WEBVTT

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Heya

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Why do you look ridiculous?

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Oh thanks yeah I'm getting into golf

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Oh because the whole Rory McIlroy and The Masters?

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Yeah well I just figured you know

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I'm not getting any younger and golf is a game that

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looks kindly upon the older gentlemen

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or lady

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Depending on what year your rule book was

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written in right?

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Hold on golf is a lot more inclusive these days

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Really?

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You go into any clubhouse there's a captain

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and a lady captain

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who are equally insufferable

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That's great

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Yeah i've even got myself a golf coach

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How's your swing?

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We're not there yet still working on the basics

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Oh like your grip or?

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Wealth accumulation

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What?

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If you can master that you can

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really succeed at the game

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I went golfing once

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Yeah you spent more time in the sand

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than David Hasseloff

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hahahaha

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Owwww

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Is that supposed to be a joke?

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No

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It's low quality golf banter

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it's one of the most difficult parts of the game to master

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Over 18 holes that's really going to grate

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Oh yeah it wears you down

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You going to Claire's later?

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Nah I got to hit the gym

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coach has me deadlifting 200 kg

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You can't lift that

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No i know i can't but a huge part of golf

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is having a bad back

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just look in any clubhouse

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You're really serious about this whole golf thing?

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I've even invested in a fancy set of clubs

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Can I see them?

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No apparently they have to remain in

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the boot of my car at all times

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Hmmm]

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Could you smear this in a perfectly straight line across my forehead?

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What is it?

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Well it's a skin lightening cream

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What why?

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Yeah I'm trying to get that golfer's tan

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You know I just don't want to look like an idiot in the changing rooms

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Right

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where are the drinks?

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Couldn't get them

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Why not?

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I was at the bar i was about to pay

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somebody coughed it just

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it completely threw me

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Okay well I'll get them i guess

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Oh thanks man yeah

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so it's uh 30 yards to the bar

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there's a dog leg to the right

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just try to avoid the hazard

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What hazard?

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It's my wife and kids

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What?

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yeah a huge part of golf

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is avoiding your family

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Doomdah

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We've got five shows in Dublin in May in Vicar Street

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that's a lot of "ins"

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It is yeah

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Yes take a sleave

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have a sleave

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thank you finally I'm being respected

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we're also going to Australia and New Zealand

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in June

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Doomdah