-
Even if you don't understand,
-
you can always support and encourage us
-
Our identity is still legalized
and it exists
-
Not Synced
My name's Cami, I'm 22,
and I'm non-binary
-
Not Synced
and I'm here to talk about non-binary.
-
Not Synced
Non-binary is an umbrella term
-
Not Synced
that includes all gender identities
-
Not Synced
that aren't only male
or only female
-
Not Synced
It can be agender so "a", subtracts,
-
Not Synced
and it means genderless, is neutral,
-
Not Synced
or it can be all fluid identities,
-
Not Synced
as if gender is a spectrum with 2 poles,
-
Not Synced
masculine and feminine.
-
Not Synced
We can have a cursor that moves.
-
Not Synced
Everyone who identifies as gender fluid,
-
Not Synced
demigender, pangender, etc.
-
Not Synced
I never really identified with femininity.
-
Not Synced
At 18, I already started asking myself
-
Not Synced
questions on my gender identity,
-
Not Synced
and I met a trans guy,
-
Not Synced
who I was with for some time,
-
Not Synced
and we put into words my identity,
-
Not Synced
which is non-binary.
-
Not Synced
I think it's because he had much more
-
Not Synced
information than me
-
Not Synced
that he was able to help me find the words
-
Not Synced
about my identity.
-
Not Synced
Gender Identity is what we are.
-
Not Synced
It is the gender we feel,
-
Not Synced
we live with and experiment with.
-
Not Synced
And Gender Expression
-
Not Synced
is what we let other see.
-
Not Synced
It is the way we express our identity.
-
Not Synced
We can have a gender identity
-
Not Synced
for example, male:
-
Not Synced
we're a guy,
-
Not Synced
and we'll have a gender expression
-
Not Synced
that is feminine, with many labels
-
Not Synced
considered feminine in society.
-
Not Synced
For example, Bilal Hassani is a man
-
Not Synced
with a feminine gender expression.
-
Not Synced
I told my parents that I was non-binary
-
Not Synced
and that I wanted to change my first name
at the same time.
-
Not Synced
I was 20, so it was two years ago.
-
Not Synced
My mom took it very well.
-
Not Synced
She was already familiar with
gender issues.
-
Not Synced
She was very deconstructed to the idea
and very safe.
-
Not Synced
I felt safe.
-
Not Synced
With my dad, it was a bit delicate.
-
Not Synced
I took more time to talk to him
-
Not Synced
and I didn't do it in person.
-
Not Synced
I sent him a message
-
Not Synced
because it was simpler for me to handle.
-
Not Synced
He reacted pretty well.
-
Not Synced
He said he didn't understand everything
-
Not Synced
but he'll support me regardless.
-
Not Synced
and that this changes nothing for him
-
Not Synced
that his love for me stays the same.
-
Not Synced
For my grandmother, il was less obvious
-
Not Synced
because it's something farfetched to her.
-
Not Synced
She grew up in the countryside.
Then, she moved to Paris.
-
Not Synced
She lived with my grandfather
for 50 years.
-
Not Synced
She lived in very
cis heteronormative societies.
-
Not Synced
where she never questioned her identity
-
Not Synced
or the identity of others.
-
Not Synced
When I talked to her,
she was a bit bewildered
-
Not Synced
but she always looked out for me
and behaved her best with me.
-
Not Synced
She makes a lot of effort
-
Not Synced
and almost never makes a mistake.
-
Not Synced
when using my first name.
-
Not Synced
I requested to change my first name
in 2019
-
Not Synced
I applied to the city hall where I lived.
-
Not Synced
I filled out the folder
-
Not Synced
with the testimonies
from my family and friends
-
Not Synced
to state that they'll use the name Cami
to address me.
-
Not Synced
I asked my school to write a letter of support for me.
-
Not Synced
Then, I submitted my folder.
-
Not Synced
I waited several months.
-
Not Synced
It varies depending on the city hall.
-
Not Synced
And I got approval to change my first name
-
Not Synced
Misgendering a person
-
Not Synced
is to address this person
with the wrong pronouns,
-
Not Synced
so gendering a non-binary person
-
Not Synced
who clearly said
to use neutral pronouns like "they/them"
-
Not Synced
and to gender them as female or male.
-
Not Synced
Personally, I use she/her pronouns
when speaking and they/them when writing.
-
Not Synced
But it's true that in general,
-
Not Synced
I tend to say immediately
that I prefer others address me
-
Not Synced
with she/her pronouns when speaking.
-
Not Synced
Later if the person doesn't do it
-
Not Synced
and you would prefer
to be sure of their gender,
-
Not Synced
you could ask for them
to specify their pronouns
-
Not Synced
or wait until the person
uses their pronouns
-
Not Synced
to respect their gender.
-
Not Synced
With the others videos I did,
-
Not Synced
there were a lot of comments
that belittled our identities,
-
Not Synced
and denied our gender expressions
and gender identities
-
Not Synced
Afterwards, I hardly read these comments
-
Not Synced
because I knew for the most part
they're malicious or very inconsiderate
-
Not Synced
and they will only hurt me.
-
Not Synced
I already participated in a report
-
Not Synced
where we could hear
that it was a fashion statement
-
Not Synced
that it appeared a few years ago
in the U.S., 10 years ago,
-
Not Synced
and that it had to do with fashion,
unisex fashion, etc.
-
Not Synced
This is completely false.
-
Not Synced
I also think that it's an extremely white
and Eurocentric point of view
-
Not Synced
because in many cultures
we find many gender identities
-
Not Synced
that were completely erased
during colonization.
-
Not Synced
Often we hear that it's problematic,
-
Not Synced
it's annoying to create labels
and more and more labels
-
Not Synced
to identify and reidentify, etc.
-
Not Synced
but I think it is especially crucial
-
Not Synced
to first identify with something
in order to dissociate with an identity
-
Not Synced
that was assigned to us randomly.
-
Not Synced
I think it's necessary
to also find a community
-
Not Synced
to create bonds,
to know that we're not alone,
-
Not Synced
that there is support,
and that there are others like us
-
Not Synced
that understand us,
and who listen.
-
Not Synced
If I could say one thing,
-
Not Synced
I think it would be that
even though you don't understand
-
Not Synced
you can always support and encourage us.
-
Not Synced
You can learn,
you can deconstruct patterns of thinking
-
Not Synced
You can find out more information,
you can help your loved ones,
-
Not Synced
even if you don't understand
the range of their gender identity
-
Not Synced
Secondly, all non-binary people
-
Not Synced
have a different way
of expressing their identity,
-
Not Synced
there are people
who will do medical transitions,
-
Not Synced
who will take hormones, and do operations,
while others won't,
-
Not Synced
and no matter the way we transition or not
socially, medically, etc.
-
Not Synced
Our identity is still legalized
and it exists
-
Not Synced
and there are many, many of us.