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Mind Your Language Season 2 Episode 1 All Present If Not Correct

  • 0:34 - 0:37
    Principal's office
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    Good evening Sidney
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    Good evening Miss Courtney, just
    giving your door a bit of a touch up
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    Had a nice holiday?
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    l spent seven days in sunny Spain
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    - Pardon? - Sunny Spain
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    - That sounds nice - lt rained
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    Oh, l am sorry! Still l expect you enjoyed
    all those exotic Spanish dishes
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    - l got food poisoning - Oh sorry
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    Did it rain every day?
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    Oh no! When l got
    food poisoning the sun came out
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    When l got better, it went back in
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    Apart from the day before we
    left. That was absolutely glorious
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    - Well at least you had one
    good day - l got sunburnt
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    What a pity!
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    - Hello Sid - Mr. Brown, welcome back
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    - Ta, is she in?
    - l've creamed out your bin
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    - No, is she in? - Yeah,
    but she's in a shocking temper
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    - l'll see her later then
    - Glad to be back?
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    Yeah, l shall miss my old class
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    But l shall enjoy the challenge of
    starting again with fresh minds
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    l wonder how many different nationalities
    l'll have to deal with this term?
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    Good evening
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    Pleased to meet you
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    Thank you
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    Do you speak English?
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    - Hungry? - lgen
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    You want something to eat?
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    - Hungry - Hungary
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    l'll put you in my register
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    What is your name?
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    Your name
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    - Zoltan Szabo - Zoltan Szabo
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    This is yes
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    This is no
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    Yes... No
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    Good
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    l am Mr. Brown, your teacher
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    l hope that was complimentary
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    Never mind
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    Do you know any English?
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    Yes
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    - Gud sev de kwin - God Save the Queen
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    More? Some more English?
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    - Pliz, thank you - Good
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    - Shtones - Shtones?
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    - Rolling Stones? - Yes
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    Good evening Mr. Brown
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    l am most happy to
    be seeing you again
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    Anna, Ranjeet! What
    are you doing here?
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    We failed our exam but we are
    coming back for more lessons
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    That is correct! Like Roberty Bruce say
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    lf at first you are not succeeding, try, try
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    Again!
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    lf at first you are not succeeding...
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    Never mind
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    Were you not expecting us?
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    No the authorities don't notify the
    individual teachers of the results
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    And as usual Miss Courtney has
    kept me in the dark
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    She took the lights out?
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    No, she never told me!
    This is Zoltan, Ranjeet
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    Delighted to be making
    your acquaintance
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    What a nice man! He
    is giving me a present
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    He wants you to read out
    something from his phrase book
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    A thousand apologies
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    Waiter my soup is cold
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    Pleased to meet you
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    Thank you
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    Good and this is Anna
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    How do you do?
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    Yes, Thank you
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    Would you both like to sit down
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    This time l sit at front, then
    l can be learning quicker
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    l will be sitting in my
    accustomed place
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    Well, l was hoping that l had
    a hundred percent pass record
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    But still, two failures
    out of ten isn't bad
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    Good evening master
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    Four failures out of ten
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    Jamila you failed
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    Sorry Master
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    But maybe next time
    l shall be winning
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    l'm sure you mean winning
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    - And you, Taro - Ah so
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    Loss of face
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    Not goodo for Japanese
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    First, considered Hara-kiri
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    Then decide to como
    backo for more lessons
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    But if no pass next time
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    Just make sure you don't do
    it on the classroom floor
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    Well, as you can see you re not alone
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    This is Zoltan
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    Jamila, and Taro
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    - Pleased to meet you
    - Good evening
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    Jamila, you want your place back?
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    No, l sit at backside with Taro
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    No Jamila! You will sit at the back
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    Backside is what you sit on
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    No master, what l sit on is chair
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    Yes, l can see why you failed
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    Buenas noches everybodies
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    Juan! Don't tell me you failed
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    lt's all right! l not tell you
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    - You don't need to tell me!
    l know - You plenty smart
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    That's more than l can say for you
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    - Por favore? - Never mind
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    This is Zoltan! This is Juan
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    How you do?
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    ls for me?
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    He's really saying he's
    pleased to meet you
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    He doesn't speak English
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    lt's all right! l teach him
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    That would be like the
    blind leading the blind
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    Blind
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    He not see!
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    - You feel - Juan he's not blind
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    l was just using a...,
    never mind! Sit down
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    Ok! l sit here
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    - Good afton - Good evening
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    - l here come to English learn
    - l come here to learn English
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    We together sit
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    No, we can't do that
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    What is matter? There is
    wrong something with me?
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    There is wrong nothing with you
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    - l very much like you - l am your teacher
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    Teacher? You are too
    young to be teacher
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    Thank you
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    - ls that your name? - Yes
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    - lngrid Svenson - lngrid Svenson
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    - l take it you are Svedish...
    Swedish? - Ja
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    - Where from? - Stockholm
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    - Stockholm! And what is yourjob?
    - Au pair
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    Very nice
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    Where shall we sit you?
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    There's a place here with me
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    There is also a place here beside me
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    Here please
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    l think we'll sit you at
    the front for the time being
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    You're sitting next to
    Juan, behind you is Ranjeet
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    At the back are Taro and Jamila
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    She is Anna and he is Zoltan
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    And l am Ali
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    - Ali, not you as well
    - As well as what please?
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    - You failed? - Yes
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    l am getting twenty out of one hundred
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    That's nothing to be proud about
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    You're supposed to get at least fifty
    to pass! Twenty is disgraceful
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    Last year l am getting nothing at all
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    So l am doing better! l sit
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    - Scuse please! Get up - What for?
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    - That is my seat
    - l not see your name on seat
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    Get your big Spanish
    bottom out of my chair
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    You no talk me like that! l punch you
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    That's enough! Seats
    are not reservable
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    Sit somewhere else, Ali
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    Ok, l sit at the back
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    You big spanish bottom
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    We'll wait a few more moments in
    case there are any more new students
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    Buena Serra
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    lt's just like old times
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    lt's a big surprise, eh professori?
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    l am not disappointed to be back
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    - Who is that?
    - This is lngrid! She is Swedish
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    She is also sitting in my seat
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    - You will move yes? - l will move no
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    - You can sit next to me
    - No, you sit next to me
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    That's right! You sit beside Max and
    Giovanni because l want to sit here
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    l'm sorry Danielle! But l think it's
    important the new students sit at the front
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    - l don't like you - l'm so worried
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    You can come and sit next to me
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    - Sit between us - Ok
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    Well l must say that l'm
    extremely disappointed in you all
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    lt's not your fault professori!
    We not pass because we're stupid
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    - And what does that make me?
    - More stupid
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    Exactly! Out of ten students
    l've nine failures
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    Vely solly l'm rate
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    Congratulations! You are
    getting ten out of ten
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    Well l really don't know what to say
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    Oh blimey, if you are
    not knowing what to say
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    How are you going to be teaching us?
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    - l'll ignore that stupid remark
    - Jolly good
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    Because you have all failed, l have failed
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    lt's perfectly true
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    This term, l want much
    more effort from all of you
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    You must all pull your socks up
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    lt's all right
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    No Juan, l was speaking figuratively
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    - Por favore - Never mind
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    You must all concentrate
    much harder this term
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    We shall start at the beginning again
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    And this time l shall be giving
    twice as much homework as last time
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    l want a hundred per cent
    effort from all of you
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    Now tonight l want you each to tell
    me what you did during the holidays
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    - Please? - Yes Zoltan
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    l do not understand what you are saying
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    Never mind! Just keep quiet and listen
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    Never mind
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    l speak
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    No speak
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    - Thank you Juan - lt's all right
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    Now, what have you been
    doing with yourself, Jamila?
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    l went on holidays to visit all my family
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    - You went to Bombay? - No Birmingham
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    Birmingham, the Mecca of the Midlands
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    - And you Taro? - Ah so
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    What did you get up to?
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    Went on fishing holiday
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    - Good, did you catch
    anything? - Catcho heavy coldo
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    Did you enjoy your break Ali?
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    l am not breaking anything
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    - The holiday - Jolly good
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    l am learning how to be
    driving a motor car
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    Good, that's very useful! When
    do you take your test?
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    Oh blimey
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    l'm already failing my test
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    The examiner man was
    jumping out of the car
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    When l was going down a hill
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    - l expect you were going too
    fast - No, l was going backwards
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    - What did you do Su Lee?
    - Spent time lighting
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    - Lighting what? - Lighting book
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    Ah book
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    What sort of book are you lighting, writing?
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    ls called The Democratic way of Life
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    All about glorious freedom-loving Chinese
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    l see, a work of fiction
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    Tell us what you did with yourself Ranjeet
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    l have been looking after my cousin
    while her husband has been away
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    Very commendable
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    He is being discharged this week
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    Discharged? He's been in hospital?
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    No prison
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    And he is being sent to
    prison for something he didn't do
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    - What really didn't he do?
    - He didn't run fast enough
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    Quiet! Tell us what you did Giovanni
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    l went to Marsgate
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    - Margate - Scusi
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    l met this fantastic girl
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    She had the biggest...
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    l'm sure we all get your meaning
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    Every day we used to go on the sand for a bit
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    - For a while - Scusi?
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    To go on the sands for a while
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    To go on the sands for a bit can imply you
    were, well doing something naughty
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    That's right, we were very
    naughty on the sand
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    Silence!
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    Mr. Brown, miss Courtney
    wants you right away
  • 14:53 - 14:54
    Thank you Sid
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    You can have an early tea break and
    we'll continue with this later
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    - Please - Yes Zoltan
  • 15:10 - 15:14
    No, you must try to speak! Speak
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    You
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    - Girl - Yes please
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    - No you re not a girl - You
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    Ah, you have a girl friend
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    - l understand, go on - Girl English
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    An English girl
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    - You - Me
  • 15:42 - 15:46
    You want me to write a letter to your girl?
  • 15:46 - 15:47
    Please
  • 15:47 - 15:49
    What do you want me to write?
  • 15:53 - 15:56
    What l write?
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    l think l get the general idea
  • 16:21 - 16:22
    Sidney!
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    Yes Miss Courtney
  • 16:29 - 16:32
    Did you tell Mr. Brown
    l wanted to see him?
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    Yeah definitely
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    l think this should be all right
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    Dear Miss, l'm writing to tell
    you of my feelings for you
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    l think you are beautiful
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    l want to hold you in my arms and kiss you
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    Please say you feel the same about me
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    All my love
  • 16:53 - 16:54
    Yes!
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    Thank you
  • 16:59 - 17:02
    - What is going on here? - Nothing
  • 17:02 - 17:04
    lt certainly didn't sound like nothing
  • 17:05 - 17:08
    l was writing a letter for
    Zoltan to his girl friend
  • 17:08 - 17:10
    He was showing me his
    appreciation in Hungarian
  • 17:11 - 17:12
    Kindly leave us
  • 17:13 - 17:19
    Go, l said go! Go
  • 17:22 - 17:23
    Now Mr. Brown
  • 17:23 - 17:26
    l understand none of your
    previous students
  • 17:26 - 17:27
    Passed their lower
    Cambridge Certificate
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    l think there were a few near misses
  • 17:29 - 17:30
    That's not good enough
  • 17:31 - 17:33
    Obviously Mr. Brown,
    you are sadly lacking
  • 17:33 - 17:35
    ln the necessary
    qualities required to teach English
  • 17:35 - 17:37
    - Just a moment - Don't interrupt
  • 17:37 - 17:40
    l shall be keeping a very close
    eye on you this term, Mr. Brown
  • 17:40 - 17:43
    Unless l see a marked improvement,
    out you go
  • 17:43 - 17:45
    - lt's not... - l have no
    wish to listen to feeble excuses
  • 17:47 - 17:49
    Pompous old cow
  • 17:52 - 17:55
    - What was that?
    - l said l'm just going now
  • 18:01 - 18:03
    Hey, you not speak nothing?
  • 18:05 - 18:08
    He is not knowing the English as
    well as what we are knowing
  • 18:09 - 18:13
    - l speak with him
    - Blimey, he speak Hungryarian
  • 18:15 - 18:18
    Sure l speak Hunarian
  • 18:18 - 18:21
    - Football - Football
  • 18:21 - 18:23
    - Puskas - Pele
  • 18:23 - 18:25
    - Kepkens - Beckenball
  • 18:25 - 18:26
    - Bobby Lee Shutkan - Bobby Lee Moor
  • 18:29 - 18:31
    You see, l told you
    l speak the language
  • 18:33 - 18:35
    You like England?
  • 18:36 - 18:38
    Ya! l also very much like teacher
  • 18:39 - 18:43
    - You not make the eyes at
    Mr. Brown - lf l want l will
  • 18:43 - 18:46
    Mr. Brown does not like the blond ladies
  • 18:47 - 18:49
    Swedish girls are the beautifullest
  • 18:50 - 18:53
    Swedish girls are too big in the bosoms
  • 18:53 - 18:54
    French girls are too big in the mouth
  • 18:56 - 18:59
    ln China, looks are not important
  • 18:59 - 19:00
    lt is brains and intellect that matter
  • 19:01 - 19:03
    - Absolument - Su Lee is right
  • 19:03 - 19:05
    We women are not symbols for sex
  • 19:05 - 19:09
    - You agree Jamila? - l not understand
  • 19:09 - 19:11
    We Women are not here to
    give the men the pleasure
  • 19:13 - 19:15
    l like give men pleasure
  • 19:17 - 19:18
    Trying to find a few winners?
  • 19:19 - 19:22
    No l'm trying to find out if
    l can afford to leave the wife
  • 19:22 - 19:24
    - Pardon? - Premium bonds
  • 19:24 - 19:27
    A hundred thousand pounds!
    l could be lucky
  • 19:27 - 19:28
    Somebody's got to win it
  • 19:28 - 19:29
    - How many bonds have you got? - One
  • 19:30 - 19:32
    You're as bad as me! l've only got one
  • 19:32 - 19:34
    One, double F, two,
    three, two, three, two
  • 19:34 - 19:35
    You've got a good memory
  • 19:36 - 19:37
    lt's not a difficult one
  • 19:37 - 19:39
    One, double F, two,
    three, two, three, two
  • 19:39 - 19:40
    That's right
  • 19:40 - 19:43
    - That's it - That's what?
  • 19:43 - 19:45
    One, double F, two,
    three, two, three, two
  • 19:45 - 19:46
    l don't believe it
  • 19:47 - 19:49
    Are you sure that you
    got the right cucumber?
  • 19:49 - 19:50
    - Cucumber? - The number
  • 19:50 - 19:52
    Positive! Look
  • 19:53 - 19:54
    One, double F, two,
    three, two, three, two
  • 19:54 - 19:56
    That's right! You've won a
    hundred thousand pounds
  • 19:56 - 19:58
    - What are you going to
    do? - What am l going to do
  • 19:58 - 19:59
    Celebrate of course
  • 20:00 - 20:01
    - Gladys - Yes Mr. Brown
  • 20:01 - 20:02
    Coffees all round
  • 20:09 - 20:13
    Everybody please! l want to read
    you all my letter of resignation
  • 20:15 - 20:17
    No, no! l'm definitely resigning
  • 20:17 - 20:20
    With one hundred thousand pounds,
    l no longer need to teach English
  • 20:22 - 20:24
    Dear Dracula
  • 20:26 - 20:27
    This is to inform you
  • 20:27 - 20:31
    That l think you are a rude, obnoxious
    and self-opinionated old dragon
  • 20:33 - 20:35
    And if l ever see you again,
    it will be too soon
  • 20:36 - 20:38
    Yours disrespectfully,
    Jeremy Brown
  • 20:39 - 20:41
    - Ali - Yes please
  • 20:41 - 20:44
    See that Miss Courtney
    gets this straight away
  • 20:45 - 20:45
    Jelly good
  • 20:47 - 20:48
    Thank you
  • 20:49 - 20:52
    - Please - Oh yes Zoltan, your letter
  • 21:00 - 21:02
    Glad, where's Sid's paper?
  • 21:02 - 21:06
    - He went and took it with
    him - Took it with him?
  • 21:06 - 21:08
    - l got a paper Mr. Brown
    - Great Max, thank you
  • 21:09 - 21:13
    Here it is, one hundred thousand pounds
  • 21:14 - 21:17
    Today's number is One E, F, two, three
  • 21:18 - 21:20
    Wait a minute! That's not
    right! lt should be one double F
  • 21:20 - 21:25
    We apologize for the misprint
    printed out early in the day
  • 21:27 - 21:28
    l have not won anything
  • 21:29 - 21:34
    - So you won't be resignating
    after all - Resigning
  • 21:35 - 21:36
    That letter...
  • 21:38 - 21:39
    Hello please
  • 21:40 - 21:41
    Ali, the letter to Miss Courtney
  • 21:42 - 21:43
    - She is not in the office - Thank God
  • 21:44 - 21:46
    Mr. Brown, Mr. Nadim!
    Did you want to see me?
  • 21:46 - 21:48
    - No - Yes please! This is for you
  • 21:48 - 21:49
    Thank you
  • 21:50 - 21:51
    l'd like a word with you Mr. Brown
  • 21:51 - 21:52
    l'll have you in the office
  • 21:56 - 21:57
    Close the door
  • 21:59 - 22:01
    l'll just see what this letter is first
  • 22:01 - 22:04
    l wouldn't do that! You don't know where
    it's been! lt could be full of germs
  • 22:04 - 22:05
    Don't be so ridiculous
  • 22:07 - 22:09
    l seem to recognize this writing
  • 22:09 - 22:11
    lt looks like yours, Mr. Brown
  • 22:12 - 22:13
    No, it's nothing like
    mine! ltjust looks like mine
  • 22:13 - 22:17
    - Well l'd better open it - l think l'll go
  • 22:17 - 22:18
    l haven't finished with you yet
  • 22:18 - 22:19
    You will have when you read that letter
  • 22:19 - 22:21
    - l beg you pardon? - Nothing
  • 22:28 - 22:29
    Good Heavens
  • 22:30 - 22:31
    Miss Courtney
  • 22:31 - 22:33
    l've never read anything like it in my life
  • 22:33 - 22:35
    - l can explain... - Just listen to this
  • 22:35 - 22:36
    l'd rather not
  • 22:38 - 22:41
    Dear Miss, l'm writing to tell
    you of my feelings for you
  • 22:41 - 22:43
    You see l thought l'd won... Pardon?
  • 22:44 - 22:47
    l want to hold you in my
    arms and kiss you
  • 22:49 - 22:51
    You did write this letter Mr. Brown
  • 22:51 - 22:52
    Well l... Not to you
  • 22:52 - 22:55
    lt's the letter you wrote for
    that Hungarian student
  • 22:55 - 22:58
    - Yes, you see what must have
    happened - You don't need to go on
  • 22:58 - 23:02
    Obviously he's been
    smitten by my charm and beauty
  • 23:04 - 23:07
    - Pardon? - l have told
    you before Mr. Brown
  • 23:07 - 23:10
    l do have a strange
    fascination for the opposite sex
  • 23:11 - 23:12
    Oh yes very strange
  • 23:14 - 23:16
    You may not believe this, Mr. Brown
  • 23:17 - 23:21
    But when l was a young
    girl l was very plain
  • 23:29 - 23:30
    A cup of tea Gladys please
  • 23:31 - 23:33
    Everything ok, Mr. Brown?
  • 23:33 - 23:36
    Yes! l must have put Zoltan's letter to his
    girl friend in my envelop to Miss Courtney
  • 23:37 - 23:40
    - He's not going to be very happy
    - Why not?
  • 23:40 - 23:45
    He's gonna give the letter you write
Title:
Mind Your Language Season 2 Episode 1 All Present If Not Correct
Description:

more » « less
Video Language:
English
Duration:
25:04

English subtitles

Revisions