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How To Get A Date In 30 Seconds | Chewing Gum

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    A'ight, look, I hear words, yeah?
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    I hear commands. I see strings.
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    Mum says hand out some flyers,
    a thousand. Cool, that's a string.
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    Mum says speak in tongues.
    That's a string.
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    Mum says heal the sick. String!
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    Do you know what I do
    with them strings? Pull them.
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    Like a farmer
    milking the five penises of a cow.
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    I pull them things
    and things just happen.
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    It's gonna be fine, guys,
    gonna move back home.
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    Gonna take my bin bag,
    gonna unbag it.
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    Oh, flyer!
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    Hey, hey! Nice piercings.
    Got that for fashion, yeah?
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    Jesus got his piercings
    dying for you. Don't you feel bad?
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    -Fuck off.
    -Cool.
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    How many have I shifted?
    -You gave me one three hours ago.
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    So, one.
    -Cool.
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    Cool. Cool.
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    Oh, Connor!
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    Yass!
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    Tracey.
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    -You all right?
    -You all right?
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    Oh, right. Yeah?
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    -I've never done that before.
    -That's...
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    Emma. Better go.
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    See you later.
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    Hey, Mr Keys.
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    -Fucking ... Honda Civic.
    -Yes, yes, Honda Civic!
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    Mercedes-Benz, Nissan Micra.
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    You're homeless
    and so happy about it.
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    I beg you, Keys. Keys, Keys!
    I beg you, take the flyer.
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    Jesus loves you.
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    Damn! Only Jesus?
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    -Maybe your friends and family too.
    -It was just a joke, I was...
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    I was joking by way of flirting.
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    Hetero.
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    Anyway, back to the flyer, yes.
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    Soul needs saving.
    -Wanna take some for your friends?
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    As long as that's not all
    I'm taking from you.
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    -Hm?
    -He wants your number.
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    -I'm Ash, by the way.
    -You're very handsome.
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    -Thank you.
    -Don't say thank you. It's not good,
    it's not bad, I'm just sayin'.
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    Got a job? For more than one week?
    -Yeah. Three years.
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    -Do you live with your mum?
    -No, I have my own penthouse
    apartment.
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    -Are you dumb or are you smart?
    -Well, that's a subjective question.
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    -Did you finish your...
    -I've got a degree in finance.
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    Cool, drop call my phone.
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    Drop call my phone.
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    07700
    -Yeah.
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    900 305
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    I'm doing it.
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    That was easy.
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    Connor replaced me,
    I'll replace him.
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    String!
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    End the call. Why you still calling?
    It's a drop call. End the call, man.
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    Thanks, love.
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    Flyers. For your friends,
    your friends and your family.
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    Handed out all my flyers.
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    Replaced my boyfriend.
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    Handed out all my flyers.
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    Replaced my boyfriend.
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    Tracey, yeah?
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    Yes.
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    What? She doesn't know
    that she's got cancer?
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    What? I don't have cancer.
Title:
How To Get A Date In 30 Seconds | Chewing Gum
Description:
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Video Language:
English
Duration:
03:23

English subtitles

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