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Welcome to another exciting episode of Are

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You Unemployed?

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[energetic music]

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Here's your host, The Bureau of Labor

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Statistics.

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[audience cheering]

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Hello, jobless Americans! The unemployment

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figures have been released. So it's time

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to see if you're officially unemployed!

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Let's meet our contestants.

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Contestant number 1. You were recently

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laid off. Have you found a new job?

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[sigh] No way. No one's hiring right now.

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I haven't even bothered to look.

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[Buzzer sound]

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I'm sorry! You are not in the labor

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market and therefore are not officially

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unemployed.

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[energetic music]

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Contestant number 2. It says here you lost

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your job as an auto worker. Have you found

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a new one?

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No, not yet. The industry isn't doing so

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well. I need a job but I stopped looking

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because the plants closed down.

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[Buzzer sound]

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Oh, I'm sorry! You're not working but

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you're not officially unemployed either.

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[Bell dings]

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Contestant number 3. You were an airline

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pilot until a recent downsizing. Have you

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found work?

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Ugh. Well, I'm still looking for a real

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job, but all I could get was four hours a

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week at a home store.

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[Buzzer]

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Oh no! That four hours counts as employed!

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Contestant number 4. You lost your job as

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a stockbroker. Have you found another?

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No, I haven't yet but I did look in the

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classifieds last week.

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[music and sound of typing]

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[loud hearbeat sound]

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[loud celebratory music]

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Congratulations, Contestant number 4!

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You get to to the counted in the official

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unemployment rate!

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But what about the other contestants?

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They're jobless. Why don't they count?

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Well, if we included them,

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that would make the number much worse!