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Découverte de la non-binarité : le témoignage de Cami

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    Even if you don’t understand,
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    You can always support and accompany.
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    Our identity stays legitimate
    and it exists
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    My name is Cami, I’m 22, I’m nonbinary
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    And I’m here to talk about nonbinarity.
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    “Nonbinary” is an umbrella term
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    That groups together all gender identities
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    That are neither exclusively masculine
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    Or exclusively feminine.
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    It can be agender so “a”,
    the subtraction,
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    Without gender, that is neutral,
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    Or it can be all of the fluid identities
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    Like if we imagined gender as
    a spectrum with two poles
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    The masculine and the feminine.
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    We can have a moving cursor.
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    All the people who are genderfluid,
    demigender, pangender, etc
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    I never really identified with femininity.
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    At 18 I was already starting
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    To ask myself questions
    on my gender identity
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    And I met a trans man
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    With whom I was with for a little while
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    And together we were able
    to place a label on my identity
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    Which was nonbinary.
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    And I think it’s because
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    He had a lot more information than I did
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    That he knew how to help me find
    the words concerning my identity
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    Gender identity is what we are,
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    The gender we feel,
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    That we live and experiment with,
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    And gender expression
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    Is what others see,
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    It’s the way we express this identity.
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    We can have a gender identity
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    For example, masculine:
    A man,
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    With a gender expression
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    That is feminine, with a lot of traits
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    Considered feminine in society.
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    For example Bilal Hassani, who is a man
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    With a feminine gender expression.
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    I told my parents I was nonbinary
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    And that I wanted to change my name
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    At the same time.
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    I was 20, so that was 2 years ago,
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    And my mom took it well.
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    She was already very up to date
    with gender questioning topics
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    She was pretty deconstructed
    and safe to talk to.
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    I felt safe.
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    It was slightly more delicate with my dad.
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    It took me a little longer to tell him.
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    And I didn’t do it
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    Face to face,
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    I sent him a message
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    Because it was easier for me
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    And he reacted pretty well.
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    He said he didn’t understand everything
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    But that he’ll be there for me
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    And that it won’t change anything for him,
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    That he still loves me.
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    For my grandmother,
    it was a little harder.
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    Because it was something less familiar
    to her
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    She grew up in the country,
    then moved to Paris
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    She lived with my grandfather for 50 years
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    She was in very
    cis heteronormative contexts
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    Where different gender identities
    had never crossed her mind
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    Same goes for others’ identities
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    So when I told her,
    it’s safe to say she was confused
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    But she always made sure
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    To behave
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    In the best way possible with me
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    She made a lot of efforts
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    Now, she rarely makes mistakes
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    With my chosen name
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    I applied for a name change
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    In 2019
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    I applied
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    At the city hall in my town
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    I filled out a form
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    With witness statements
    from my close ones
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    To say they used “Cami”
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    When talking to and about me
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    I asked my school for a letter as well
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    Then I gave them the form
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    And waited a few months
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    It depends on the cities
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    Then I got a confirmation
    for my name change.
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    Misgendering someone
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    Is when you talk to them
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    Using the wrong pronouns.
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    So gendering a nonbinary person
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    Who would’ve explicitly said
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    To use neutral pronouns, like “they”,
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    And gendering them with feminine
    or masculine pronouns.
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    Personally I use the pronouns
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    Considered feminine when speaking,
    and the neutral ones on paper
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    And it’s true that in general,
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    I tend to say it right away
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    That I prefer getting addressed
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    With feminine pronouns out loud
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    Then if the person doesn’t do it
    themselves
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    And you want to make sure,
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    You can ask them their pronouns
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    Or wait for them to gender themselves
    in front of you
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    To respect their identity .
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    In previous videos I’ve made,
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    There were a lot of comments
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    Invalidating our identities,
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    Denying our gender expression
    and identity.
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    I don’t really read those ones
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    Just cause I know that for the most part,
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    They don’t mean well,
    or are very, very insensitive
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    And will just hurt me.
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    One time I participated in a report
    where they said
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    It was a trend.
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    That it had only appeared a few years ago,
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    In the States, 10 years ago,
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    That it was related to fashion,
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    Unisex fashion, etc.
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    That’s completely false.
    I think it’s also
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    A really white and eurocentric
    point of view
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    Because in a lot of cultures,
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    You can find many gender identities
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    That were fully erased
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    During colonisation.
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    We often hear it’s problematic,
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    It’s embarrassing to recreate
    cases and cases
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    To identify and re-identify with
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    But I think it’s really important
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    To be able to identify with something
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    To de-identify from an identity
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    That was arbitrarily assigned.
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    I think it’s necessary
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    To find yourself in a community
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    To make links, know you are not alone,
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    That there’s support,
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    That there’s others that are like us
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    That listen and understand.
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    If there was one thing I’d wanna say,
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    I think that even if you don’t understand,
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    You can always support and accompany
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    You can learn, deconstruct
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    Old-fashion mindsets.
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    You can seek information,
    help your loved ones,
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    Even if you don’t understand
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    Whatever comes with their gender identity.
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    A second thing is that
    all nonbinary people
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    Express themselves differently,
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    That there are people that will go through
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    Medical transitions,
    that will take hormones,
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    That will get surgery,
    and some others won’t.
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    And whatever way
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    One will transition, or not,
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    Socially, medically, etc,
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    Our identity stays legitimate
    and it exists,
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    And there are many of us.
Title:
Découverte de la non-binarité : le témoignage de Cami
Description:

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Video Language:
French
Duration:
05:55

Korean subtitles

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