1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,250
Even if you don't understand, you can 
always support us and be with us.

2
00:00:03,250 --> 00:00:03,500
Our identity is real and it exists.

3
00:00:06,747 --> 00:00:11,340
My name is Camille, I'm 22 years old.

4
00:00:11,340 --> 00:00:13,530
I'm non-binary and I'm here to talk to 
you about nonbinarity.

5
00:00:13,530 --> 00:00:17,830
Nonbinarity is an umbrella term that 
includes all the gender identities

6
00:00:17,830 --> 00:00:21,410
that are neither completely masculine 
nor completely feminine.

7
00:00:21,420 --> 00:00:25,321
That could be agender, where "a" means 
without, which is neutral,

8
00:00:25,321 --> 00:00:29,742
or it could be all the gender fluid
identities, including those

9
00:00:29,859 --> 00:00:33,000
who are gender fluid, demigendered, 
pangendered , and so on.

10
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
If you imagine gender as a spectrum 
with two poles - masculine and feminine -

11
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and a cursor that could be 
anywhere between them,

12
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
it would include all of 
those gender identities.

13
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I never really identified with femininity
and when I was 18,

14
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I'd aleady started to question my own 
gender identity.

15
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I met a trans man I was with for awhile 
and together, we found the words

16
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
for my identity, which was non-binary. And
because he knew more about it than I did,

17
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
he helped me find the words for
my gender identity.

18
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Gender identity, it's who you are, the
gender that you feel, that you try out.

19
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And gender expression is what you 
show to others.

20
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
It's the way you express your identity.

21
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So you can have, for example, a masculine
gender identity, so you're a man.

22
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
But your gender expression could
be female

23
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
with lots of markers that our society 
considers to be feminine.

24
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
For example Bilal Hissani, who is a man
with a female gender expression.

25
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I told my parents I was non-binary and at
the same time,

26
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that I also wanted to change 
my first name.

27
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I was 20 years old so it was 2 years 
ago and my my mom took it very well.

28
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She was already totally up to speed 
about questions of gender.

29
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She had deconstructed the issues and
I felt very safe, very secure with her.

30
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
My dad, it was a little more delicate.
I took more time to talk to him about it.

31
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And in fact I didn't actually do that -

32
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I sent him a message because it was easier
for me to handle. And he reacted well.

33
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
He said he didn't understand everything 
but he'd always be there to support me,

34
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and it that it didn't change anything for 
him, he loved me just as much.

35
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
For my grandmother, it was less obvious
because the concept was foreign to her.

36
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She grew up in the country, 
then went to Paris.

37
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She was with my grandfather for 50 years
and was very much cis-heteronormative,

38
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
where she never questioned her 
identity or that of others.

39
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So when I talked to her about it, 
she was a bit shocked,

40
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
but she always did the best she 
could with me.

41
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She tried really hard. She almost always 
got my first name right.

42
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I'd made a request to change my first name
in 2019, through my town's city hall.

43
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I filled out an application form with
statements from my family and friends

44
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
saying that they called me Cami
when they talked to me.

45
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I asked my school to write a letter
of support, and so on.

46
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Next, I submitted the application, 
and waited a few months.

47
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
The time varies from city to city,

48
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
but my request to change my name
was accepted.

49
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
To misgender someone is to speak to them
using the wrong pronouns,

50
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and this assigns a gender 
to a non-binary person

51
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
who would have explicitly said
to use neutral pronouns like "iel".

52
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And instead people use pronouns that 
identify them as feminine or masculine.

53
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Personally, I use feminine pronouns in 
speaking and neutral pronouns in writing.

54
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
l usually tell people up front that 
I prefer they use feminine pronouns

55
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
when they speak to me.
If they don't do that on their own

56
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and you want to be sure that you
indentify their gender correctly,

57
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
you can ask them their pronouns or 
wait until they identify their gender

58
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
so you can follow their lead.

59
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
In the videos I made earlier, 
there were a lot of comments

60
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that invalidated our identities, that 
denied our gender expressions

61
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and our gender identities. After, I read
very few of those comments because I know

62
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
they're usually malicious or very
insensitive. And they just bring me pain.

63
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I've already taken part in a report where
you could hear that it's just a fad,

64
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that it appeared a few years ago.
In the United States, about 10 years ago.

65
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
It was related to fashion, like 
unisex fashion and so on.

66
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
That's completely false and I also think

67
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
it's a point of view that's totally 
white and absolutely Eurocentric.

68
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Because in so many cultures, there are

69
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
several gender identities that were 
completely erased during colonisation.

70
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Often enough, we hear it's problematic or
awkward to create more and more categories

71
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
for people to self identify and re-self 
identify. But I think it's so important,

72
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
in the first place, to be able to self 
identify with something in order to

73
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
de-self identify with an identity 
that was arbitrarily assigned.

74
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And I think it's also necessary to find a
community, to create a link,

75
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to know we're not alone, that there's
support, that there are other people

76
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
who are like us, who understand us, 
who listen to us.

77
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
If I have only one thing to say, it would
be that even if you don't understand,

78
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
you can always support us and be with us.
You can learn.

79
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
You can deconstruct your 
patterns of thought.

80
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
You can help your friends and family, 
even if you don't entirely understand

81
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
the impact of what their gender
means to them.

82
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
A second thing is that all non-binary 
people have different ways

83
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
of expressing their identity.

84
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Some will have medical transitions, 
some will take hormones,

85
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
have operations, other things. And
no matter how they transition or not,

86
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
socially, medically and so on,
our identity is legitimate and it exists.

87
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And there are many of us.