0:00:11.791,0:00:12.799
Wow,

0:00:13.030,0:00:14.220
what an audience.

0:00:14.515,0:00:17.531
But if I'm being honest,[br]I don't care what you think of my talk.

0:00:18.097,0:00:19.101
I don't.

0:00:19.101,0:00:21.100
I care what the internet[br]thinks of my talk.

0:00:21.100,0:00:22.101
(Laughter)

0:00:22.101,0:00:24.579
Because they are the ones[br]who get it seen and shared.

0:00:24.579,0:00:26.907
And I think that's where[br]most people get it wrong.

0:00:26.907,0:00:28.574
They're talking to you, here,

0:00:28.660,0:00:33.290
instead of talking to you,[br]random person scrolling Facebook.

0:00:34.323,0:00:35.503
Thanks for the click.

0:00:36.141,0:00:37.825
You see, back in 2009,

0:00:37.855,0:00:41.400
we all had these weird little things[br]called attention spans.

0:00:41.400,0:00:42.400
(Laughter)

0:00:42.400,0:00:45.596
Yeah, they're gone. They're gone.[br]We killed them. They're dead.

0:00:46.287,0:00:50.060
I'm trying to think of the last time[br]I watched an 18-minute TED talk.

0:00:50.140,0:00:52.640
It's been years, literally years.

0:00:52.865,0:00:55.560
So if you're giving[br]a TED talk, keep it quick.

0:00:55.700,0:00:57.500
I'm doing mine in under a minute.

0:00:57.560,0:00:59.155
I'm at 44 seconds right now;

0:00:59.155,0:01:01.283
that means we've got[br]time for one final joke.

0:01:01.450,0:01:04.500
Why are balloons so expensive?

0:01:04.580,0:01:05.705
(Audience) "Why?"

0:01:05.705,0:01:06.941
Woody Roseland: Inflation.

0:01:06.941,0:01:08.000
(Laughter)

0:01:08.000,0:01:10.666
(Applause)