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Découverte de la non-binarité : le témoignage de Cami

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    Even if you don't understand
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    you can always support and assist us.
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    Our identity remain legitimate
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    and it exists.
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    My name is Cami, I'm 22 years old,
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    I'm non-binary
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    and I'm here to talk about my identity
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    'Non-binary' is an umbrella term
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    that includes all the identities that are
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    neither exclusively masculine nor feminine
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    That could be agender, with "a" meaning
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    a subtraction without gender.
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    Which is neutral. Or it can be all
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    the fluid identities, as we imagine gender
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    as a spectrum with two poles, masculine
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    and feminine. And there is a cursor
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    which moves. So all people who are
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    genderfluid, demigender, pangender, etc.
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    I never really identified with femininity.
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    At 18, I started to ask myself questions
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    on my gender identity and I met
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    a trans man, who I was with for awhile
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    and we finally put together some words
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    for my identity, so 'non-binary'.
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    I think it's because he had more info
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    than me. He helped me find the words for
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    my identity. Gender identity is what
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    we are. It's the gender we feel, our
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    lives, and what we experiment with.
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    and gender expression is what we present
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    to others. It's the way we express
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    that identity. You could have a gender
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    identity, for example, that's masculine
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    so a man, and you can have a gender
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    expression that is feminine, with markers
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    considered as feminine in society.
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    Like for example, Bilal Hassani, he is
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    a man with a feminine gender expression.
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    I told my parents that I was non binary
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    and that I wanted to change my name also.
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    I was 20, so two years ago
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    and my mom took it quite well.
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    She was already up to date with questions
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    about gender. She deconstructed them
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    and it was safe, I felt secure.
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    For my dad, it was a little bit delicate.
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    I took more time to talk to him
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    and I didn't do it in person. I actually
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    sent him a message, as it was easier
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    for me to manage. And he took it well.
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    He said he didn't understand it all,
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    but he would support me regardless
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    and that it wouldn't change anything
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    for him, he loved me the same.
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    For my grandma, it was less clear,
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    it's something unfamiliar for her.
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    She grew up in the countryside. Then
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    she came to Paris. She lived with
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    my grandpas for 50 years.
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    She lived in very cis heteronormative
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    contexts, where she never asked questions
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    on her identity or of others.
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    So when I talked to her about it, she
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    was caught off guard, but she always
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    tried her best to behave in the best way
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    she can with me. She's make a lot
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    of effort, she doesn't make anymore
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    mistakes with saying my name now.
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    I made an application to chance my name
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    in 2019, I submitted the application to
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    the city where I was living in. I obtained
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    a file that I filled with witnesses from
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    my close friends, to show that they use
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    the name Cami to refer to me. I asked
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    my school to write a letter of support.
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    Then, I submitted my file and waited a
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    few months. The time span varies according
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    to cities. And then I got my name change
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    accepted.
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    The fact of wrongly gendering someone
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    is to address that person while using
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    the wrong pronouns. So using gendered
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    pronouns for a non-binary person who had
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    explicitly said to use neutral pronouns
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    like "them" and to gender them using
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    feminine or masculine pronouns.
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    Personally, I use pronouns referred to
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    as "feminine" when speaking and neutral
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    in writing. But, in general, I have the
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    tendency to say right away that I prefer
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    to use feminine pronouns for speaking.
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    After, if a person doesn't do that
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    for themselves, and you want to be sure
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    you are correctly gendering them,
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    you can ask them for their pronouns
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    or wait until the person refers to
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    themselves to follow their suit.
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    In the videos that I've done previously
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    There was a lot of comments
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    which invalidated our identities
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    and denied our gender expressions
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    and identity. I personally don't read many
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    of those comment since I know they are
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    mostly malicious or ill-intentioned
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    and just want to cause pain.
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    I already participated in a report
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    where we could hear that it's just
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    a trend which came up a few years ago
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    in the US, around 10 years ago.
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    that it had a connection to fashion also,
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    and unisex fashion, etc.
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    That is completely false, I think that
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    it's also a very white perspective
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    and very Eurocentric.
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    because in many cultures, we will find
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    many gender identities that were totally
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    erased during colonization.
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    Oftentimes, we hear that it's problematic
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    or it's annoying to recreate more and more
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    ways to identify ourselves, but I think
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    it is very important to be able to,
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    mainly identify as something so
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    to unidentify from an identity that
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    was assigned to us arbitrarily.
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    I think it's also necessary to find
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    a community to create connections, to know
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    you're not alone, where there is support,
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    and where there are others who are like us
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    who know and listen to us.
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    If I had one single thing to say, I think
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    it would be that even if you don't
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    understand, you can always support
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    and assist us. You can learn, you can
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    deconstruct your ways of thinking.
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    You can educate yourself, you can help
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    your close friends, even if you don't
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    understand their whole gender identity.
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    Another thing, all non-binary people have
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    different ways of expressing their
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    identity, there are some who want to do
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    medicals transitions, take hormones,
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    who will do surgery operations, while
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    others won't, but no matter the way you
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    transition or not socially or medically,
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    our identities remain legitimate,
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    they exist, and there are many of us.
Title:
Découverte de la non-binarité : le témoignage de Cami
Description:

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Video Language:
French
Duration:
05:55

Creole, Haitian subtitles

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