0:00:00.000,0:00:01.370
Even if you don't understand

0:00:01.370,0:00:03.560
you can always support and assist us.

0:00:03.560,0:00:05.198
Our identity remain legitimate

0:00:05.198,0:00:06.488
and it exists.

0:00:09.183,0:00:10.847
My name is Cami, I'm 22 years old,

0:00:10.847,0:00:11.567
I'm non-binary

0:00:11.567,0:00:13.417
and I'm here to talk about my identity

0:00:13.417,0:00:15.147
'Non-binary' is an umbrella term

0:00:15.147,0:00:17.649
that includes all the identities that are

0:00:17.649,0:00:20.467
neither exclusively masculine nor feminine

0:00:20.467,0:00:22.817
That could be agender, with "a" meaning

0:00:22.817,0:00:24.357
a subtraction without gender.

0:00:24.357,0:00:26.517
Which is neutral. Or it can be all

0:00:26.517,0:00:29.588
the fluid identities, as we imagine gender

0:00:29.588,0:00:31.518
as a spectrum with two poles, masculine

0:00:31.518,0:00:33.498
and feminine. And there is a cursor

0:00:33.498,0:00:35.116
which moves. So all people who are

0:00:35.116,0:00:39.116
genderfluid, demigender, pangender, etc.

0:00:39.245,0:00:41.905
I never really identified with femininity.

0:00:41.905,0:00:45.945
At 18, I started to ask myself questions

0:00:45.945,0:00:48.881
on my gender identity and I met

0:00:48.881,0:00:51.609
a trans man, who I was with for awhile

0:00:51.609,0:00:54.156
and we finally put together some words

0:00:54.156,0:00:56.590
for my identity, so 'non-binary'.

0:00:56.590,0:00:58.813
I think it's because he had more info

0:00:58.813,0:01:02.303
than me. He helped me find the words for

0:01:02.303,0:01:05.023
my identity. Gender identity is what

0:01:05.023,0:01:07.698
we are. It's the gender we feel, our

0:01:07.698,0:01:09.678
lives, and what we experiment with.

0:01:09.678,0:01:12.708
and gender expression is what we present

0:01:12.708,0:01:15.083
to others. It's the way we express

0:01:15.083,0:01:17.813
that identity. You could have a gender

0:01:17.813,0:01:19.943
identity, for example, that's masculine

0:01:19.943,0:01:22.483
so a man, and you can have a gender

0:01:22.483,0:01:24.696
expression that is feminine, with markers

0:01:24.696,0:01:26.536
considered as feminine in society.

0:01:26.536,0:01:28.059
Like for example, Bilal Hassani, he is

0:01:28.059,0:01:30.955
a man with a feminine gender expression.

0:01:31.433,0:01:34.983
I told my parents that I was non binary

0:01:34.983,0:01:37.948
and that I wanted to change my name also.

0:01:37.948,0:01:40.534
I was 20, so two years ago

0:01:40.534,0:01:43.474
and my mom took it quite well.

0:01:43.474,0:01:46.404
She was already up to date with questions

0:01:46.404,0:01:48.840
about gender. She deconstructed them

0:01:48.840,0:01:51.380
and it was safe, I felt secure.

0:01:51.380,0:01:53.610
For my dad, it was a little bit delicate.

0:01:53.610,0:01:55.690
I took more time to talk to him

0:01:55.690,0:01:58.313
and I didn't do it in person. I actually

0:01:58.313,0:02:00.103
sent him a message, as it was easier

0:02:00.103,0:02:03.283
for me to manage. And he took it well.

0:02:03.283,0:02:05.098
He said he didn't understand it all,

0:02:05.098,0:02:06.918
but he would support me regardless

0:02:06.918,0:02:08.686
and that it wouldn't change anything

0:02:08.686,0:02:09.696
he loved me the same.

0:02:09.696,0:02:11.334
For my grandma, it was less clear,

0:02:11.334,0:02:14.564
it's something unfamiliar for her.

0:02:14.564,0:02:16.394
She grew up in the countryside. Then

0:02:16.394,0:02:18.054
she came to Paris. She lived with

0:02:18.054,0:02:20.062
my grandpa for 50 years.

0:02:20.062,0:02:22.341
She lived in very cis heteronormative

0:02:22.341,0:02:24.326
contexts, where she never asked questions

0:02:24.326,0:02:26.136
on her identity or of others.

0:02:26.136,0:02:27.958
So when I talked to her about it, she

0:02:27.958,0:02:30.888
was caught off guard, but she always

0:02:30.888,0:02:33.801
tried her best to behave in the best way

0:02:33.801,0:02:35.771
she can with me. She's make a lot

0:02:35.771,0:02:37.561
of effort, she doesn't make anymore

0:02:37.561,0:02:39.241
mistakes with saying my name now.

0:02:39.241,0:02:41.182
I made an application to chance my name

0:02:41.182,0:02:45.182
in 2019, I submitted the application to

0:02:45.182,0:02:49.182
the city where I was living in. I obtained

0:02:49.182,0:02:51.972
a file that I filled with witnesses from

0:02:51.972,0:02:53.891
my close friends, to show that they use

0:02:53.891,0:02:57.251
the name Cami to refer to me. I asked

0:02:57.251,0:02:59.931
my school to write a letter of support.

0:02:59.931,0:03:02.556
Then, I submitted my file and waited a

0:03:02.556,0:03:04.856
few months. The time span varies according

0:03:04.856,0:03:07.136
to cities. And then I got my name change

0:03:07.136,0:03:08.126
accepted.

0:03:08.126,0:03:09.986
The fact of wrongly gendering someone

0:03:09.986,0:03:12.176
is to address that person while using

0:03:12.176,0:03:14.596
the wrong pronouns. So using gendered

0:03:14.596,0:03:16.561
pronouns for a non-binary person who had

0:03:16.561,0:03:19.231
explicitly said to use neutral pronouns

0:03:19.231,0:03:21.687
like "them" and to gender them using

0:03:21.687,0:03:23.886
feminine or masculine pronouns.

0:03:23.886,0:03:26.246
Personally, I use pronouns referred to

0:03:26.246,0:03:28.546
as "feminine" when speaking and neutral

0:03:28.546,0:03:31.795
in writing. But, in general, I have the

0:03:31.795,0:03:33.829
tendency to say right away that I prefer

0:03:33.829,0:03:36.637
to use feminine pronouns for speaking.

0:03:36.637,0:03:38.297
After, if a person doesn't do that

0:03:38.297,0:03:40.897
for themselves, and you want to be sure

0:03:40.897,0:03:42.697
you are correctly gendering them,

0:03:42.697,0:03:44.584
you can ask them for their pronouns

0:03:44.584,0:03:46.668
or wait until the person refers to

0:03:46.668,0:03:48.598
themselves to follow their suit.

0:03:48.598,0:03:50.618
In the videos that I've done previously

0:03:50.618,0:03:52.783
There was a lot of comments

0:03:52.783,0:03:55.313
which invalidated our identities

0:03:55.313,0:03:58.926
and denied our gender expressions

0:03:58.926,0:04:02.944
and identity. I personally don't read many

0:04:02.944,0:04:05.358
of those comments since I know they are

0:04:05.358,0:04:08.558
mostly malicious or ill-intentioned

0:04:08.558,0:04:10.468
and just want to cause pain.

0:04:10.468,0:04:12.622
I already participated in a report

0:04:12.622,0:04:14.727
where we could hear that it's just

0:04:14.727,0:04:17.347
a trend which came up a few years ago

0:04:17.347,0:04:21.347
in the US, around 10 years ago.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
that it had a connection to fashion also,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and unisex fashion, etc.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
That is completely false, I think that

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
it's also a very white perspective

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and very Eurocentric.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
because in many cultures, we will find

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
many gender identities that were totally

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
erased during colonization.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Oftentimes, we hear that it's problematic

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
or it's annoying to recreate more and more

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
ways to identify ourselves, but I think

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
it is very important to be able to,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
mainly identify as something so

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
to unidentify from an identity that

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
was assigned to us arbitrarily.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
I think it's also necessary to find

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
a community to create connections, to know

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
you're not alone, where there is support,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and where there are others who are like us

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
who know and listen to us.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
If I had one single thing to say, I think

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
it would be that even if you don't

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
understand, you can always support

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
and assist us. You can learn, you can

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
deconstruct your ways of thinking.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
You can educate yourself, you can help

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
your close friends, even if you don't

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
understand their whole gender identity.

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
Another thing, all non-binary people have

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
different ways of expressing their

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
identity, there are some who want to do

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
medicals transitions, take hormones,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
who will do surgery operations, while

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
others won't, but no matter the way you

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
transition or not socially or medically,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
our identities remain legitimate,

9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000
they exist, and there are many of us.