

KYLE: Yeah, they were in no rush
to show you that video game.

"First things first, 
look at these tall ceilings."

To be clear, though, 
I do think Expedition 33

brought the best presentation 
of the entire direct,

demonstrating clearly how it's both 
similar and different to your expectations,

unafraid to expose its pointlessly 
complicated passive effect system,

and a true enthusiasm 
to introduce the world map.

Okay, almost true enthusiasm.

Try to tell me when this developer 
reiterates that there's a world map,

that it comes off as unscripted.

TOM GUILLERMAN: --a completely 3D 
and navigatable world map.

Yes, we've got a world map.

KYLE: To me, it's just incredibly off-putting 
how seemingly afraid they are

to just let developers speak freely 
in a potentially sub-optimal manner.

"What if it's not entertaining enough?
We could lose viewers."

But, in fairness, 
they never promised a documentary.

In fact, I wonder if that WAS a warning.

MENACING VOICE: Enjoy the show.

KYLE: Despite that, 
despite the abundance of artifice,

I do think Developer Directs are one of the 
most interesting ways to present a showcase.

That they really-- They spend a lot of 
time on the games themselves.

50 minutes for 4 games 
is actually pretty crazy.

And I really, really like that someone 
at Xbox recognizes

that some of these mid-budget games 
are truly interesting

and deserve the full spotlight.

I don't think it was a better 
presentation than last year's

but I'm going to give it a better grade

because my expectations are just 
generally sinking across the board.

Therefore:

And that's Delayed Input.
I'll be back next week.

Thanks for watching.

Alright, so one of the things that 
actually stands out to me the most

from the entire presentation

is how soft and silly the new Doom looks.

That's right, I'm officially putting 
Doom: The Dark Ages

on Dum-Dum Watch.

Doom is dangerously close 
to transitioning from

this absolutely unassailable, 
cool guy franchise to

an absolute dorkfest,
at least how it's presented.

Doom somehow became some sort of 
Do What the Circle Tells You To Do game.

Hit an enemy until a purple circle appears
and then walk over and kill it.

It's made clear, just looking at it,
that the Doom team

is trying to take this franchise in a more
wide market direction.

And they'll even tell you that.

STRATTON: So in 2016, 
we asked you to run and gun.

In Doom Eternal it was jump and shoot.

And in Doom: The Dark Ages
you're gonna stand and fight.

KYLE: And remember, 
that's the pre-approved PR.

They're proud of that.
And what's--

What's so funny about it, to me, 
is that "stand and fight"

is the least interesting option 
of those 3 things.

And it's not like we weren't 
fighting before.

And the accompanying clip 
that demonstrates this is indeed boring.

Looks like the player's just 
pressing the buttons

that game is explicitly 
asking them to press.

I'm not even sure you have to aim.

Look at this example of one of their 
big, new, expansive levels.

It's so weird to me. It's so weird that 
the demons are just organized.

They're just lined up 
waiting for you to come kill them.

Look at these 5 shield guys.

I guess that should be 
an intimidating obstacle.

Ideally, you'd look at 5 shield guys 
and you think,

"Oh, okay. 
How am I gonna flank them?

I gotta figure out what angle 
to hit this from."

When, no, we all know you're gonna hit 'em 
with the shield and they all die in one hit.

I don't care how much you 
jack up the speed.

It's gonna look stupid at any difficulty.

And again, stupid is not necessarily bad.
I've been known to enjoy some stupid games.

But Doom presents itself as cool.

Let me ask you something:
Do you buy this?

Do you believe those buildings 
have occupants in them?

Do you feel huge?
You feel like you're a big robot?

'Cause to me, it looks airy.
It looks weightless.

Epic on paper, cartoonish in practice.
"Oh good, another purple circle."

And look, I know I'm just basing this off 
of the presentation I watched today,

which was made for a mass market.

I'm not saying for certain the game will be 
dumb and silly and Disney XD-level drama.

But

it is officially on Dum-Dum Watch.

STRATTON: And if that wasn't enough,
we also have for you

your very own fire-breathing, 
gatling gun-toting cybernetic dragon.