Anger Management Group session

Counselor: Um, so why are you
here today?

You don't know?

Woman 1: Because I'm angry,
according to my best friend.

Counselor: Okay.

How about you?

Man 1: Some dumb judge sent me here.

Counselor: And yourself?

Woman 2: He doesn't want to talk about
it I guess.

Counselor: How about you?

Woman 2: Because my momma made me
because she thinks I'm angry.

She's thinks I have anger issues,
but I don't.

Counselor: Okay, so let me ask
about feelings.

Do you all feel like maybe, you might
have a slight anger problem.

Woman 2: No!

It's not my fault, people piss me off,
and they do stupid things and they

get in my way, and they make me angry!

Counselor: Maybe you should try to
control yourself, count to three,

count to ten?

Woman 2: I can't count to ten.

Why can't I just punch you in
the face?

Counselor: Because that's not what we
do in society.

[coughing]

Woman 2: I can do it I don't care.

[cough]

Man 1: T-that's why I'm here too.

Counselor: You're not supposed to do that.

You can- there's other ways you can take
out your anger.

You can, er-sorry y'all are not, um,
there's other ways you can take out

frustrating feelings, you can go, you can
go for a run, you can exercise.

Woman 2: I don't like working out.

Counselor: There's many options, there's
and array of options.

You can- you can paint.

Woman 2: I don't like painting.

Counselor: Um, what's one of the things
you like to do?

Woman 1: Nothing.

Man 1: She likes to swing that chair
I'll tell you that.

Counselor: How about yourself?

Man 1: Me?

Woman 2: Let's punch every one!

Man 1: My favorite thing is cursing at
people who cut me off.

Woman 2: Absolutely!

Man 1: Right?

Woman 2: Yeah!

Counselor: So, lets- what's a positive thing
that y'all like to do in your spare time.

Woman 1: How long is this session?

Counselor: It is going to last an hour.

Woman 2: I'm hungry!

Counselor: I understand-

Man 2: I don't want to be here.

Woman 1: I totally agree.

Counselor: You can go have lunch, you can
do your business, whatever you need to do.

Woman 2: I just think it's very dumb my
mother sent me here, I don't have to be here!

Counselor: Why do you-
why do you scream?

Why are you frustrated?

Woman 2: Because I'm really mad, I don't
want to be here!

Counselor: You think that's the right way
to-

Woman 2: I'm expressing myself.

I like screaming.

I'm expressing how I feel.

Counselor: Okay.

So, like I was mentioning, there-there's a
lot of different ways y'all can take out

your frustration so you don't necessarily
have to scream.

You don't have to punch things.

You can, like I said, work out, paint, I
don't know, go walk your dog.

Find-find something that you like.

And go do that instead of being angry,
instead of finding frustrating feelings

that will then get you back.

Do you guys want to share what causes
this anger?

Woman 2: No.

Man 1: Dumb people.

Woman 1: My husband.

Counselor: What does your husband do?

Woman 1: He thinks I'm his slave.

He wants me to clean up after him and
it makes me so mad.

Counselor: See, in cases like that, you
can just, have you tried talking to him?

Woman 1: I did, yeah, h-he keeps doing
the same thing.

I told him already stop leaving his shoes
on the floor, and he just, just doesn't get it.

Counselor: Maybe you can just, let it go.

Woman 1: Trust me I've tried it.

Counselor: You can, just don't let it
bother you, do-pretend it's not there.

And then you do, continue on your day, do
whatever you have to do

to get through the day.

How about yourself?

Man 1: What about me?

Counselor: What's your anger issue?

Man 1: Dumbass drivers cut me off,
everywhere, I have some where I gotta

be, and they cut me off?!

Of course I'm going to chase you down.

You don't do that to me!

Counselor: That's not- that's not practicing
safe driving, you need to follow the speed limit.

If they're going fast and they're cutting
you off, let that be it, let them-

Man 1: How am I supposed to practice safe
driving if they're cutting me off?

They're not practicing safe driving!

Counselor: Ignore, ignore the world, like
you continue being safe, and, let the-

don't, don't get frustrated, if they want
to go crash, let 'em crash.

Man 1: Let me cut you off, let's see
how you-

Counselor: No, let me end it there, no.

What you're going to do is, you're
going to count to 20, and, cool off.

If you're still upset after you count to
20, then count to 100.

If, you're at 100, you're still mad,
then continue to count.

So, okay, um, let's see what else.

Um, so now, it is getting close to ending
the session, it has been a great session today.

Do you all agree?

Woman 2: No!

Man 1: No.

Counselor: Okay, so I can see you
all continue to get upset so what

I'm going to do is give you all and
assignment.

Um, it's going to-

Woman 2: Is this like school?!

Counselor: No, t-this is to help you out
of, uh, it's not like school.

And, this is for your personal.

Okay, so I'm going to give y'all this-
or, can you just pass it down please?

Um, everybody take one.

Counselor: Thank you.

Okay so, what y'all are going to do
is every time from now on you walk

out this door, you're going to write
everything that upsets you.

So, when I see y'all next time at the
next session, we will go over this, okay?

Does this sound like a, uh, good plan?

Woman 1: I have no choice.

Man 1: It's whatever.

Woman 2: Can I go?!

Man 2: I'm out.

Counselor: Okay, so y'all are dismissed
see you-

[overlapping chatter]

Woman 1: Bye.

And your office is fucking dirty.