OSCAR: Who goes there?
You'll like it.
Old Nasty Dan was the meanest man I ever knew.
He'd stomp and scream and be real mean the whole day through.
OSCAR: Yeah?
He'd frown a bunch, he ate nails for lunch and he'd never laugh.
OSCAR: Well, I'd like him.
He'd growl and yell and I heard tell he never took a bath.
Nasty Dan, was a nasty man.
OSCAR: Yeah?
Hard to understand, that Nasty Dan.
Now, Nasty Dan was a nasty man the whole day long.
OSCAR: Good for him.
He'd go where he could and he'd try real good to make
things go wrong.
He'd jump for joy when a little boy
would trip and fall.
OSCAR: Really mean.
And the only words that he ever said were, "I don't like
you at all."
OSCAR: Yeah, right on!
Nasty Dan was a nasty man.
Hard to understand, that Nasty Dan.
Now here's the best part.
It's about a girl named Nasty Pearl.
OSCAR: Oh, she sounds OK, too.
Nasty Pearl was a nasty girl who met Dan somehow.
She said, "You're like me, rotten as can be.
Let's get married now." So they went and they did and had
a nasty kid, and I must confess, that Dan pretty much
leaves everybody alone now and he doesn't bother anybody
anymore, because he just lives in his nasty ol' house with
his nasty ol' wife--
OSCAR: Yeah?
--and his nasty kid--
OSCAR: Yeah?
--in nasty happiness.
OSCAR: Far out!
Nasty Dan, he's a happy man.
Hard to understand, that Nasty Dan.
OSCAR: Wow. That was really great!
You like that?
OSCAR: And say, aren't you Johnny Trash?
Cash.
OSCAR: Cash, Cash.
Have a rotten day.
OSCAR: Wow. There goes my kind of guy.