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Découverte de la non-binarité : le témoignage de Cami

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    Even if you don’t understand,
    you can still be there for us.
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    Our identity is valid.
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    It's real and it matters.
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    I'm Cami, I'm 22, non-binary.
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    I'm here to talk to you
    about non-binarity.
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    Non-binarity is an umbrella term
    for gender identities
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    beyond male/female.
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    That could mean being agender,
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    having no gender, being neutral.
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    Or identities that shift.
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    Imagine gender as a spectrum
    with male and female poles.
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    Some people move along the spectrum.
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    Like genderfluid, demigender,
    pangender people, and so on.
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    I never really felt
    connected to femininity.
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    At 18, I began questioning
    my gender identity.
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    I met a trans man I was with for a while,
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    and together we found the words to name
    my identity: non-binary.
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    He had more knowledge than I did,
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    so he helped me find the words.
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    Gender identity is who we are.
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    It’s how we feel and experience.
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    Gender expression is what
    we show to others.
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    It's how we express our gender identity.
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    Someone might identify as male,
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    but express their gender
    in a feminine way
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    with markers seen as feminine in society.
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    Like Bilal Hassani, a man
    with a feminine gender expression.
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    I told my parents I was non-binary.
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    I also said I wanted to change my name.
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    I was 20, so that was two years ago.
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    My mom took it really well,
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    as she was already aware of gender issues.
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    She was open-minded and supportive.
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    I felt really safe.
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    With my dad, it was a bit harder.
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    I took longer to talk to him about it.
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    I didn’t tell him in person.
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    I messaged him, it was easier that way.
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    He took it pretty well.
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    He didn’t get it all,
    but he’d still be there to support me.
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    It changed nothing for him,
    he still loved me.
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    It was tougher with my grandma
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    because this was all new to her.
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    She grew up rural and moved to Paris.
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    She lived with my grandfather
    for 50 years.
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    Her world was cis-heteronormative,
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    never questioning gender identities.
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    When I told her, she was a bit shocked.
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    But she always tried
    to treat me the best she could.
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    She’s made a huge effort.
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    She almost never gets
    my chosen name wrong now.
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    I requested a name change in 2019.
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    I applied at the town hall
    where I was living.
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    I picked up a form and filled it out
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    with testimonials from loved ones
    who used “Camille” for me.
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    I also got a supporting letter
    from my school.
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    Then I submitted everything
    and waited a few months.
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    It depends on the city, honestly.
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    But mine was eventually approved.
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    Misgendering someone means
    using the wrong pronouns to address them.
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    If a non-binary person asks for
    neutral pronouns like “they”
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    and you call them he or she,
    that’s still misgendering.
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    Personally, I use feminine pronouns
    when speaking, neutral when writing.
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    I usually mention my pronouns upfront.
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    I prefer people use she/her
    for me when speaking.
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    If they don’t do it first,
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    and you want to get it right,
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    you can directly ask someone
    or wait to hear the pronouns they use.
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    On videos I’ve posted before,
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    there were lots of comments
    denying our identities,
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    rejecting our gender expressions
    and identities.
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    I don’t read them much,
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    because most are just mean-spirited
    or just really awkward.
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    They only end up hurting me.
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    I was in a documentary
    where they said it was just a trend.
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    That it started in the U.S.
    about ten years ago,
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    and was really just tied
    to unisex fashion.
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    That's totally false.
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    I think that’s a very white,
    Eurocentric point of view.
Title:
Découverte de la non-binarité : le témoignage de Cami
Description:

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Video Language:
French
Duration:
05:55

Chinese, Simplified subtitles

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