WEBVTT 00:00:01.030 --> 00:00:04.220 [Applause] 00:00:19.060 --> 00:00:22.550 [Applause] 00:00:22.550 --> 00:00:28.020 so I'm embarrassed that I have a career 00:00:28.020 --> 00:00:31.919 I talk about things like trust and 00:00:31.919 --> 00:00:34.230 cooperation and there should be no 00:00:34.230 --> 00:00:37.410 demand for my work but the fact of the 00:00:37.410 --> 00:00:39.540 matter is is there is demand for my work 00:00:39.540 --> 00:00:41.210 which means that there's an opportunity 00:00:41.210 --> 00:00:44.250 it means that trust and cooperation are 00:00:44.250 --> 00:00:46.650 not yet standard in our organizations 00:00:46.650 --> 00:00:48.180 and yet they should be and we know that 00:00:48.180 --> 00:00:49.769 which is why we're looking for ways to 00:00:49.769 --> 00:00:52.760 bring those things to our organizations 00:00:52.760 --> 00:00:54.570 so I thought I would do something a 00:00:54.570 --> 00:00:56.339 little different today you know when 00:00:56.339 --> 00:00:58.650 you're speaking to tens of thousands of 00:00:58.650 --> 00:01:00.390 people and you have the opportunity to 00:01:00.390 --> 00:01:02.549 share a message of course most rational 00:01:02.549 --> 00:01:03.989 people would say let's go with something 00:01:03.989 --> 00:01:06.060 I've talked about lots of times and I'm 00:01:06.060 --> 00:01:10.140 really good at but I'm not normal so I'm 00:01:10.140 --> 00:01:12.240 gonna do something completely new and I 00:01:12.240 --> 00:01:15.509 hope this works out there are two things 00:01:15.509 --> 00:01:16.920 that I think that great leaders need to 00:01:16.920 --> 00:01:20.280 have empathy and perspective and I think 00:01:20.280 --> 00:01:21.720 these things are very often forgotten 00:01:21.720 --> 00:01:24.359 leaders are so often so concerned about 00:01:24.359 --> 00:01:26.100 their status of their position and 00:01:26.100 --> 00:01:27.539 organization they actually forget their 00:01:27.539 --> 00:01:30.570 real job and the real job of a leader is 00:01:30.570 --> 00:01:33.030 not about being in charge it's about 00:01:33.030 --> 00:01:36.390 taking care of those in our charge and I 00:01:36.390 --> 00:01:38.130 don't think people realize this and I 00:01:38.130 --> 00:01:40.200 don't think people train for this when 00:01:40.200 --> 00:01:43.049 we're junior our only responsibility is 00:01:43.049 --> 00:01:44.850 to be good at our jobs that's all we 00:01:44.850 --> 00:01:46.859 really have to do and some people 00:01:46.859 --> 00:01:49.399 actually go get advanced education and 00:01:49.399 --> 00:01:51.539 so that they can be really good at their 00:01:51.539 --> 00:01:53.579 jobs accountants or whatever right and 00:01:53.579 --> 00:01:55.979 you show up and you work hard and the 00:01:55.979 --> 00:01:58.409 company will give us tons and tons of 00:01:58.409 --> 00:02:00.630 training how to do our jobs they'll 00:02:00.630 --> 00:02:02.249 shows how to use the software they'll 00:02:02.249 --> 00:02:04.170 send us away for a few days to get 00:02:04.170 --> 00:02:06.240 trained in whatever it is that we're 00:02:06.240 --> 00:02:07.770 doing for the company and then they 00:02:07.770 --> 00:02:09.990 expect us to go be good at our jobs and 00:02:09.990 --> 00:02:11.850 that's what we do we work very hard and 00:02:11.850 --> 00:02:15.930 if you're good at your job they'll 00:02:15.930 --> 00:02:19.650 promote you and at some point you'll get 00:02:19.650 --> 00:02:21.120 promoted to position where we're now 00:02:21.120 --> 00:02:22.709 responsible for the people who do the 00:02:22.709 --> 00:02:25.230 job we used to do but nobody shows us 00:02:25.230 --> 00:02:27.330 how to do that and that's why we get 00:02:27.330 --> 00:02:29.489 managers and not leaders because the 00:02:29.489 --> 00:02:30.410 reason our managers 00:02:30.410 --> 00:02:31.760 micromanaging us is because they 00:02:31.760 --> 00:02:33.860 actually do know how to do the job 00:02:33.860 --> 00:02:35.510 better than us that's what got them 00:02:35.510 --> 00:02:39.110 promoted really what we have to do is go 00:02:39.110 --> 00:02:41.150 through a transition some people make it 00:02:41.150 --> 00:02:43.130 quickly some people make it slowly and 00:02:43.130 --> 00:02:44.390 unfortunately some people will never 00:02:44.390 --> 00:02:46.670 make that transition at all which is we 00:02:46.670 --> 00:02:48.110 have to go this through this transition 00:02:48.110 --> 00:02:50.120 of being responsible for the job and 00:02:50.120 --> 00:02:51.950 then turning it to somebody who's now 00:02:51.950 --> 00:02:53.930 responsible for the people who are 00:02:53.930 --> 00:02:56.180 responsible for the job and as I said 00:02:56.180 --> 00:02:57.680 before one of the great things that is 00:02:57.680 --> 00:03:00.050 lacking in most of our companies is that 00:03:00.050 --> 00:03:03.640 they are not teaching us how to lead and 00:03:03.640 --> 00:03:06.980 leadership is a skill like any other is 00:03:06.980 --> 00:03:10.160 a practice' balloon able skill and it is 00:03:10.160 --> 00:03:11.720 something that you work on it's like a 00:03:11.720 --> 00:03:13.690 muscle if you practice it all the days 00:03:13.690 --> 00:03:15.710 you will get good at it and you will get 00:03:15.710 --> 00:03:17.600 to become a strong leader if you stop 00:03:17.600 --> 00:03:19.250 practicing you will become a weak leader 00:03:19.250 --> 00:03:22.760 like parenting everyone has the capacity 00:03:22.760 --> 00:03:25.910 to be a parent doesn't mean everybody 00:03:25.910 --> 00:03:28.010 wants to be a parent and doesn't mean 00:03:28.010 --> 00:03:29.590 everybody shouldn't be a parent 00:03:29.590 --> 00:03:32.480 leadership is the same we all have the 00:03:32.480 --> 00:03:35.180 capacity to be a leader doesn't mean 00:03:35.180 --> 00:03:37.010 everybody should be a leader and it 00:03:37.010 --> 00:03:38.330 doesn't mean everybody wants to be a 00:03:38.330 --> 00:03:40.850 leader and the reason is because it 00:03:40.850 --> 00:03:44.260 comes at great personal sacrifice 00:03:44.260 --> 00:03:47.090 remember you're not in charge you're 00:03:47.090 --> 00:03:49.330 responsible for those in your charge 00:03:49.330 --> 00:03:51.650 that means things like when everything 00:03:51.650 --> 00:03:53.180 goes right you have to give away all the 00:03:53.180 --> 00:03:54.800 credit and when everything goes wrong 00:03:54.800 --> 00:03:56.810 you have to take all the responsibility 00:03:56.810 --> 00:04:01.040 that sucks right it's things like 00:04:01.040 --> 00:04:03.290 staying late to show somebody what to do 00:04:03.290 --> 00:04:06.110 it's things like when something does 00:04:06.110 --> 00:04:08.120 actually break when something goes wrong 00:04:08.120 --> 00:04:10.130 instead of yelling and screaming and 00:04:10.130 --> 00:04:14.330 taking over you say try again when the 00:04:14.330 --> 00:04:16.040 overwhelming pressures are not on them 00:04:16.040 --> 00:04:19.370 the overwhelming pressures are on us at 00:04:19.370 --> 00:04:21.529 the end of the day great leaders are not 00:04:21.529 --> 00:04:23.060 responsible for the job they're 00:04:23.060 --> 00:04:24.230 responsible for the people who are 00:04:24.230 --> 00:04:26.180 responsible for the job they're not even 00:04:26.180 --> 00:04:28.340 responsible for the results I love 00:04:28.340 --> 00:04:30.200 talking to CEOs and say what's your 00:04:30.200 --> 00:04:31.820 priority and they put their hands on 00:04:31.820 --> 00:04:33.380 their hips old proud and say my priority 00:04:33.380 --> 00:04:35.419 is my customer I'm like really even talk 00:04:35.419 --> 00:04:38.350 to a customer in 15 years 00:04:39.360 --> 00:04:41.949 there's no CEO on the planet responsible 00:04:41.949 --> 00:04:43.539 for the customer they're just not 00:04:43.539 --> 00:04:45.969 they're responsible for the people who 00:04:45.969 --> 00:04:47.680 responsible for the people who 00:04:47.680 --> 00:04:49.779 responsible for the customer I'll tell 00:04:49.779 --> 00:04:51.729 you a true story a few months ago I 00:04:51.729 --> 00:04:55.719 stayed at the Four Seasons in Las Vegas 00:04:55.719 --> 00:05:00.039 it is a wonderful hotel and the reason 00:05:00.039 --> 00:05:01.539 it's a wonderful hotel is not because of 00:05:01.539 --> 00:05:04.569 the fancy beds any hotel can go and buy 00:05:04.569 --> 00:05:05.919 a fancy bed 00:05:05.919 --> 00:05:07.960 the reason it's a wonderful hotel is 00:05:07.960 --> 00:05:09.460 because of the people who work there 00:05:09.460 --> 00:05:11.319 if you walk past somebody at the Four 00:05:11.319 --> 00:05:12.789 Seasons than this and they say hello to 00:05:12.789 --> 00:05:14.529 you you get the feeling that they 00:05:14.529 --> 00:05:16.479 actually wanted to say hello to you it's 00:05:16.479 --> 00:05:17.710 not that somebody told them that you 00:05:17.710 --> 00:05:19.090 have to say hello to all the customers 00:05:19.090 --> 00:05:20.740 say hello to all the guests right you 00:05:20.740 --> 00:05:23.680 actually feel that they care now in 00:05:23.680 --> 00:05:27.250 their Lobby they have a coffee stand and 00:05:27.250 --> 00:05:29.289 I one afternoon I went to buy a cup of 00:05:29.289 --> 00:05:31.060 coffee and there was a barista by the 00:05:31.060 --> 00:05:33.659 name of Noah who was serving me Noah was 00:05:33.659 --> 00:05:37.779 fantastic he was friendly and fun and he 00:05:37.779 --> 00:05:39.639 was engaging with me and I had so much 00:05:39.639 --> 00:05:41.050 fun buying a cup of coffee I actually 00:05:41.050 --> 00:05:43.210 think I gave a hundred percent tip right 00:05:43.210 --> 00:05:46.150 he was wonderful so as is my nature I 00:05:46.150 --> 00:05:49.389 asked Noah do you like your job and 00:05:49.389 --> 00:05:51.759 without skipping a beat Noah says I love 00:05:51.759 --> 00:05:54.669 my job and so I followed up I said what 00:05:54.669 --> 00:05:56.409 is it that the four seasons is doing 00:05:56.409 --> 00:05:59.830 that would make you say to me I love my 00:05:59.830 --> 00:06:02.529 job and without skipping a beat Noah 00:06:02.529 --> 00:06:04.810 said throughout the day managers will 00:06:04.810 --> 00:06:07.300 walk past me and ask me how I'm doing if 00:06:07.300 --> 00:06:08.919 there's anything that I need to do my 00:06:08.919 --> 00:06:11.050 job better he said not just my manager 00:06:11.050 --> 00:06:14.379 any manager and then he said something 00:06:14.379 --> 00:06:18.460 magical he says I also work at Caesars 00:06:18.460 --> 00:06:20.889 Palace and Caesars at Caesar's Palace 00:06:20.889 --> 00:06:22.300 the managers are trying to make sure 00:06:22.300 --> 00:06:23.710 we're doing everything right they catch 00:06:23.710 --> 00:06:26.500 us when we do things wrong he says when 00:06:26.500 --> 00:06:28.060 I go to work there I like to keep my 00:06:28.060 --> 00:06:30.250 head under the radar and just get 00:06:30.250 --> 00:06:32.520 through the day so I can get my paycheck 00:06:32.520 --> 00:06:35.889 he says here at the Four Seasons I feel 00:06:35.889 --> 00:06:42.009 I can be myself same person entirely a 00:06:42.009 --> 00:06:44.560 different experience from the from the 00:06:44.560 --> 00:06:46.959 customer who will engage with Noah so we 00:06:46.959 --> 00:06:48.819 in leadership are always criticizing the 00:06:48.819 --> 00:06:50.529 people we're always saying we gotta get 00:06:50.529 --> 00:06:51.260 the right people 00:06:51.260 --> 00:06:53.240 I've got to film I run my team I gotta 00:06:53.240 --> 00:06:54.950 get the right people but the reality is 00:06:54.950 --> 00:06:56.930 it's not the people it's the leadership 00:06:56.930 --> 00:07:00.650 if we create the right environment we 00:07:00.650 --> 00:07:02.900 will get people like Noah at the four 00:07:02.900 --> 00:07:04.970 seasons if we create the wrong 00:07:04.970 --> 00:07:06.950 environment we will get people like Noah 00:07:06.950 --> 00:07:10.460 at Caesar's Palace it's not the people 00:07:10.460 --> 00:07:12.790 and yet we're so quick to hire and fire 00:07:12.790 --> 00:07:15.710 you can't hire and fire your children if 00:07:15.710 --> 00:07:18.230 there's if your kids are struggling we 00:07:18.230 --> 00:07:20.150 don't say you got to see at school 00:07:20.150 --> 00:07:25.100 you're up for adoption so why is it that 00:07:25.100 --> 00:07:26.960 when somebody has performance problems 00:07:26.960 --> 00:07:29.240 at work why is it that our instinct is 00:07:29.240 --> 00:07:33.220 to say you're out we do not practice 00:07:33.220 --> 00:07:35.810 empathy what does empathy look like 00:07:35.810 --> 00:07:37.460 here's the lack of empathy this is 00:07:37.460 --> 00:07:39.470 normal in our business world you walk 00:07:39.470 --> 00:07:40.880 into someone's office someone walks into 00:07:40.880 --> 00:07:42.620 our office and says your numbers have 00:07:42.620 --> 00:07:44.210 been down for the third quarter in a row 00:07:44.210 --> 00:07:46.340 you have to pick up your numbers 00:07:46.340 --> 00:07:48.290 otherwise I can't guarantee what the 00:07:48.290 --> 00:07:50.510 future will look like how inspired you 00:07:50.510 --> 00:07:52.250 think that person is to come to work the 00:07:52.250 --> 00:07:54.650 next day here's what empathy looks like 00:07:54.650 --> 00:07:56.540 you walk into someone's office someone 00:07:56.540 --> 00:07:57.680 walks into your office and says your 00:07:57.680 --> 00:07:59.510 numbers are down for the third quarter 00:07:59.510 --> 00:08:03.050 in a row are you okay I'm worried about 00:08:03.050 --> 00:08:03.620 you 00:08:03.620 --> 00:08:06.860 what's going on we all have performance 00:08:06.860 --> 00:08:08.900 issues maybe someone's kid is sick maybe 00:08:08.900 --> 00:08:09.950 they're having problems in their 00:08:09.950 --> 00:08:11.780 marriage maybe one of their parents is 00:08:11.780 --> 00:08:14.000 dying we don't know what's going on in 00:08:14.000 --> 00:08:16.070 their lives and of course it will affect 00:08:16.070 --> 00:08:18.650 performance at work empathy is being 00:08:18.650 --> 00:08:21.050 concerned about the human being not just 00:08:21.050 --> 00:08:25.250 their output we have for some reason our 00:08:25.250 --> 00:08:28.070 work world has changed in the past 20 00:08:28.070 --> 00:08:31.310 and 30 years we are suffering the side 00:08:31.310 --> 00:08:34.309 effects of business theories left over 00:08:34.309 --> 00:08:37.580 from the 80s and 90s and they are bad 00:08:37.580 --> 00:08:41.799 for people and they are bad for business 00:08:41.799 --> 00:08:45.110 let me give you an example the concept 00:08:45.110 --> 00:08:48.290 of shareholder supremacy was a theory 00:08:48.290 --> 00:08:52.670 proposed in the late 1970s it was 00:08:52.670 --> 00:08:56.540 popularized in the 80s and 90s it is now 00:08:56.540 --> 00:08:59.680 standard form today you talk to any 00:08:59.680 --> 00:09:01.910 public company and you ask them their 00:09:01.910 --> 00:09:02.990 priority and they say maximize 00:09:02.990 --> 00:09:04.050 shareholder value 00:09:04.050 --> 00:09:07.149 really that's like a coach prioritizing 00:09:07.149 --> 00:09:09.130 the needs of the fans over the needs of 00:09:09.130 --> 00:09:10.870 the players how you gonna build a 00:09:10.870 --> 00:09:13.089 winning team with that model but that's 00:09:13.089 --> 00:09:14.860 normal today we don't even perceive it 00:09:14.860 --> 00:09:16.870 as broken or damaged or wrong or 00:09:16.870 --> 00:09:20.410 outdated remember the 80s and 90s were 00:09:20.410 --> 00:09:23.980 boom years with relative peace and a 00:09:23.980 --> 00:09:25.959 kinder gentler cold war nobody was 00:09:25.959 --> 00:09:28.029 practicing hiding under their desks in 00:09:28.029 --> 00:09:31.569 school anymore we are no longer in those 00:09:31.569 --> 00:09:34.209 times these are no longer boom years 00:09:34.209 --> 00:09:36.850 these are no longer peaceful times and 00:09:36.850 --> 00:09:39.569 those models cannot work today 00:09:39.569 --> 00:09:45.370 here's another one mass layoffs using 00:09:45.370 --> 00:09:47.860 someone's livelihood to balance the 00:09:47.860 --> 00:09:51.009 books right it's so normal in America 00:09:51.009 --> 00:09:53.319 today that we don't even understand how 00:09:53.319 --> 00:09:55.630 broken and how damaging it is not only 00:09:55.630 --> 00:09:58.089 to human beings but to business you know 00:09:58.089 --> 00:09:59.410 companies talk about how they want to 00:09:59.410 --> 00:10:00.610 build trust in cooperation then they 00:10:00.610 --> 00:10:02.139 announce a round of layoffs do you know 00:10:02.139 --> 00:10:04.300 the quickest way to destroy trust and 00:10:04.300 --> 00:10:06.009 destroy cooperation in a business 00:10:06.009 --> 00:10:09.399 literally in one day lay people off and 00:10:09.399 --> 00:10:12.189 everyone gets scared all right can you 00:10:12.189 --> 00:10:14.199 imagine sending someone home to say 00:10:14.199 --> 00:10:15.850 honey I can no longer provide for our 00:10:15.850 --> 00:10:17.439 family because the company missed its 00:10:17.439 --> 00:10:20.769 arbitrary projections this year and 00:10:20.769 --> 00:10:22.149 forget about the people who lost their 00:10:22.149 --> 00:10:24.160 job think about the people who kept 00:10:24.160 --> 00:10:26.290 their jobs because every single decision 00:10:26.290 --> 00:10:27.790 a company makes as a piece of 00:10:27.790 --> 00:10:29.829 communication and the company cut the 00:10:29.829 --> 00:10:31.750 company has just communicated to 00:10:31.750 --> 00:10:34.350 everybody else this is not a meritocracy 00:10:34.350 --> 00:10:37.060 we don't care how hard you work or how 00:10:37.060 --> 00:10:39.550 long you've worked here if we miss our 00:10:39.550 --> 00:10:41.199 numbers and you happen to fall on the 00:10:41.199 --> 00:10:44.290 wrong side of the spreadsheet I'm sorry 00:10:44.290 --> 00:10:46.420 we cannot guarantee employment in other 00:10:46.420 --> 00:10:48.490 words we come to work every day afraid 00:10:48.490 --> 00:10:51.579 and we're asking our youngest generation 00:10:51.579 --> 00:10:53.470 to work in environments where how would 00:10:53.470 --> 00:10:56.110 any of us ever stand up and admit I made 00:10:56.110 --> 00:10:58.480 a mistake we're constantly being told 00:10:58.480 --> 00:11:00.310 you has to be vulnerable leaders are 00:11:00.310 --> 00:11:02.079 vulnerable what does that even mean it 00:11:02.079 --> 00:11:03.950 doesn't mean you walk around crying I'm 00:11:03.950 --> 00:11:07.820 honorable right know what vulnerability 00:11:07.820 --> 00:11:09.290 means as you create an environment in 00:11:09.290 --> 00:11:11.810 which someone feels safe enough to raise 00:11:11.810 --> 00:11:14.120 their hand and said I don't know what 00:11:14.120 --> 00:11:14.840 I'm doing 00:11:14.840 --> 00:11:17.030 you've given me a job and I haven't been 00:11:17.030 --> 00:11:20.420 trained to do it I need help I made a 00:11:20.420 --> 00:11:23.930 mistake I screwed something up I'm 00:11:23.930 --> 00:11:24.710 scared 00:11:24.710 --> 00:11:27.440 I'm worried all of these things no one 00:11:27.440 --> 00:11:29.390 would ever admit inside a company 00:11:29.390 --> 00:11:31.310 because it puts a target on your head in 00:11:31.310 --> 00:11:33.950 case there's another round and so we 00:11:33.950 --> 00:11:35.600 keep it to ourselves and how can a 00:11:35.600 --> 00:11:37.760 company ever do well if nobody's ever 00:11:37.760 --> 00:11:38.870 willing to admit they made a mistake 00:11:38.870 --> 00:11:40.460 that's scared or they don't know what 00:11:40.460 --> 00:11:42.140 they're doing and so we've literally 00:11:42.140 --> 00:11:43.730 created cultures in which every single 00:11:43.730 --> 00:11:45.320 day everybody comes to work and liya hai 00:11:45.320 --> 00:11:49.130 lies hides and fakes and we're asking 00:11:49.130 --> 00:11:51.740 our youngest generation to work and 00:11:51.740 --> 00:11:54.170 succeed and find themselves and build 00:11:54.170 --> 00:11:56.330 their confidence and overcome their 00:11:56.330 --> 00:11:58.520 addiction to technology and build strong 00:11:58.520 --> 00:12:00.590 relationships at work we're asking to do 00:12:00.590 --> 00:12:01.850 this and these lis environments we've 00:12:01.850 --> 00:12:04.550 created we keep saying to them you're 00:12:04.550 --> 00:12:08.680 the future leaders we're the leaders now 00:12:08.680 --> 00:12:14.660 we're in control what are we doing this 00:12:14.660 --> 00:12:17.210 is what empathy means it means if 00:12:17.210 --> 00:12:19.520 there's an entire generation struggling 00:12:19.520 --> 00:12:22.580 maybe it's not them it's like you know 00:12:22.580 --> 00:12:25.040 the only thing that I that the common 00:12:25.040 --> 00:12:29.620 factor in all my failed relationships me 00:12:29.620 --> 00:12:32.480 same thing Oh II just can't get the 00:12:32.480 --> 00:12:33.440 right Act or you know the right 00:12:33.440 --> 00:12:35.390 performance out of our people maybe it's 00:12:35.390 --> 00:12:39.560 you right it's not a generation it's not 00:12:39.560 --> 00:12:41.930 them they're not difficult or hard to 00:12:41.930 --> 00:12:44.330 understand they're human beings like the 00:12:44.330 --> 00:12:45.980 rest of us trying to find their way 00:12:45.980 --> 00:12:48.260 trying to work in a place where they 00:12:48.260 --> 00:12:50.750 feel that someone cares about them as a 00:12:50.750 --> 00:12:53.840 human being by the way that's what we 00:12:53.840 --> 00:12:57.110 all want in other words it's not even 00:12:57.110 --> 00:13:01.040 generational it's all of us this is the 00:13:01.040 --> 00:13:02.840 practice of empathy that if we're 00:13:02.840 --> 00:13:04.910 struggling to communicate to someone if 00:13:04.910 --> 00:13:06.890 it's struggling to help someone be at 00:13:06.890 --> 00:13:09.140 their natural best I'm tired of people 00:13:09.140 --> 00:13:10.610 saying to me how do I get the best out 00:13:10.610 --> 00:13:12.050 of my people really that's what you want 00:13:12.050 --> 00:13:13.880 they're like a towel just lingam how can 00:13:13.880 --> 00:13:16.880 I get the most out of them 00:13:16.880 --> 00:13:18.530 No how do I help my people be at their 00:13:18.530 --> 00:13:21.680 natural best right we're not asking 00:13:21.680 --> 00:13:22.760 these questions we are not practicing 00:13:22.760 --> 00:13:23.330 empathy 00:13:23.330 --> 00:13:25.250 we have to start by practicing empathy 00:13:25.250 --> 00:13:27.410 and relate to what they may be going 00:13:27.410 --> 00:13:29.240 through and it will profoundly change 00:13:29.240 --> 00:13:30.710 the decisions we make it will profoundly 00:13:30.710 --> 00:13:34.300 change the way we see the world 00:13:34.300 --> 00:13:37.190 someone's driving to work you're driving 00:13:37.190 --> 00:13:39.020 to work and someone wants to cut into 00:13:39.020 --> 00:13:41.180 your lane what do you do if you pull 00:13:41.180 --> 00:13:44.150 your car up would you let them in most 00:13:44.150 --> 00:13:45.680 of us pull our cars up and go like this 00:13:45.680 --> 00:13:49.100 you wait your turn now let's practice 00:13:49.100 --> 00:13:50.600 empathy I don't know maybe they've been 00:13:50.600 --> 00:13:52.040 out of work for six months maybe they 00:13:52.040 --> 00:13:53.300 had trouble getting the kids out to 00:13:53.300 --> 00:13:54.410 school this morning and now they're 00:13:54.410 --> 00:13:56.180 running late for a really important 00:13:56.180 --> 00:13:57.680 interview and they just have to get to 00:13:57.680 --> 00:13:58.910 this interview and they're gonna cut 00:13:58.910 --> 00:14:01.580 into our lane or maybe they're just a 00:14:01.580 --> 00:14:07.070 bastard I don't know but that's the 00:14:07.070 --> 00:14:11.030 point we don't know we don't know and 00:14:11.030 --> 00:14:13.370 the practice of empathy will say I'll 00:14:13.370 --> 00:14:17.060 let them in and I'll arrive to work one 00:14:17.060 --> 00:14:20.840 car lengths late right we don't always 00:14:20.840 --> 00:14:23.660 have to be right we do always have to be 00:14:23.660 --> 00:14:25.910 in charge we don't have to be the one 00:14:25.910 --> 00:14:27.920 who succeeds it's not about winning or 00:14:27.920 --> 00:14:30.290 losing and that's where I go to the 00:14:30.290 --> 00:14:33.490 second point after empathy comes 00:14:33.490 --> 00:14:36.350 perspective where it's not about winning 00:14:36.350 --> 00:14:41.240 or losing in game theory there are two 00:14:41.240 --> 00:14:43.340 kinds of games there are finite games 00:14:43.340 --> 00:14:45.890 and there are infinite games and this is 00:14:45.890 --> 00:14:47.230 how you're gonna change your perspective 00:14:47.230 --> 00:14:51.110 right a finite game is defined as known 00:14:51.110 --> 00:14:54.200 players fixed rules and an agreed upon 00:14:54.200 --> 00:14:58.160 objective baseball for example we know 00:14:58.160 --> 00:14:59.690 the rules we all agree to the rules and 00:14:59.690 --> 00:15:01.790 whoever has more runs at the end of nine 00:15:01.790 --> 00:15:03.350 innings is the winner and the game is 00:15:03.350 --> 00:15:05.210 over no one ever says if we can just 00:15:05.210 --> 00:15:06.680 play two more innings I know we can come 00:15:06.680 --> 00:15:09.470 back doesn't work that way the game is 00:15:09.470 --> 00:15:12.560 over right that's a finite game then you 00:15:12.560 --> 00:15:15.110 have an infinite game infinite games are 00:15:15.110 --> 00:15:18.800 defined as known and unknown players the 00:15:18.800 --> 00:15:21.710 rules are changeable and the objective 00:15:21.710 --> 00:15:24.170 is to keep the game in play to 00:15:24.170 --> 00:15:26.990 perpetuate the game when you pit a 00:15:26.990 --> 00:15:28.790 finite player versus a finite player 00:15:28.790 --> 00:15:30.920 this system is 00:15:30.920 --> 00:15:34.910 baseball is stable right when you pit an 00:15:34.910 --> 00:15:36.710 infant an infinite player versus an 00:15:36.710 --> 00:15:38.660 infinite player this system is also 00:15:38.660 --> 00:15:40.760 stable like the Cold War for example 00:15:40.760 --> 00:15:42.890 because there cannot be a winner and a 00:15:42.890 --> 00:15:44.600 loser there are no winners and losers in 00:15:44.600 --> 00:15:46.850 an infinite game right it doesn't exist 00:15:46.850 --> 00:15:48.650 and because there are no winners or 00:15:48.650 --> 00:15:50.210 losers what ends up happening in the 00:15:50.210 --> 00:15:52.640 infinite contest is players drop out 00:15:52.640 --> 00:15:54.830 when they run out of the will or the 00:15:54.830 --> 00:15:57.230 resources to play but there's no winners 00:15:57.230 --> 00:16:01.220 or losers problems arise when you pit a 00:16:01.220 --> 00:16:03.110 finite player versus an infinite player 00:16:03.110 --> 00:16:05.000 because the finite players playing to 00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:07.460 win and an infinite player is to playing 00:16:07.460 --> 00:16:09.830 to keep the game going right this is 00:16:09.830 --> 00:16:11.720 what happened to us in Vietnam we were 00:16:11.720 --> 00:16:14.030 playing to win and the Vietnamese were 00:16:14.030 --> 00:16:16.340 fighting for their lives we were the 00:16:16.340 --> 00:16:18.140 ones who got stuck in quagmire this is 00:16:18.140 --> 00:16:20.180 the Soviet Union in Afghanistan they 00:16:20.180 --> 00:16:22.130 were trying to beat the Mujahideen and 00:16:22.130 --> 00:16:23.690 the Mujahideen would fight for as long 00:16:23.690 --> 00:16:27.170 as is necessary quagmire now let's look 00:16:27.170 --> 00:16:31.130 at business the game of business has 00:16:31.130 --> 00:16:32.960 pre-existed or has existed long before 00:16:32.960 --> 00:16:35.030 every single company that exists on this 00:16:35.030 --> 00:16:38.480 planet today and it will outlast every 00:16:38.480 --> 00:16:40.370 single company that it lives that exists 00:16:40.370 --> 00:16:42.920 on this planet today there's no winning 00:16:42.920 --> 00:16:45.290 the game of business and the reason is 00:16:45.290 --> 00:16:46.820 is because we haven't agreed to the 00:16:46.820 --> 00:16:49.850 rules I get such a kick out of this you 00:16:49.850 --> 00:16:51.470 realize how many companies actually 00:16:51.470 --> 00:16:53.720 don't know the game they're in right 00:16:53.720 --> 00:16:55.040 listen to the language of the companies 00:16:55.040 --> 00:16:56.750 use we're trying to beat our competition 00:16:56.750 --> 00:16:59.300 we're trying to be number one did you 00:16:59.300 --> 00:17:00.980 know that we were ranked number one look 00:17:00.980 --> 00:17:03.339 at the listing based on what criteria 00:17:03.339 --> 00:17:05.959 revenues profits market share square 00:17:05.959 --> 00:17:08.030 footage number of employees based on 00:17:08.030 --> 00:17:09.920 what time frame a quarter a year five 00:17:09.920 --> 00:17:11.689 years ten years 20 years 50 years 100 00:17:11.689 --> 00:17:13.310 years I haven't agreed to those 00:17:13.310 --> 00:17:15.140 standards how can you declare yourself 00:17:15.140 --> 00:17:15.980 the winner 00:17:15.980 --> 00:17:17.720 how can you declare yourself number one 00:17:17.720 --> 00:17:19.579 where no one else in the game has agreed 00:17:19.579 --> 00:17:23.630 to the rules it's arbitrary there is no 00:17:23.630 --> 00:17:27.230 winning because there's no end in other 00:17:27.230 --> 00:17:29.720 words companies are playing finite games 00:17:29.720 --> 00:17:31.820 listen to their language they're trying 00:17:31.820 --> 00:17:33.710 to beat their competition what does that 00:17:33.710 --> 00:17:37.280 even mean it's the leaders and the 00:17:37.280 --> 00:17:38.840 companies that understand the game that 00:17:38.840 --> 00:17:40.550 they're in and organize their resources 00:17:40.550 --> 00:17:42.120 and their decision making 00:17:42.120 --> 00:17:44.630 the infinite contest that outlast and 00:17:44.630 --> 00:17:47.940 frustrate their competition all the 00:17:47.940 --> 00:17:49.470 companies that we've referred to as the 00:17:49.470 --> 00:17:52.500 exceptions Southwest Airlines Apple 00:17:52.500 --> 00:17:55.290 computers harley-davidson they're the 00:17:55.290 --> 00:17:57.360 exception no they're playing the 00:17:57.360 --> 00:17:59.910 infinite contest they frustrate their 00:17:59.910 --> 00:18:03.150 competition is what happens that's what 00:18:03.150 --> 00:18:04.440 happens because they're not playing to 00:18:04.440 --> 00:18:05.450 win 00:18:05.450 --> 00:18:08.520 Jim Senegal the founder of Costco which 00:18:08.520 --> 00:18:10.050 is the company only real company that 00:18:10.050 --> 00:18:11.490 gives Walmart a run for its money 00:18:11.490 --> 00:18:13.940 he says public companies are looking to 00:18:13.940 --> 00:18:15.870 succeed for the quarter says we're 00:18:15.870 --> 00:18:17.400 looking for the next 50 years you can 00:18:17.400 --> 00:18:18.870 hear him he's playing the infinite 00:18:18.870 --> 00:18:22.610 contest I spoke at a Leadership Summit 00:18:22.610 --> 00:18:25.890 for Microsoft I also spoke at a 00:18:25.890 --> 00:18:28.740 Leadership Summit for Apple now at the 00:18:28.740 --> 00:18:31.140 Microsoft summit I would say 70% of the 00:18:31.140 --> 00:18:33.030 executives and this was under the Steve 00:18:33.030 --> 00:18:35.429 Ballmer days I would say about 70% of 00:18:35.429 --> 00:18:38.220 the executives spend about 70% of their 00:18:38.220 --> 00:18:40.830 presentations talking about how to beat 00:18:40.830 --> 00:18:45.720 Apple at the Apple Summit a hundred 00:18:45.720 --> 00:18:47.429 percent of the executives spent a 00:18:47.429 --> 00:18:48.870 hundred percent of their presentations 00:18:48.870 --> 00:18:51.030 talking about how to help teachers teach 00:18:51.030 --> 00:18:53.700 and how to help students learn one was 00:18:53.700 --> 00:18:56.010 obsessed with their competition the 00:18:56.010 --> 00:18:57.390 other one was obsessed with where 00:18:57.390 --> 00:18:59.550 they're going so at the end of my 00:18:59.550 --> 00:19:03.120 presentation at Microsoft they gave me a 00:19:03.120 --> 00:19:05.370 gift they gave me the new Zune which was 00:19:05.370 --> 00:19:07.230 the competitor to the iPod touch when it 00:19:07.230 --> 00:19:09.450 was a thing right and I have to tell you 00:19:09.450 --> 00:19:12.320 this piece of technology was spectacular 00:19:12.320 --> 00:19:15.540 it was beautiful the user interface was 00:19:15.540 --> 00:19:18.000 incredible the design was amazing it was 00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:20.220 intuitive it was one of the most 00:19:20.220 --> 00:19:21.840 beautiful elegant pieces of technology 00:19:21.840 --> 00:19:24.390 I'd ever seen right now they didn't work 00:19:24.390 --> 00:19:25.710 with iTunes which is an entirely 00:19:25.710 --> 00:19:29.179 different problem I couldn't use it 00:19:30.980 --> 00:19:36.450 but that's something else I'm sitting in 00:19:36.450 --> 00:19:38.370 the back of a taxi with a senior Apple 00:19:38.370 --> 00:19:40.169 executive sort of employee number twelve 00:19:40.169 --> 00:19:43.730 kind of guy and I decide to stir the pot 00:19:43.730 --> 00:19:48.390 and I turned him I say you know I spoke 00:19:48.390 --> 00:19:50.820 at a Microsoft summit and they gave me 00:19:50.820 --> 00:19:53.520 their new Zune and I have to tell you it 00:19:53.520 --> 00:19:57.590 is so much better than your iPod touch 00:19:57.590 --> 00:20:01.890 and he turned to me and said I have no 00:20:01.890 --> 00:20:10.020 doubt conversation over because the 00:20:10.020 --> 00:20:13.530 infinite player isn't playing to be 00:20:13.530 --> 00:20:16.169 number one every day with every product 00:20:16.169 --> 00:20:18.030 they're playing to outlast the 00:20:18.030 --> 00:20:20.190 competition if I had sent to Microsoft 00:20:20.190 --> 00:20:21.600 oh I've got the new iPod touch it's so 00:20:21.600 --> 00:20:22.890 much better than your new Zune there was 00:20:22.890 --> 00:20:24.480 a can we see it what does it do how we 00:20:24.480 --> 00:20:26.789 have to see it because one is obsessed 00:20:26.789 --> 00:20:28.260 with their competition the other is 00:20:28.260 --> 00:20:30.000 obsessed with why they do what they do 00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:31.890 the other is obsessed with where they're 00:20:31.890 --> 00:20:34.380 going and the reason Apple frustrates 00:20:34.380 --> 00:20:35.970 their competition is because secretly 00:20:35.970 --> 00:20:38.159 they're not even competing against them 00:20:38.159 --> 00:20:40.590 they're competing against themselves and 00:20:40.590 --> 00:20:43.470 they understand that sometimes you're a 00:20:43.470 --> 00:20:45.480 little bit ahead and sometimes you're a 00:20:45.480 --> 00:20:47.520 little bit behind and sometimes your 00:20:47.520 --> 00:20:49.770 product is better and sometimes you're 00:20:49.770 --> 00:20:51.929 not but if you wake up every single 00:20:51.929 --> 00:20:54.929 morning and compete against yourself how 00:20:54.929 --> 00:20:56.730 do I make our products better than they 00:20:56.730 --> 00:20:58.679 were yesterday how do I take care of our 00:20:58.679 --> 00:21:00.150 customers better than we did yesterday 00:21:00.150 --> 00:21:02.250 how do we advance our cause more 00:21:02.250 --> 00:21:05.010 efficiently more productively than we 00:21:05.010 --> 00:21:06.690 did yesterday how do we find new 00:21:06.690 --> 00:21:08.880 solutions to advance our calling our 00:21:08.880 --> 00:21:10.830 cause our purpose our beliefs are why 00:21:10.830 --> 00:21:12.870 every single day what you'll find is 00:21:12.870 --> 00:21:16.950 over time you will probably be ahead 00:21:16.950 --> 00:21:19.230 more often those who play the infinite 00:21:19.230 --> 00:21:20.760 game understand it's not about the 00:21:20.760 --> 00:21:23.880 battle it's about the war and they don't 00:21:23.880 --> 00:21:27.480 play to win every day and they frustrate 00:21:27.480 --> 00:21:29.010 their competition until their 00:21:29.010 --> 00:21:31.200 competition drops out of the game every 00:21:31.200 --> 00:21:33.210 single bankruptcy almost every merger 00:21:33.210 --> 00:21:35.130 and acquisition is basically a company 00:21:35.130 --> 00:21:36.720 saying we no longer have the will or the 00:21:36.720 --> 00:21:38.549 resources to continue to play and we 00:21:38.549 --> 00:21:39.990 have no choice to either drop out of the 00:21:39.990 --> 00:21:40.809 game or 00:21:40.809 --> 00:21:42.519 or merge our resources with another 00:21:42.519 --> 00:21:44.259 player so that we can stay in the game 00:21:44.259 --> 00:21:46.570 that's what that is and if you think 00:21:46.570 --> 00:21:47.769 about the number of bankruptcies and 00:21:47.769 --> 00:21:49.539 mergers and acquisitions it's kind of 00:21:49.539 --> 00:21:51.669 proof that most companies don't even 00:21:51.669 --> 00:21:54.309 know the game they're in you want to be 00:21:54.309 --> 00:21:56.259 a great leader start with empathy you 00:21:56.259 --> 00:21:58.899 want to be a great leader change your 00:21:58.899 --> 00:22:01.149 perspective and play the game you're 00:22:01.149 --> 00:22:06.509 actually playing thank you very much 00:22:07.080 --> 00:22:10.250 [Applause]