How to Solve The Housing Crisis

Next up on the agenda we have

the housing crisis.

Aw no

Lads I don't, I don't want to hear it.

No, stop that.

Stop that at once.

We've been putting this off for long enough.

All right?

We need a solution to this issue.

We need to think outside the box.

Ireland has the highest number of pubs and bars

per capita in the world.

Alright

And in the 80s

my Dad

practically lived in the pub.

Well, there you go. We extend the opening hours.

We're off to a runner.

Okay.

We could relax building regulations a bit?

Oh, yeah?

Yes, you could do that

Because you can get a great discount on asbestos.

No, no. Stop right now.

How do you spell asbestos?

People have a big problem

with vulture funds.

Get rid of them?

No, change the name

to eagle funds.

Ah, very nice.

That's cooler.

Airbnb.

Oh, get rid of them.

I'm sorry, but we can't. No. You see,

I have a German couple coming to stay in one of my places this weekend.

They're very excited about it

Oh, fair enough. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And they're paying through the teeth for it

Oh, the poor things.

Why don't we encourage some people

to immigrate by raising the cost of living slowly?

Oh, that's great. Yeah.

No, I think we might already be doing that.

Are we?

We are yeah.

Maybe it's not that there's too many people,

but that they're living too long.

Ah, all right. So, what are you suggesting?

Defund The Health Service

Again. I think we might um...

already be doing that.

Okay. yeah

How far along are we with cryogenics?

Why?

We don't have a lot of houses at the moment,

but if some people could hold off for a while.

Ah...

We've had car pool

Right?

What about

House Pool?

House pool?

Oh, yeah. I have a pool in my house.

You do?

It's lovely.

The chlorine levels a bit high, but it's nice.

Yeah.

If that doesn't work, we could convert everyone to Buddhist monks.

All right.

I could do with a change.

They're a lot happier with much less.

Oh, yeah.

They don't need a big house.

They don't need electricity,

running water, you know.

That's right.

And then I mean the population will know kung fu

which is obviously of benefit

I don't think there is a direct correlation there now

It wouldn't

Yeah, you need to still learn it, Paddy. I think.

Yeah.

Jasus I think I have it, lads.

Well spit it out.

We build

more

houses.

Now come on let's keep it serious

for a moment will we?

Sorry. Yeah. Sorry about that

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and we've got extra shows

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