-
Not Synced
<Does Jungto Society
Offer Programs for Children?>
-
Not Synced
Hello, It's nice to see you in person
and not on the weekly class videos.
-
Not Synced
Oh, sorry, I'm supposed to stand.
So I have a question.
-
Not Synced
or if Jungdo Society works with
the children of the families
that are part of the program.
If you've dealt with children,
if you can talk about it,
that would be great.
Thank you.
-
Not Synced
Actually it was a subject matter
experts in dealing with young people.
-
Not Synced
I have a 9 year old son
and he's a really good kid
-
Not Synced
but I did notice that he took after me
and has my temper
-
Not Synced
and will blow up
and then has a very hard time
-
Not Synced
controlling himself and it's getting worse
as he's getting older.
-
Not Synced
And I was wondering if there are any
Buddhism courses for children in Korea
-
Not Synced
So as I got older, my focus shifted
demographic focus shifted to college aged kids
-
Not Synced
and then I got even older.
So in later 20s after college,
-
Not Synced
I'm much older.
So I deal with middle aged people.
-
Not Synced
If I get a little bit older,
I'll be dealing with retirees
-
Not Synced
in the beginning.
When I started this path,
-
Not Synced
I actually dealt a lot with
middle school age kids.
-
Not Synced
That's how it is but my question to you
is that you're living fine right now right
-
Not Synced
though I started
my Buddhism course last year.
-
Not Synced
I'm in Buddhism too now
and I did ask my son recently
-
Not Synced
how he found me to be
and he did say that I am calmer.
-
Not Synced
So I'm hoping to introduce him
to more of the Buddhism practices.
-
Not Synced
But when I ask him to do
meditation with me,
-
Not Synced
he gets very angry because he says
breathing makes him angry
-
Not Synced
in a ways. But you're still fine
overall right your life
-
Not Synced
very much at peace
-
Not Synced
my son your son takes after you.
-
Not Synced
Yes, he has my temper
-
Not Synced
so therefore your son will live
as well as you will.
-
Not Synced
You had a lot of challenges.
you had to deal with as a result of
-
Not Synced
your temper to get to where you are today.
your son will walk the same path.
-
Not Synced
and if you got better,
had more peace of mind
-
Not Synced
because you encounter Buddhist teaching,
your son will do the same
-
Not Synced
but about 40 or 50 years from now.
So no worries there
-
Not Synced
because you like somebody right now
you can't demand that
or impose that on your kid
-
Not Synced
right now you appreciate these teachings
because you have went through
a lot of experiences
that your son has not gone through
this journey yet
there's no way for him
to think this is our judge that this is.
In fact, if you're imposing on it,
then it's going to kind of
have a counter effect
-
Not Synced
in other ways
if you impose it too much,
insist on it becomes more of
a source of trauma for him
then you actually shut that door for him.
-
Not Synced
But if your practice gets better,
deeper and you improve as a person,
then your son's going to watch it
and experience it and see that.
So later on.
when he faces his own difficulties,
he might recall that this worked for you
and so he might try it.
-
Not Synced
Don't ask your son to meditate
or get into Buddhist teaching.
The most effective way is for you
to actually engage more deeply in
your own practice.
-
Not Synced
But at the same time,
you might want to seek
or at least get a professional opinion
for your son.
-
Not Synced
And if the professional medicine,
you know, doctor says,
you know, there's some issues there,
then you can get it treated
-
Not Synced
because early discovery of any symptoms
is always easier to deal with.
-
Not Synced
if the doctor says, he falls within
the normal range,
although, he might be
a little temperamental,
then he'll be fine.
I mean, he'll have to deal with
certain things but he'll be fine.
-
Not Synced
That situation. You becoming calmer is a great example for your son because as a kid, he's very influenced by his circumstances.
-
Not Synced
She's tonger than that
-
Not Synced
whether that's good or bad.
-
Not Synced
There is an old saying in Korea
that you've got to be careful
how you drink water in front of kids
because kids always teach you.
-
Not Synced
So if you improve more
and you develop more of a peace of mind,
you know that you're greatly
influencing yourself.
-
Not Synced
So those of you here with young kids,
below teenagers,
if you instead of demanding
your kids do something,
self transformation is the biggest instruction
or lesson learned for your kids
because kids, they tend to imitate
-
Not Synced
and of course,
they always rebel against any criticism
that you lay on them.
For example, say, come back early,
they'll always ask how come
mom, dad always comes in late
-
Not Synced
if you tell them dinner at 6,
for example,
-
Not Synced
they'll thinking, how come
you didn't eat at 6 last night.
This is how kids act.
You have to do things
together with your kids.
-
Not Synced
So if they do something wrong,
don't scold them.
you just don't do it for them.
-
Not Synced
If you scold them,
you create this injury within.
But if you do
whatever they want you to do,
then he doesn't develop that discipline.
-
Not Synced
You need a wisdom,
a balance in which you don't scold them.
at the same time,
you don't do everything they ask of you.
Kids do not learn
just because you say something once.
And if you have to repeat
yourself 10 times
that you still don't understand,
repeat yourself 11th times.
But we often think
our kids are little adults.
I told you I'm not going to tell you again
I told you twice already
that kid is no longer a kid.
If he acts that way
then he should be an adult.
-
Not Synced
So if you bring that perspective
then you should not have any problems.
-
Not Synced
Thank you for advocating for
mental health as well.