0:00:10.402,0:00:11.618
sweet robes, Obi

0:00:11.618,0:00:13.143
Wan-too-many days in the sun

0:00:13.143,0:00:14.212
stop preaching homie

0:00:14.212,0:00:15.841
teach your flock to covet some fun

0:00:15.841,0:00:17.131
I bring joy every year

0:00:17.131,0:00:18.622
man I represent cheer

0:00:18.622,0:00:19.929
you represent sandals

0:00:19.929,0:00:21.173
and a scraggly beard

0:00:21.173,0:00:22.432
I'm from the North Pole

0:00:22.432,0:00:24.398
that's why my rhymes are so cold

0:00:24.398,0:00:25.317
I spit diamonds

0:00:25.317,0:00:27.084
but I'm serving up some fresh coal

0:00:27.084,0:00:28.501
you been a naughty boy

0:00:28.501,0:00:29.925
you brought a plague of frogs

0:00:29.925,0:00:31.288
you best arrest yourself

0:00:31.288,0:00:32.601
you broke your own law

0:00:32.601,0:00:33.842
or was there something in rule six

0:00:33.842,0:00:35.226
I didn't understand?

0:00:35.226,0:00:36.740
my list says killed Egyptian dude

0:00:36.740,0:00:37.939
buried him in sand

0:00:37.939,0:00:38.890
I read your book

0:00:38.890,0:00:40.282
you got a strict religion

0:00:40.282,0:00:41.406
no bacon?

0:00:41.406,0:00:42.876
but mandatory circumcision

0:00:42.876,0:00:44.206
I'm a jolly bowl a jelly

0:00:44.206,0:00:45.399
giving holiday presents

0:00:45.399,0:00:46.795
but all the chosen people ever get

0:00:46.795,0:00:48.163
for Christmas is jealous

0:00:49.337,0:00:50.733
when I was high upon the mountain

0:00:50.733,0:00:52.315
God revealed the truths of the Earth

0:00:52.315,0:00:53.240
but he never mentioned

0:00:53.240,0:00:54.651
a fat ass Papa Smurf

0:00:54.651,0:00:55.864
it takes nine reindeers

0:00:55.864,0:00:56.954
to haul your fat ass

0:00:56.954,0:00:58.164
you took the Christ outta Christmas

0:00:58.164,0:00:59.476
and just added more mass

0:00:59.476,0:01:00.562
you need to stop breaking

0:01:00.562,0:01:01.605
into houses and creeping

0:01:01.605,0:01:02.948
and peeping on naughty kids

0:01:02.948,0:01:03.672
while they sleeping

0:01:03.672,0:01:05.048
and keep your hands off my stocking

0:01:05.048,0:01:06.258
don't you Ho Ho me

0:01:06.258,0:01:07.845
I'll split your ass in half

0:01:07.845,0:01:09.053
like I did the Red Sea

0:01:09.053,0:01:10.470
you ain't a saint you a slaver

0:01:10.470,0:01:12.035
like a pharaoh in the snow

0:01:12.035,0:01:13.679
stop with the unpaid labor

0:01:13.679,0:01:15.222
and let my little people go

0:01:15.222,0:01:15.929
we ain't slaves

0:01:15.929,0:01:17.535
all that sand turned your brains to mush

0:01:17.535,0:01:19.379
I think you need to stop smoking

0:01:19.379,0:01:20.598
all that burning bush

0:01:20.598,0:01:22.205
yeah we're magical workers man

0:01:22.205,0:01:23.272
we hang with reindeers

0:01:23.272,0:01:24.653
yo here's a GPS

0:01:24.653,0:01:26.029
who gets lost for 40 years?

0:01:26.029,0:01:27.617
you're a glorified secretary

0:01:27.617,0:01:28.629
so write this down

0:01:28.629,0:01:29.681
begat deez nutz

0:01:29.681,0:01:31.818
Santa Claus is coming to town

0:01:31.818,0:01:34.058
so much drama in the Israe-L B C

0:01:34.058,0:01:35.591
it's kinda hard talking directly

0:01:35.591,0:01:37.243
to the G O single D

0:01:37.243,0:01:38.147
hand me my chisel

0:01:38.147,0:01:39.895
I got a new commandizzle for y'all

0:01:39.895,0:01:41.269
thou shalt not let children

0:01:41.269,0:01:42.896
sit on a grown man's lap at the mall

0:01:42.896,0:01:44.111
I'll beat you ten times

0:01:44.111,0:01:45.746
before the bread can rise you dummy

0:01:45.746,0:01:46.834
and walk off into the land

0:01:46.834,0:01:48.449
of my milk and honies

0:01:48.449,0:01:49.858
who won?

0:01:49.858,0:01:51.147
who's next?

0:01:51.147,0:01:52.657
you decide