0:00:03.805,0:00:05.134
People hate me.

0:00:05.924,0:00:07.164
People fear me.

0:00:08.414,0:00:11.634
You see, I'm a communication professor.

0:00:12.194,0:00:15.086
And these people who fear me and hate me

0:00:15.176,0:00:21.096
are some of the brightest, most creative,[br]most entrepreneurial people I know.

0:00:22.346,0:00:23.687
I wield a tool.

0:00:24.347,0:00:29.615
And that tool I wield[br]is what makes them fear and despise me.

0:00:30.565,0:00:35.076
As a professor, I have the ability[br]to do what's called "cold calling."

0:00:35.116,0:00:38.386
That's where I look at a student[br]and say, "What do you think?

0:00:38.706,0:00:41.076
What do you feel[br]about what we just discussed?

0:00:41.606,0:00:43.517
How does this impact you?"

0:00:44.167,0:00:46.855
And this causes panic,

0:00:48.075,0:00:51.626
not just for my students[br]but for everybody:

0:00:52.166,0:00:56.076
that moment where we are called upon[br]to speak articulately.

0:00:57.006,0:00:58.248
Can we do it?

0:00:59.148,0:01:02.887
Now, rest assured,[br]I never cold call on my students.

0:01:03.087,0:01:05.847
I think it's rude, and I know it's hard.

0:01:06.897,0:01:08.311
But people fear it.

0:01:09.211,0:01:14.898
Eighty-five percent of people[br]say they fear speaking in public.

0:01:14.948,0:01:17.947
And quite frankly,[br]I think the other 15% are lying.

0:01:18.207,0:01:22.238
I think we could find a situation[br]that makes them nervous too.

0:01:22.928,0:01:28.448
So today, my goal is to share with you[br]some tips and techniques that you can use

0:01:28.688,0:01:32.538
to help you be more comfortable[br]and confident when you're speaking,

0:01:32.727,0:01:37.107
in other words, to be able[br]to think fast and talk smart.

0:01:38.047,0:01:41.288
To do this, we're going to look[br]at four different steps.

0:01:41.458,0:01:44.079
First, we're going to talk[br]about the approach we take.

0:01:44.669,0:01:47.329
Then, we'll speak[br]about the audience we talk to,

0:01:47.679,0:01:50.029
the context in which we find ourselves

0:01:50.049,0:01:55.758
and finally, the structures we use[br]to help our messages get across.

0:01:56.948,0:01:59.319
So, let's start by talking about approach.

0:02:00.569,0:02:03.750
You know, I was reminded[br]about the importance of approach

0:02:04.100,0:02:08.047
many, many years ago, when my wife[br]and I first moved in with each other.

0:02:08.077,0:02:11.869
You see, we fought a lot[br]over little things,

0:02:13.009,0:02:15.699
things mostly that happened[br]in our bathrooms.

0:02:15.729,0:02:17.450
We called these our bathroom brawls:

0:02:17.450,0:02:18.609
"Is the toilet seat up?"

0:02:18.649,0:02:20.270
"Is the toilet seat down?"

0:02:20.290,0:02:23.124
By far, the biggest fight[br]my wife and I ever had

0:02:23.964,0:02:25.364
was over toothpaste.

0:02:25.394,0:02:26.934
(Laughter)

0:02:27.204,0:02:30.678
You see, my wife's a roller,[br]and I'm a squeezer.

0:02:31.648,0:02:33.600
And all of you out there who are rollers,

0:02:33.600,0:02:37.360
I appreciate the fine artwork[br]you create out of your toothpaste.

0:02:37.390,0:02:42.121
But you know that the most awful thing[br]that can happen to you

0:02:42.151,0:02:46.408
is to have a squeezer come by[br]and ruin all that effort you've put in.

0:02:46.408,0:02:49.698
But to me, getting toothpaste[br]out of a tube is an act of aggression.

0:02:49.711,0:02:52.081
I feel powerful in the morning[br]and in the evening.

0:02:52.091,0:02:53.110
(Laughter)

0:02:53.360,0:02:56.191
And we would fight incessantly[br]over little things like this.

0:02:56.191,0:02:59.122
And finally, my wife,[br]who is much smarter than I,

0:02:59.482,0:03:02.903
said, "Timeout. What are we doing here?[br]We've just been married.

0:03:02.903,0:03:05.340
We love each other,[br]yet we're fighting all the time.

0:03:05.340,0:03:07.360
We need to look at this differently."

0:03:07.480,0:03:12.020
And as soon as we started looking[br]at our bathroom brawls

0:03:12.660,0:03:14.850
as opportunities -

0:03:14.980,0:03:20.243
opportunities to learn about each other,[br]to make concessions, to collaborate -

0:03:20.282,0:03:21.591
things changed.

0:03:21.951,0:03:24.702
And I'm happy to say,[br]after 15 years of marriage,

0:03:24.812,0:03:27.120
we no longer fight over toothpaste.

0:03:27.160,0:03:28.300
(Laughter)

0:03:28.720,0:03:32.020
This same approach[br]is true in communication.

0:03:32.050,0:03:35.951
Most of us, when we are in situations[br]where we need to communicate,

0:03:37.101,0:03:39.002
we see them as threatening.

0:03:39.392,0:03:42.283
We see them as opportunities for failure.

0:03:42.743,0:03:45.302
And I'd like to suggest[br]that we need to change that.

0:03:45.602,0:03:48.682
We need to approach[br]communication in an open way,

0:03:48.732,0:03:53.213
see it as an opportunity to share[br]our ideas, our beliefs, our innovations.

0:03:53.503,0:03:56.473
And when we take[br]a perspective of openness,

0:03:56.863,0:03:59.342
all of a sudden, something that we dread

0:03:59.732,0:04:02.092
becomes something that we embrace.

0:04:02.112,0:04:04.613
So, the first step[br]to effective communication

0:04:04.643,0:04:07.363
is to approach it in an open way.

0:04:08.983,0:04:10.283
But that's not enough.

0:04:10.833,0:04:14.512
We need to think about the audience[br]that we're speaking to.

0:04:16.012,0:04:20.961
And to me, the way to approach it[br]is the opposite the way most people do.

0:04:20.981,0:04:24.110
Most of us think about,[br]"Here's what I want to say"

0:04:24.110,0:04:26.343
or, "Here's what I need to say."

0:04:26.633,0:04:29.073
I would suggest that's exactly wrong.

0:04:29.103,0:04:32.933
You need to think about,[br]"What does my audience need to hear?"

0:04:34.863,0:04:38.243
And it sounds just like verbal jiu jitsu,[br]where I'm moving words around,

0:04:38.243,0:04:40.654
but in fact, it's[br]a fundamental difference.

0:04:40.674,0:04:43.255
If I ask myself,[br]"What does my audience need,"

0:04:43.255,0:04:46.165
it puts me in service of my audience.

0:04:46.185,0:04:48.014
It's about their needs.

0:04:48.304,0:04:52.153
And in order to understand those needs,[br]I have to do some reconnaissance.

0:04:52.173,0:04:54.653
I have to ask myself who they are.

0:04:56.023,0:05:00.194
The three things I think we need[br]to ask about our audience are,

0:05:00.204,0:05:01.934
"What is their knowledge?"

0:05:01.994,0:05:03.863
"What is it that they know?"

0:05:04.483,0:05:06.073
and if they don't know enough,

0:05:06.073,0:05:08.894
"What can we do[br]to scaffold that information

0:05:08.924,0:05:11.235
so that they have the tools they need?"

0:05:11.515,0:05:12.835
In addition to knowledge,

0:05:12.835,0:05:15.774
we need to be thinking[br]about their expectations.

0:05:16.454,0:05:21.633
And by expectations, I mean,[br]What is it that they expect of me?

0:05:22.463,0:05:26.595
Most audiences have heard the types[br]of presentations you're giving:

0:05:26.625,0:05:28.186
maybe it's a pitch,

0:05:28.536,0:05:31.656
maybe it's some kind[br]of advertisement or marketing,

0:05:31.696,0:05:33.464
maybe it's a TED talk.

0:05:33.754,0:05:37.085
Your audience has heard[br]those kinds of presentations before,

0:05:37.085,0:05:39.075
so what do they expect of you?

0:05:39.475,0:05:42.795
And then you can choose to conform[br]to those expectations or not.

0:05:43.435,0:05:45.556
You know, I have two young kids,

0:05:45.556,0:05:48.506
and I learned that sometimes[br]violating their expectations

0:05:48.546,0:05:52.845
actually is the most effective thing[br]I can do for the communication we need.

0:05:53.875,0:05:56.217
My boys sometimes make me upset.

0:05:56.547,0:06:01.065
And when they make me upset,[br]I used to raise my voice to no avail.

0:06:01.105,0:06:02.185
Nothing happened.

0:06:02.215,0:06:03.677
I was ignored.

0:06:03.707,0:06:05.936
And that's tough for a communication guy.

0:06:05.936,0:06:07.587
So, what I started to do -

0:06:07.607,0:06:09.896
when I'm really upset with my boys,

0:06:09.906,0:06:12.116
I lower my voice.

0:06:12.886,0:06:15.446
And they stop dead in their tracks.

0:06:16.106,0:06:20.255
Violating expectations sometimes[br]can actually help you as a communicator.

0:06:20.845,0:06:25.287
The final thing we need to think about is,[br]"What are their attitudes?"

0:06:25.467,0:06:27.446
The way you approach your communication

0:06:27.446,0:06:31.626
is influenced by what your audience[br]thinks about what you're talking on:

0:06:31.657,0:06:33.907
Are they in favor of it?[br]Are they against it?

0:06:33.917,0:06:35.647
Or they're hesitant? Agnostic?

0:06:35.667,0:06:40.048
Those are the things you need to be asking[br]yourself when you communicate.

0:06:40.308,0:06:43.617
So, we need to appreciate our audience.

0:06:44.617,0:06:48.837
When my older child[br]was in kindergarten, I volunteered.

0:06:48.857,0:06:50.737
I came into his classroom,

0:06:50.767,0:06:53.296
the teacher had to leave[br]to take a call or something,

0:06:53.296,0:06:55.957
and I was in charge of an art project.

0:06:56.557,0:06:58.648
Oh, was that a mistake.

0:06:59.128,0:07:00.514
The kids were running around.

0:07:00.514,0:07:03.340
I was saying, "Stop this, Johnny."[br]"Sally, stop doing that."

0:07:03.340,0:07:04.380
Nobody listened.

0:07:05.457,0:07:07.787
The Yoda-like teacher returned,

0:07:07.817,0:07:11.428
saw the chaos that had ensued[br]in her brief absence

0:07:11.688,0:07:13.303
and simply looked at the children

0:07:13.303,0:07:16.253
and started rewarding[br]the positive behavior.

0:07:17.208,0:07:21.839
"Janet," she said, "what a lovely way[br]you've cleaned up your crayons."

0:07:22.699,0:07:27.328
"Samuel, thank you so much[br]for walking with the scissors."

0:07:27.478,0:07:28.638
(Laughter)

0:07:29.108,0:07:33.048
The students stopped in their tracks,[br]changed their behavior.

0:07:33.078,0:07:37.699
I learned then that you need to understand[br]your audience and what they need.

0:07:37.719,0:07:41.059
And to this day,[br]I try to apply those principles.

0:07:41.639,0:07:44.860
I also learned that I could never teach[br]elementary school students.

0:07:44.870,0:07:47.807
If guilt and shame doesn't work,[br]I can't teach them.

0:07:47.817,0:07:48.927
(Laughter)

0:07:49.037,0:07:52.218
So, knowing your audience really matters.

0:07:52.448,0:07:54.049
But beyond knowing your audience,

0:07:54.049,0:07:57.590
you have to appreciate the context[br]in which you speak.

0:07:57.900,0:08:01.324
Whenever you speak,[br]you are in a particular context.

0:08:01.354,0:08:04.370
And to me, context comes[br]in a bunch of different varieties.

0:08:04.390,0:08:07.959
The first thing about context[br]we need to think about is the time.

0:08:07.979,0:08:10.730
What time of day are you communicating?

0:08:11.350,0:08:13.727
If you're talking early in the morning,

0:08:13.737,0:08:15.741
you might have to have[br]a little more energy

0:08:15.741,0:08:16.811
to keep people moving.

0:08:16.811,0:08:20.891
Same thing after lunch when people[br]are having that food coma experience.

0:08:22.060,0:08:24.449
I taught high school many, many years ago.

0:08:24.459,0:08:27.270
And I don't think my principal[br]liked me very much

0:08:27.300,0:08:32.432
because she gave me freshmen[br]right before lunch and right after lunch.

0:08:32.461,0:08:35.791
And if you know anything[br]about 14- and 15-year-old kids,

0:08:35.811,0:08:39.331
they need lots of food[br]and lots of social experience.

0:08:39.391,0:08:44.391
So, by the time my first class of freshmen[br]came to me after four hours of class,

0:08:44.411,0:08:46.161
they were dead tired.

0:08:46.191,0:08:48.539
They could barely move, let alone think.

0:08:49.219,0:08:51.911
Right after lunch,[br]when my second batch joined me,

0:08:51.931,0:08:56.202
they were amped-up on their food,[br]their caffeine, their friends.

0:08:56.232,0:08:58.421
It was a frenzy in my classroom.

0:08:58.441,0:09:00.981
And I had to teach them the same thing.

0:09:01.871,0:09:03.221
How did I do it?

0:09:03.221,0:09:06.441
I changed the way we approached the class.

0:09:07.321,0:09:09.560
The class before lunch[br]was highly collaborative,

0:09:09.560,0:09:11.701
people were moving around,[br]lots of activities;

0:09:11.701,0:09:13.913
after lunch, a little more mellow.

0:09:13.913,0:09:19.381
You must address the context, the timing[br]so your message can be effective.

0:09:21.231,0:09:23.882
Context also involves emotion.

0:09:24.122,0:09:27.862
Most of us when we communicate,[br]we think about information:

0:09:27.902,0:09:31.252
What's in my head, in my heart[br]I need to communicate to you?

0:09:31.292,0:09:33.753
But we also communicate a feeling.

0:09:33.883,0:09:36.993
Maybe we're trying to get people[br]excited and motivate them.

0:09:37.303,0:09:38.883
Maybe we're trying to scare them,

0:09:38.883,0:09:42.802
create that burning platform[br]that motivates them to change.

0:09:42.802,0:09:45.193
Sometimes, we're just trying[br]to instill confidence:

0:09:45.193,0:09:47.032
You should believe in what I'm saying.

0:09:47.032,0:09:51.604
But we need to think about the emotion[br]as well as the information.

0:09:53.374,0:09:58.312
The final bit of context has to do with[br]where you're physically speaking.

0:09:59.122,0:10:00.883
Location matters.

0:10:02.003,0:10:04.534
Just the other day,[br]I read in the newspaper

0:10:04.534,0:10:07.973
that the Girl Scout in the state[br]of California this year

0:10:07.983,0:10:12.793
who sold the most cookies during[br]the Girl Scout's annual cookie drive

0:10:13.113,0:10:17.324
set up shop in front[br]of a medical marijuana dispensary.

0:10:18.624,0:10:21.654
She sold more cookies than anybody.

0:10:21.674,0:10:23.824
Location matters.

0:10:23.854,0:10:25.714
Think about the way the room is set up.[br]

0:10:25.744,0:10:28.744
Think about the environment:[br]Is it live? Is it virtual?

0:10:28.754,0:10:31.845
Those change the way that you communicate.

0:10:31.865,0:10:34.785
We need to think about location.

0:10:36.225,0:10:38.394
So, our approach is important.[br]

0:10:38.474,0:10:40.264
Our audience is important.

0:10:40.554,0:10:44.162
The context in which[br]we find ourselves is important

0:10:44.902,0:10:47.854
and so too is the way[br]we structure our messages.

0:10:50.444,0:10:55.814
It is much easier for humans to understand[br]information when it is structured.

0:10:56.214,0:11:00.974
In fact, we remember information[br]up to 40% better when it's structured.

0:11:01.444,0:11:03.184
What do I mean by this?

0:11:03.204,0:11:06.285
Some of you listening[br]are too young to remember,

0:11:06.315,0:11:08.125
but those of us of my age,

0:11:08.125,0:11:10.545
when we wanted to call[br]somebody on the phone,

0:11:10.935,0:11:13.406
we actually had to remember[br]a phone number.

0:11:13.726,0:11:16.205
My kids today, they look[br]at a picture, push a button,

0:11:16.205,0:11:18.505
and the other person[br]starts talking on the phone.

0:11:18.505,0:11:20.575
We had it much harder.[br]

0:11:20.635,0:11:22.075
We had to remember 10 digits.

0:11:22.075,0:11:24.796
Ten digits are hard to remember,[br]so what did we do?

0:11:24.796,0:11:28.005
We put them in a structure:[br]three-three-and four.

0:11:28.995,0:11:30.445
That's how we remembered.

0:11:30.445,0:11:32.107
That's what I mean by a structure.

0:11:32.107,0:11:35.156
The information is put in a way[br]that it makes it easy

0:11:35.156,0:11:38.956
not only for you as a speaker[br]but also for the audience to remember.

0:11:40.526,0:11:44.195
Now, I have lots of favorite structures.

0:11:44.195,0:11:46.545
You see some of the structures[br]up here behind me.

0:11:46.545,0:11:51.656
The first structure is a chronological[br]structure: past-present-future.

0:11:51.686,0:11:53.077
Here's how things used to be.

0:11:53.077,0:11:54.316
Here's how they are today.

0:11:54.316,0:11:56.417
Here's where they're going in the future.

0:11:56.437,0:11:59.496
A chronological structure[br]can really help you

0:11:59.496,0:12:03.366
navigate your audience[br]from one place to the next.

0:12:03.576,0:12:06.677
Quite frankly,[br]structure sets expectations.

0:12:06.997,0:12:10.877
You can't be lost if you have a map.[br]

0:12:10.897,0:12:12.647
Your structure provides a map,

0:12:12.667,0:12:16.097
and the chronological structure[br]is incredibly helpful for that.

0:12:17.247,0:12:22.486
The next structure happens to be[br]the problem-solution-benefit structure.

0:12:22.486,0:12:25.767
This is one of the most[br]persuasive structures out there.

0:12:25.777,0:12:27.978
You start by explaining what the issue is,

0:12:27.998,0:12:31.548
you talk about how to solve it[br]and then the benefits to the people.

0:12:33.337,0:12:38.018
Finally, my favorite structure,[br]the one that I use the most -

0:12:38.028,0:12:40.930
I call this "the MacGyver[br]of all structures";

0:12:41.250,0:12:43.827
this can get you through any situation -

0:12:44.217,0:12:47.859
is the what, so-what, now-what structure.

0:12:48.129,0:12:50.759
You start by telling people[br]what the issue is.

0:12:50.799,0:12:53.827
You tell them why it's important[br]in that so-what step.

0:12:53.847,0:12:56.418
And then you tell them[br]what's next, what's coming.

0:12:56.468,0:12:57.928
It's like a Swiss Army knife.

0:12:57.958,0:13:00.505
You can use it in situations[br]if you're teaching.

0:13:00.525,0:13:03.728
You can use it if you are trying[br]to motivate people.

0:13:04.078,0:13:07.039
And you can use it[br]even if you're introducing somebody.

0:13:07.079,0:13:10.779
Change the "what" to a "who,"[br]and you've got your introduction.

0:13:13.229,0:13:17.249
Structure helps keep your audience[br]together and in line.

0:13:17.719,0:13:20.910
When I was an undergraduate,[br]I was a tour guide.

0:13:20.940,0:13:23.079
It was the highest-paying job on campus.

0:13:23.079,0:13:24.910
And boy, did I need money.

0:13:24.950,0:13:28.479
I trained for 12 weeks to be a tour guide.

0:13:28.799,0:13:33.860
I learned lots of interesting - some would[br]say useless - facts about my university,

0:13:34.380,0:13:37.489
things they drilled into our heads[br]besides how to walk backwards,

0:13:37.489,0:13:40.040
which to this day I still can do[br]in a straight line.

0:13:40.230,0:13:42.510
The most important thing they taught us -

0:13:42.510,0:13:44.009
they said, "Above all else,

0:13:44.009,0:13:47.000
to be a great tour guide[br]at this institution

0:13:47.060,0:13:50.720
is to never lose your audience.

0:13:50.750,0:13:54.601
You are a bad tour guide[br]if your tour group gets lost."

0:13:55.031,0:13:57.861
The same is true when you're speaking.

0:13:57.891,0:14:00.591
Structure keeps people together.

0:14:00.891,0:14:02.220
We need structure.

0:14:04.850,0:14:08.770
So, we see here that these tools,

0:14:09.360,0:14:13.810
the tools that help us get our audience[br]engaged and involved

0:14:13.850,0:14:15.711
and help us convey our message

0:14:16.221,0:14:22.440
are the same tools that helped my students[br]learn to love speaking

0:14:22.450,0:14:24.161
and learn to do it well.

0:14:24.991,0:14:26.951
It's about the approach you take,

0:14:27.191,0:14:28.469
the audience,

0:14:28.899,0:14:30.139
the context,

0:14:30.289,0:14:31.682
and the structure.

0:14:32.162,0:14:35.903
Now, I'm always looking for examples[br]of this to help people understand.

0:14:35.913,0:14:38.331
And the other day, I was eating breakfast,

0:14:38.331,0:14:41.131
and I looked across the table[br]at my soy milk,

0:14:41.151,0:14:44.772
and I said, "You know what?[br]This is a great example."

0:14:45.482,0:14:48.511
Think about it: Silk soy milk.

0:14:50.631,0:14:55.442
Silk soy milk is targeted[br]to a very specific audience:

0:14:56.032,0:14:58.335
people who are interested[br]in eating healthy

0:14:59.315,0:15:01.915
or people who are lactose intolerant.

0:15:03.045,0:15:07.602
The name is a combination[br]of the words "soy" and "milk" -

0:15:08.122,0:15:09.382
"Silk."

0:15:09.732,0:15:11.362
It speaks to the audience's desire

0:15:11.362,0:15:15.713
to have something rich,[br]something expensive, something yummy.

0:15:17.713,0:15:22.014
It's at a time, in a context,[br]in an environment.

0:15:22.014,0:15:25.813
If you notice where you buy Silk soy milk,[br]it's next to other milk.

0:15:25.813,0:15:27.852
That's not where it was originally.

0:15:27.872,0:15:29.892
It used to be in the health food aisle.

0:15:29.912,0:15:31.194
Now it's next to milk.

0:15:31.194,0:15:34.175
They marketed it and boxed it[br]the way milk is.

0:15:35.085,0:15:38.452
The structure of the name[br]is very compelling.

0:15:38.472,0:15:42.253
Let's face it, they[br]could have called it "Moy,"

0:15:43.843,0:15:46.083
and nobody would've bought it, right?

0:15:46.694,0:15:51.554
So, if you get the message right[br]and you communicate it effectively,

0:15:51.904,0:15:53.884
you can make a big difference.

0:15:55.564,0:15:59.824
So, I want for you what I wish[br]for all of my students:

0:16:00.354,0:16:04.354
bold communication[br]that's confident and compelling.

0:16:04.864,0:16:09.224
And I want for your message to echo[br]long after you leave the room.

0:16:09.514,0:16:12.344
And these are skills[br]that are at your disposal.

0:16:12.384,0:16:16.796
It just takes practice[br]and a little bit of a positive approach.

0:16:16.846,0:16:17.865
Thank you.