0:00:00.000,0:00:01.670
Even if you don't understand

0:00:01.670,0:00:03.814
You can still[br]support and standy by us.

0:00:03.814,0:00:06.149
Our Identity is real[br]and it exists

0:00:06.149,0:00:09.029
(Non-Binary Stories)

0:00:09.029,0:00:11.560
My name is Cami, I'm 22 years old,[br]I am non-binary,

0:00:11.560,0:00:13.521
and i'm here to explain[br]non-binary to you.

0:00:13.521,0:00:15.245
Non-binary, [br]is an umbrella term

0:00:15.245,0:00:16.980
which includes[br]all gender identities

0:00:16.980,0:00:18.975
that are neither[br]exclusively male

0:00:18.975,0:00:20.698
or exclusively female.

0:00:20.698,0:00:23.518
It can be agender, [br]the "a" meaning a subtraction

0:00:23.518,0:00:25.269
of gender [br]or gender neutrality

0:00:25.269,0:00:27.451
or it can include[br]all fluid identities.

0:00:27.460,0:00:31.000
Like if we imagine gender[br]as a spectrum with two poles,

0:00:31.000,0:00:32.350
male and female.

0:00:32.350,0:00:34.612
You can have a moving cursor

0:00:34.612,0:00:36.784
that includes all people[br]who are gender fluid,

0:00:36.784,0:00:39.188
demi-gender, pangender, etc.

0:00:39.470,0:00:41.865
I've never really identified[br]with femininity.

0:00:42.390,0:00:45.164
At 18 years old, I already started

0:00:45.164,0:00:47.494
to ask questions[br]on my gender identity

0:00:47.776,0:00:49.626
and I met a trans man

0:00:49.626,0:00:51.529
With whom I'd been with for a while,

0:00:51.529,0:00:54.570
and together we were able define[br]my identity

0:00:54.570,0:00:56.072
which was non-binary.

0:00:56.072,0:00:57.689
and I think it was due to him

0:00:57.689,0:00:59.366
having way more [br]information than me

0:00:59.366,0:01:03.070
that helped me find the words [br]to explain my identity.

0:01:03.389,0:01:05.453
Gender identity is about who you are,

0:01:05.453,0:01:06.791
the gender we feel,

0:01:06.791,0:01:08.904
that we live in, [br]that we experience,

0:01:08.904,0:01:12.947
and gender expression,[br]is what we show to others.

0:01:12.947,0:01:15.645
It's how we express this our identity.

0:01:15.730,0:01:18.000
It's possible to have a gender identity,

0:01:18.000,0:01:19.599
that's for example, male,

0:01:19.699,0:01:21.029
you are a man,

0:01:21.029,0:01:25.181
and then have a gender expression

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that is feminine[br]with many markers

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
society considers feminine.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Like for example,[br]Bilal Hassan, is a man

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
with a feminine gender expression.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I came out to my parent[br]as non-binary

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and that I wanted[br]to change my pronouns

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
at the same time.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I was 20, it was two years ago.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
My mom took it well.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She was already well-versed in gender issues

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She was quite casual and very safe,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I felt safe.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
With my father, [br]it was little trickier

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
it took me a little longer [br]to tell him

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and i didn't do it in person.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I sent him a text

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Because it was easier[br]for me to handle.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
He reacted fairly well.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
He said that[br]he didn't understand it all,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
but that in any case[br]he'd be there for me

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and that it changes nothing [br]for him

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and that he loved me all the same.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
For my grandma, it wasn't as simple

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
as it was something [br]very unfamiliar for her.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She grew up in the countryside,[br]later moving to Paris.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She lived with my grandpa for 50 years.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She was in very [br]cis-heteronormative social spaces

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
where she never had questioned [br]her identity

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
or the identity of others.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
When I told her,[br]she was a bit taken aback,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
but she always made sure and insisted that

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She would act in the best way[br]she could with me.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She puts in a lot of effort

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
She is hardly ever wrong anymore

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
in using my preferred pronouns.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I ma de a request to change[br]my first name in 2019

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I filed a request

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to the town hall of where I lived.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I took a dossier[br]which i had to fill with

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
with testimonies [br]from those closest to me

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to say that they were using[br]the first name Cami

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to address me.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I asked my school[br]to write me a letter of support.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Then I submitted my application.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I had to wait a few months,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
it differs by town hall.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
And I received approval [br]to change my first name.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
The act of misgendering someone

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
entails addressing this person

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
with the wrong pronouns,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Therefore, gendering[br]a non-binary person

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
who has explicitly said

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
use neutral pronouns[br]like "iel" --(they?)

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and or gendering them[br]as male or female.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Me personally,[br]I use feminine pronouns

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
when in conversation[br]and neutral when written.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
But it's true that in general[br]I have a tendency to immediately verbalize

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that I prefer to be addressed[br]with female pronouns.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
After, if the person[br]doesn't say their own

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and you want to be sure[br]in gendering them correctly

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
you can ask for their pronouns

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
or wait for the person [br]to gender themselves in front of you

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
so you follow their pronouns.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
In my older videos,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
There was lots of comments

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that invalidated our identities,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
denied our expressed gender[br]and our gender identity.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Afterwards, I read very few[br]of these comments

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
simply because I know[br]for the most part,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
They are malicious[br]or very, very ignorant

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and they will only cause me grief.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I was participated in a report (study?)[br]in which it was said

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that it was just a phase,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that it has just emerged [br]in the United States over the last few years

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that it was connected to fashion,[br]unisex fashion, etc.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
That is completely false.[br]I also think it's

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
a super white[br]and eurocentric point of view

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
because, in many cultures

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
there are many genders

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that were totally erased

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
through colonization, [br]to put it simply.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
So often, we hear[br]that this is problematic

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and it's uncomfortable to put people[br]in positions to identify, reidentify yourself, etc.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
but I think it's super important

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to be able to choose in the first place[br]how we identify with something,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to unidentify with an identity

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
thats was assigned to us [br]at random (arbitrarily).

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I also think it's necessary[br]to build a community,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to create a connection, [br]to know you're not alone,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that there is support,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that there are other people[br]who are just like us,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
who understand us, [br]who listens to us.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
If I could only say one thing,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I think it would be[br]that even if you don't understand,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
you can alway support and stand by us.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
You can learn[br]you can deconstruct your ideologies,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
You can relearn,[br]you can help those close to you

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
even if you don't completely understand

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
the entire scope[br]of their gender identity.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
A second thing, [br]is that all no-binary people

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
have a unique way[br]of expressing their identity,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
There are people[br]who will do medical transitions,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
those who will take hormones,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
those who will have operations,[br]others who won't

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and that the method of transition or not

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
whether socially, medically, etc. does not matter

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Our identity remains legitimate[br]It exists

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and there is many of us,[br]so many.