Animals Should Definitely Not Wear Clothing

Dan (in ASL): This book is called "Animals

Definitely Should Not Wear Clothing.

The book is written by Judi Barrett. The Illustrator's

name is Roy Barrett.

"Animals definitely should not wear clothing."

"For example, if you have a porcupine, you know

that spiny animal with lots of quills,

"Suppose you gave that porcupine a nice shirt,

what whould happen?"

"It would get totally destroyed!"

"The quills would poke through the shirt and

destroy it."

"So you can't give a porcupine a shirt."

"Suppose you gave a camel

a hat - what would it do with it?"

"Maybe it'd get confused!"

"It might put it on its head or maybe on one of its

humps!"

"So you can't give a hat to a camel."

"Suppose you have a snake. If you give it

pants, what would happen? Would the pants sta

on the snake? No way!"

"The snake would crawl right out of the pants

and leave them behind - whoops!

"So you can't give a snake clothes."

"If you have a mouse, maybe you'd think, what

a lovely hat I have, let me give it to the mouse.

So you put it on, but wait!

"Where's the mouse? Oh, oh! There it is.

The mouse is too small, and the hat covered it.

So you can't give a mouse a hat."

Ah, here we have a sheep.

You know, it already has thick, curly, warm wool.

If you gave it a scarf, a hat, a sweater,

and bundled it up tight, boy, that would be too hot!

The poor thing would be sweating and sweating.

So you shouldn't give a sheep clothes, either.

Next we have a pig.

You know, the pig is a nice clean animal

Always clean and well-mannered.

No way. So if you gave it some formal dress,

like a tie and button down shirt, do you think it'd

stay clean?

Nope - that pig is sloppy, going to be rolling in the

dirt and getting food all over itself.

So you can't give a pig clean clothes like that.

Here's a chicken - you know what they do every

day, right? Laying eggs, that's their routine.

Now, suppose you gave a chicken some lovely

pants to wear - do you think it could continue to

lay eggs? No chance - the eggs would get stuck in

her pants!

So you really can't give a chicken clothes.

You know the animal called a kangaroo? It

hops along and has a little pouch for the baby on

its stomach?

Suppose you gave it a jacket with pockets on

the side. But that animal already has a pouch

for its baby to ride in. What does it need those

extra pockets for?! Forget it.

Don't give a kangaroo a coat with extra pockets.

Here's a giraffe - you know, with a really long neck.

If you gave it a coat with a tie, it has such a lon

neck, how many ties would you give it?

It would look ridiculous! You don't need to give a

giraffe clothes like a coat and tie.

If you give clothes to a goat, what would it do?

Eat it! Because, of course, goats have a habit of

eating clothes! So you might give it clothes, and

suddenly they're gone, destroyed.

Because the goat ate it.

So you can't give a goat clothing.

(ACHOO!) Excuse me.

Here's another animal, a walrus, with long tusks

that swims in the ocean.

If you gave fancy clothes to that walrus, a tie,

hat, and coat, would it stay dry?

Definitely not. Once you gave the clothes to the

walrus, he'd hop right into the water for a swim!

Everything would get soaked and stay soggy.

You can't give a walrus clothes.

If you gave pants with suspenders to a moose,

what do you think the moose would do with it?

It might hang the suspenders on its antlers!

And then it would be totally stuck.

So a moose can't use suspenders.

Here's an animal called an opossum, that likes

to hang upside down.

Suppose you gave the oppossum some clothes

while it's hanging there, how do you think you'd

do it? Since it's hanging upside down, which way

do you put the clothes on?

And last, if you provide clothing for an elephant,

an elegant hat and blouse, and a woman strolls up

who's wearing the same clothing, how embarassing

that would be!

So you can't give clothing to animals, absolutely not!

That's it - hooray.