An Englishman Abroad (1983) (TV Movie)

♪ (music) ♪

♪ Who, stole my heart away ♪

♪ Who, makes me dream all day ♪

♪ Dreams I know can never be true ♪

♪ Seems as though I'll ever be blue ♪

♪ Who, means my happiness ♪

♪ Who, would I answer yes to ♪

♪ Well, you ought to guess who ♪

♪ No one but you ♪

♪ (crescendo) ♪

♪ ( diminuendo) ♪

♪ (Welcome gong and trumpets) ♪
[Hamlet playing]

(King Claudius)
Welcome, dear Rosencrantz and Guildenstern

Moreover that we much did long to see you,

The need we have to use you did provoke

Our hasty sending.

Something have you heard

Of Hamlet’s transformation;

so call it,

Sith, nor the exterior nor the inward man

Resembles that it was.

What it should be,

More than his father’s death,

that thus hath put him

So much from the understanding of himself,

I cannot dream of:

I entreat you both,

That, being of so young days
brought up with him,

And sith so neighbor'd
to his youth and humor,

That you vouchsafe
your rest here in our court

Some little time:
- Look, mister, sit down properly.

so by your companies
- You're in the theater, not in a pub.

To draw him on to pleasures,

and to gather,

So much as from occasion you may glean,

Whether aught, unknown to us,

afflicts him thus,

That, open'd,

lies within our remedy.

(Queen Gertrude)
Good gentlemen,

he hath much talk'd of you;

And sure I am two men there is not living

To whom he more adheres.

If it will please you

To show us so much gentry and goodwill

As to expend your time with us awhile,

For the supply and profit of our hope,

Your visitation shall receive such thanks

As fits a king’s remembrance.

(Rosencratz) Both your majesties, might

Might, by the sovereign power

you have of us,

Put your dread pleasures more into command

Than to entreaty.

(Guildenstern) But we both obey,
And here give up ourselves, in full bent

- Guy: What a pleasure

in this day and age to hear the language
so beautifully spoken.

[play inaudible]

Dear, dear, I'm not walking out.
I just have to be able to piss, you see.

(Gertrude)
Thanks, genle Guildenstern and Rosencrantz

And I beseech you instantly

Wait and listen.

(Gertrude) Go some of you,

And bring these gentlemen where Hamlet is.

(Guildenstern)
Heavens make our presence and practices...

[Clearing throat]

[footsteps]

Going to the… excuse me.

Hmm..

Gosh!

What is this? This is shameful.

What is this?

[footsteps]

♪ Our hope for years to come ♪

♪ Our shelter from the stormy blast ♪

♪ And our eternal home. ♪

♪ Before the hills in order stood ♪

No soap.

There's never any soap!

There is no soap, why?

We weren't given soap, that's why!

Do I want to be sick?

Huh?

No, no, not yet.

Hmm.

You know,

you remind me of a stalker I once knew.

♪ (Music) ♪

[Applause]

[sound of a door being opened]

♪ (music) ♪

My dear lady,

I do assure you,

one is an old friend of the leading actor.

We were at Cambridge together.

Young men together at university.

They've come such a long way
one simply must

put one's head around the door.

Your pass, please.

Otherwise, you won't get in.

My Pass? Well, my Pass...

I'm sure I'm not the first person

to remark your pronounced resemblance
to the late Ernest Bevin.

It is most striking.
- ...your light bulb's burned out.

You could be sisters.

Yes shocking like this, I know...
but quite amusing.

Mmm-hmm.

Do I look such a tremendous villain?

And a special news.

Oh, uh, do hurry....
One is not feeling at all well.

Oh, dear.Thank you.

[buzzer rings]

Thank you.
(coughs)

[sound of the door closing]

♪ (music) ♪

afdsagkjagh

♪ (unsettling music) ♪

[muffled nausea sound]

[sigh]

The drink, the drink.

[door bangs]

It is the drink!

[sound of puking]

Aren't you feeling well?

[clears throat]

Yes, thank you.

I am perfectly all right.
[is sick again]

Well, I'll get the woman.

[knocking on the door]

I'm in a French faux.

Oh, run that tap, for God's sake.

Oh, yes.

I wouldn't care,
but it's only the interval.

If you want to come round and be sick

you might at least save it
for the end of the performance.

Oh!

Pears soap!

Who are you?

And who is that boy outside?

Boy?

Outside?

[sound of footsteps]

I do not know.

I haven't seen that one before.

Could I have one of these?

[sighs]

I love your frock.

You are very rude.
Are you from the embassy?

Not exactly.

Well, there can't be many other Englishmen
in Moscow, who are you?

I was at Cambridge with Hamlet.

Well, why don't we tell him you're here?

He's only down the corridor.

All in good time.

The question is, you see
are we as welcome as ever?

I know your face.

Craven A, for your throat's sake, Mmm.

Are you enjoying the play?

I'm adoring it.

I like the local Laertes.

He goes rather well into times.

Yes, that's what he thinks.

It looks as if he's put a couple of
King Edwards down there.

[laughs]

How do you like Moscow?

Oh, loathe it, darling.

I cannot understand
what those Three Sisters are on about.

It gives the play a very sinister slant.

Act II begins, please.

Ah, a drink would help.

Begin Act II, please.

Don't you think you've had enough?

All right.

If you're not at the embassy,
what do you do?

I liaise.

Are you press?

Sort of.

You're not feeling sick again?

Don't know, uh, think I am, rather

Oh, God!

A lesson I've learned in life
is that when one is sick

it's always in threes.
[3 knocks]

Your call please, Miss Browne.

Yes, here it comes.

[puking sound]

Oh, God!
[puking sound]

I'll send somebody in.

[banging]

Miss Browne, your call!

I must go.

Oh God!

Do try to feel better.

And go home.

Yes.
[pukes again]

[music]

[sound of door opening]

[music]

[sound of door closing]

[music]

- Oh, I'm so sorry...
- I'm a sloppy one. [russian?]

Guy.

Guy!

...his own petard: and 't shall go hard.

But I will delve
one yard below their mines,

And blow them at the moon:

When in one line two crafts directly meet.
[2 persons whispering amongst themselves]

[inaudible] I am delighted, good.

Quiet please, shhh.

This man must set me packing:

I'll lug the guts into the neighbour room.

Mother, good night.

Indeed...

this counsellor

Is now most still, most secret
and most grave,

Where is Charles?

Who was in life

a foolish prating knave.

Come, sir,

to draw toward an end with you.

You're cutting fine, darling.

Guess who I've just seen
coming down the corridor?

Who?

Guy Burgess

Who?

Guy Burgess, dear.

The spy.

The missing diplomat.

♪ (music) ♪

Ah, my good lord,
what have I seen tonight!

What, Gertrude? How does Hamlet?

Guy Burgess?

How does Hamlet?

Mad as the sea...

Mad as the seas and wind when both contend
Which is the mightier:

in his lawless fit,
Behind the arras hearing something stir,

Whips out his rapier, cries,
"A rat, a rat!"

And, in his brainish apprehension, kills
The unseen good old man.

Oh, heavy deed!

It had been so with us had we been there.

His liberty is full of threats to all;

To you yourself, to us, to everyone.

♪ (music) ♪

(applause)

- Why?
- No!

I don't want my mind broadened.

I'd not eat cabbage for breakfast at home.
Why'd I eat it here?

Well, it's good that I like beetroot,

Otherwise I'd be reduced to
skin and bones.

Do not push, Madam.

Mum must be the word, truly.

Why?

Well, we don't want anyone
ringing "The Express."

Give way.

If anyone's going to eat tonight,
knock on my door.

He's got fatter.

You knew him?

Oh, I used to run across him years ago,

the way one does, you know...

You're rather that way, aren't you?

What way?

Left.

Oh. I was. Everyone was in those days.

I like him.

Despite the fact
that he was sick in my basin.

Really?

Bags of charm.

Yes.

But you're right, I wouldn't set
The Express on my worst enemy

Drink?

I'd love one.

It's gone!

My drink!

My cigarettes.

My soap!

Huh! That stinker!

Bags of charm...

(keys clinking)

Thank you.

(footsteps)

Nightcap?

Please!

(sound of door opening)

Hot, hot, hot.

Is your room hotter?

Boiling!

I am sure it's all part of the cold war...

No plug.

Secret store.

(sound of cupboard being closed)

(footsteps and glass clinking)

Oh!

(sound of glasses on the table)

Have you found any bugs?

Come again?

Bugs!

Have you found any bugs?

Bugs? No, mine is very clean.

(glasses clinking)

Oh.

Wonderful rooms!

Every convenience.

All same.

I have but one complaint.

Oh, what is that, pray?

Well, in view of the splendid achievements

Of the Union of
Soviet Socialist Republics.

I think, at least, they might want to
plug the base...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

What?

It's like playing Private lives
to a Wednesday matinee in Oldham.

Ha ha ha ha...

I'll tell you something else.

Mmm?

You can go off caviar.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...

(sound of note sliding under the door)

(sound of door being closed)

Who came?

[russian]

[russian]

(footsteps)

[russian]

Thank you.

(sound of receding footsteps)

(sound of plug being fixed)

(sound of running water)

♪ (music) ♪

(cups clinking)

♪ (music) ♪

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

Please, how do I get there?

[russian]

[russian]

Well, somebody must be able
to tell me how to get there.

[russian]

This is ridiculous.

Haven't you got
a street directory an A to Z?

[russian]

Can I get a taxi?

No taxi.

Do you have trouble?

Oh no.

No.

Taxi!

Ta—

♪ (music) ♪

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

Excuse me, do you know where this is?

[russian]

Thank you.

[russian]

[russian]

[russian]

♪ (music) ♪

♪ (lively music) ♪

♪ (increase in tempo of music) ♪

I just want to know where the place is.
How do I get there?

I thought that's what embassies were for.

You have to remember,
the gentleman in question was a spy.

In England he'd be languishing in jail.

You'd rather, languishing here actually.
Ha!

Bring a tape measure.

Bring a tape measure?

Mr Burgess has asked me to lunch.

With a tape measure?

Watching his waistline.

Well, you can not stop me
from going to lunch. It is a free country.

Rather, it is.

Have lunch here.

It's Tuesday.

xxxxxxxxx is delicious

It's Tuesday.
xxxxx xxxxxxxxx

Tessa doesn't think we take it seriously.

Was he a chum of yours?

He popped by my dressing room
last night and threw up in the basin.

It was love at first sight.

First impressions are always best.

You never had any contact with him before?

No.

You didn't meet him
when he was at the Foreign Office?

No.

On the BBC?

No.

What about Maclean?

No!

Odd he should come
into your dressing room!

Ladies aren't exactly his like.

Are they yours?

Of course, if all he wanted
was to be sick, that would figure.

He was coming around
to see one of the actors.

Which one?

You're not being paid
for The Daily Express, are you?

They're very keen to get a hold of him.

I should give up the idea.
Have lunch with us. Come on.

I have no intention of having
lunch with you.

He has asked me to call.

(sounds of the typewriter)

Do you know where this is?

Oh, Tessa does not know, do you, Tessa?

Tessa's such a skinny.

Tessa's ambition is just marking time

until her face is on the front page
of Country Life.

after the advertisements

for gateleg tables.

(sounds of the typewriter)

Stalin is dead.

Exchanges are taking place.

You, the Old Vic.

Not overtures, I admit.

But the tuning up,
preparatory to the overtures

For the first time in 10 years,
we're on speaking terms

Our friends, the foe,

are just beginning to play ball.

We don't want them
to take the bat home, do we?

Burgess and Maclean,
they're yesterday's breakfast.

We wanted to get them,
the Russians want to forget them.

The thing is,
we do not want any fuss at this point.

No scenes.

This is grown-up stuff.

I am going to lunch.

A quiet little meal.

I am an actress.

All actresses are fools,
it's a well established fact.

Why should there be any fuss?

May I just take the note?

Certainly not. The impudence!

Oh, do stay to lunch,
there'll be jokes.

Yes, Giles knows lots of jokes.

Only we have heard them all.

New people make such a change.

Tessa wants you to stay.
Don't you, Tessa?

I think you're both shits.

I was only teasing! Oh God!

That means that we won't be on speakers
for a week.

Well, thank you for all your help.

Oh, do not bother to show me out.

Enjoy your Kedgeree.

Show me that address.

Tessa!

Naughty.

Sorry.

Oh...

Thank you.

Forgive?

From the bank and from the river
He flashed into the crystal mirror,

‘Tirra lira,’ by the river
Sang Sir Lancelot.

She left the web, she left the loom,
She made three paces through the room,

She saw the water-lily bloom,
She saw the helmet and the plume,

She looked down to Camelot.
Out flew the web and floated wide ;
The mirror cracked from side to side ;

‘The curse is come upon me,’ cried
The Lady of Shalott.

I have walked through the middle of Russia
to get here.

Oh, dear!

I guess that's my soap.

It is, it is, and very good.

Now, have a seat.

What a wonderful coat.

We are already here.

I have been ordering.

Here, have a drink?

You know, quite honestly,
I thought that you would leave me planted.

I nearly did. You steal my soap,
you steal my cigarettes,

you even stole my face powder.

I know, I know. One should have asked.
One is such a coward.

Good, hard to live in abundance.
In fact, almost a swine.

You know, I used to live
on Jermyn Street.

Tragic, you can think. Well, not really.

That was a pigsty, too.

Knows for its standards,
is quite palaciego.Casi very spacious.

One is very lucky.

If it is our lunch,
it is burning.

Oh, oh, dear. Oh yeah.

Can one salvage some of it?

No.

Ah! All is not lost.
I managed to squeeze two tomatoes.

And, a topic of discussion,
a grapefruit.

Treats.
- Have a seat.

- Garlic?
- No. thank you.

I love it!

Well, tell me all the gossip.

Do you see Harold Nicolson?

He, uh...
I've seen him, but I do not know him.

Oh! Nice man, nice man

What about Cyril Connolly?
He is everywhere.

Well, I have not run across him either.

Oh! Somehow, one remembers everyone knowing everyone else.

Everyone I knew, knew all the others.
Auden, do you know him?

Pope-Hennessy?

The theater is in a terrible state.

The three plays closed in Shaftue
in one week.

Really?

A ballet on ice is coming here.
All the comrades are nervous about it.

I am rather old-fashioned about ice.

I used to drive in Cambridge, you know.

One thinks about the past and wonders
maybe I lost my way.

You are not eating your tomato?

Well, I'm not hungry.

Oh, I do. Yum, yum. Mmm.

There.

- Mmm. "Do you see a lot of people here?"

Oh, yes. Montones of friends.

Do not know what you are missing
with this tomato.

There is a half orange,
I suppose.

What? Oh yeah. Hmm.

He is a virtuoso of the balalaika.
We play duets.

Maclean?

Maclean? Oh no.

Maclean is not my friend. "No, honey, oh, no. No no.

No, no, he's so serious.
No jokes, no jokes at all.

Positively the last person
that I would have chosen

if I had had a choice.

And yet we are here in this
terrible tandem together, you see

Debenham and Freebody.

Crosse and Blackwell.

Auden and Isherwood.

Burgess and Maclean.

Do you know Auden?

You asked me. No.

Do not look.
The seeds get inside my plate.

You know, people ask me
if I have any regrets

The one regret I have
is that before I came away

I did not get a good pair of
National Health teeth.

Admirable as most things are
in the Soviet Socialist Republic,

making of dentures
is still in its infancy.

Hmm.

You know, there is no one in Moscow at all.

It's rather like staying in Cambridge
during long vacations.

I settle with anyone who is around here.

Me.

= No, no, no, no, no.

Besides, I asked you here for a reason.

Did you bring a tape measure?

I want you to measure me
for some suits for my tailor.

I only have one suit
the one I came away.

And I've fallen down a lot since then.

But I shan't know where to start - what measurements will he want?

Oh, measure it all, he will work it out.
He is a nice man.

Won't your people here
get you a suit?

What people?

The authorities.

Oh, yes, but have you seen them?

Clothing has never been the strong point
of the comrades.

Besides, I do not want to look like everybody else, right?

But, I seem to remember how it is done.

Your arms can not have changed.

You know, I never cared for cumin
the clothes before.

I always wore traditional clothes
in my class, you know.

Black coat, striped trousers, diplomatic
stripe suits, tweeds on weekends.

Shit order, of course.
Always in shit order.

But lovely, I always had charm.

"Well, you still have charm," she said through clenched teeth.

Not here, not for them.

For charm one needs words,
I have no words.

And without my clothes, I have no class.

For them, I am the Englishman.

You would want to go to bed with the English? I wonder? I do not think so. As I have been so spoiled during the war. London awash with rude soldiery.
- You speak Russian? - I manage.

I should learn, simply for the sex.

Boys are quite thin on the ground here.

They can not speak my language,
I can not speak theirs.

so that when I contact one
soon I get bored.

Sex needs language.

Well, at least you found a friend.

I do not know whether I've found one.

or if I have chosen one.

And I... I know what I've done
to deserve him.

But what has he done to deserve me?

Am I a reward or a punishment?

He plays the balalaika and
I play the piano.

It's funny.

He is a ballet electrician.

Of course, he might be a policeman.

If you are a policeman
disguises it well.

Forster lived with a cop, did not he? Do you know him?

I'm afraid I'm a disappointment
in the friends department.

Oh, no matter.

You know,
nobody will believe me when I go home.

What did you do in Moscow, darling?

Nothing much.
I took measurements to Guy Burgess' inside the leg.

I would not think the inside of one's leg changes much, does it?

One of the things that does not change.

The knee is such a distance
from the main body,

while the groin,
as your honour knows,

is in the curtain of the place.

Come again?

Tristram Shandy.

Of course, you would not, right?

Do what?

Go around telling everyone.

My people here would not like that.

No?

No.

A hat would be nice.

7 and 5/8.
Now, I will write the name of my...

I have it here, and, oh,
and that of my cobbler, too.

Oh, it's an outfit.

Yes, for marriage
at gunpoint.

Look, how do you know he will not say no?

- Hmm?
- Your tailor.

It would be vulgar to say no.
He will not say no.

I will see what I can do.

Oh, you're not leaving already, are you?

You do not want to leave, right?

Well, could not we go somewhere?
You could show me the sights.

Uh... Well, I can not go out yet,
I have to wait for a telephone call

When calling the phone,
I am permitted to leave.

Who from?

Oh, you know, my people.

It's generally around four.

That's another two hours.

Never mind.
I'll put my Jack Buchanan record.

*# Who stole my heart away

# Who makes me dream all day

*# Dreams I know can never come true

*# Seems as though I'll ever be blue

*# Who, means my happiness

*# Who, would I answer yes to

*# To none other than you

*# No one, but you!

Good, isn't it?
Want to hear it again?

- You only have the one?
- only the one.

What's on the other side?

Oh, you do not want to listen to the other side.

The other side is rubbish. "I never hear the other side.

*# Who stole my heart away

What do you miss the most?

Well, um... Apart from Club Reform,
the streets of London

and occasionally
the English countryside

I think the only thing I really miss
are the gossip

Comrades, although they are
in any other respect,

do not gossip in the way we do it,

or on the same issues.

Well, pardon me for saying it, dear
but the comrades seem to me to be...

... a sad disappointment in every department.

No gossip
their clothes are terrible

can not make false teeth,
what else is there?

The system.

I thought, that being English,
we would be interested in that.

What do people say about me in England?

They do not say much anymore.

I thought you were
a little like Oscar Wilde.

No, no.

Although, he was a performer
and I was an performer.

Both vain.

But I never pretended.

If I wore a mask, it was to be exactly what I seemed.

And in relation to the other, well
I do not want to hide it

But my analysis of situations,

The reports that I had to send to the Foreign Office
were always Marxist.

openly so, impeccably so.

But nobody minded.

It is already known Guy, the old and dear Guy.
Quite safe. If you do not want to tune into something

You have to adapt to everything else

And in all important things
I did conform.

How can he be a spy?
My tailor says.

The average Englishman, you see, is not interested in ideas.

Say what you like about political theory. No-one will listen.

You could shove a whole slice
of the Communist manifesto

into the Queen's Speech.
Nobody would turn a hair.

Least of all, I suspect, HMQ.

Am I boring you?

It does not matter.

I'll think of 101 things to ask you
when you've gone.

How is Cyril Connolly?

You've asked me that.
I do not know.

So little, England.

Little music, little art.

Timid, tasteful, nice.

And I still love her.I love her.

You know, I can say I love London
and I can say that I love England.

I can't say I love my country.

I don't know what that means.

Do you watch cricket?

No.

Anyway, it has changed.

Cricket?

London.

Why? I do not want it to change.

Why does anybody want to change it?

It is none of your business to change it.
The fools!

I should stop them,
tie them together.

Listen, dear. I'm only an actress.

I am not a bright lady,
by your standards.

I have never been much interested in politics

But if this is Communism
I don't like it because it's dull!

The poor things look so tired.

Some people think Australia's dull.

And that is not Communism. And look at Leeds!

Only it occurs to me that
we have sat here all afternoon

pretending that spying,

which is what you did, darling,

it was just a minor social misdemeanor.

no worse – and I’m sure in
certain people’s minds much better –

than being caught in a public lavatory

the way gentlemen
in my profession constantly are,

and that it’s something one shouldn’t mention.

out of politeness.

So that we won't be embarrassed.

That's very English.

We will pretend it has not happened
because we are both sensible people.

Well,

I am not English, I am not sensible,

I am an Australian.

I can't muster much morality.

Outside Shakespeare, the word "treason" to me means nothing -

only you pissed in our soup, and we drank it.

Well, very well.

It does not affect me, darling.

I will order your suit and your hat

And I will upload it to my account.
To mine, not a word.

but for one reason,

I'm sorry for you

Now, in your book,

in your real book,

where you'll probably add my name
to the list of all the other fools you've conned

But you are not conning me, darling.

I know.

The pipe is not fooling pussy.

A shame. I was enjoying that.

You spoiled the lady's big speech.

I just want to be told why.

At the time, I thought
it was the right thing to do.

And solitude, I suppose.
- Oh, solitude!

If you have a secret, you are alone.

But you told people - you told several people.

There is no point in having a secret
if you make a secret of it

In fact, another thing that can bring me
is an old Eaton necktie

This one is in the last.

Ah, here is Tolya.

Oh, yes. Now, this is Mrs. Browne.

She is an actress from England.

How do you do?

- How do you do?
- Very good.

If you give him a cigarette,
an English cigarette.

he will be your friend for life.

Hmm.

Ah.

Oh, dear. I'm sorry.

No.

No, no, please.

Please.

He is a real Queen Mary.

I could not ask him for a suit too, right?

He would look so nice.

Anything. Anything.

Hello, Guy, Guy.

Uh... Tolya wants to play a song for you.

Uh, do let him, he will be so pleased.

Gilbert and Sullivan.

# Take a pair of sparkling eyes,

# Hidden, ever and anon,

# In a merciful eclipse

# Do not heed their mild surprise

# Having passed the Rubicon.

# Take a pair of rosy lips ;

What do you think? Reward or punishment?

# (Be particular in this) ;

# Take a tender little hand,

# Fringed with dainty fingerettes,

# Press it in parenthesis ;

Where are we going?

Church.

Do you like church? I adore it.

In this one, the songs are very good.

The opera singers are in the choir,
warming up for the evening performance

Is not that, uh, another friend?

Oh, good God no.

You know, when I first came here,

I was shadowed by a rather large
police.

That was when I was a celebrity.

Nowadays they just send me to those who are in training..

Irony, that.

Good afternoon.
(Russian) Good afternoon.

They are not strong in ironies, comrades.

Did you know Jack Buchanan?

Yes, I suppose.

We nearly got married.

It's strange.

Sybil Thorndik loved it.

I gave you my old mama's number, didn't I?

Yes.

I... do like it here.

Do not tell anyone I do not.

And thanks again, in advance.

Are you Mrs. Burguess?

My name is Coral Browne,

I just saw Guy in Moscow,
and asked me to call him.

- What does it look like? "Oh, he looks good."

I wish I could see you.

Old rogue.

Will not you go again?
I know you'd like to see him.

I do not think I can now
I got a stupid hip.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Well, maybe they will let him come back
sometime.

You should not be on the corner
for the rest of his life.

They are site years. People are silly.

Let me see? Come back.

Yeah, yeah, well, it's a little short on the left

We can easily alter that.

You have changed very little
over the years, you know.

Credit. Good.

And, if I wanted to try on the pants,
with which we had no problems,

And now there's this, which has a nondescript amount of work to make...

I will be with you in a moment! "That's fine, I think.

Yes, ma'am, can I help you?

Good morning.
I would like to order some suits

Certainly, ma'am, have a seat.

You have made suits
for this gentleman before

but now he lives abroad.

I see.

I took his measurements.

I do not know if they're quite right.

Let me see.

Oh, yes. Yes,
this is more than adequate.

Uh, could we know the gentleman's name?

Burgess.

I seem to remember that we had, uh...

We had two Mr. Burgesses.

This I take it as Mr.Burguess, G.

How is Mr Burgess?

Fatter, I see.

He was one of our more colorful customers.

Too little color in our drab lives these days

Mr Guy favoured this pattern.

It's a... It's a durable fabric.

Their costumes always suffered
enough punishment.

I hope, that you have been useful

Oh, yes, they have been.

I am glad to hear it.

Always getting scratches.Mr Guy.

And your name is?

Browne.

No discretion is needed here, ma'am

No, truly.

My apologies.

And this is the address?

We put little of ourselves
into our suits,

that is our loyalty.

And mum's the word.

Mum is always the word here, madam.

Moscow or Maidenhead,
mum is always the word.

Baldwin, Brooks...

Burgess...

Burgess, Burgess, Burgess,

Burgess.

No.

- I'll call back later.
- Burgess, Burgess, Burgess.

5807.

Well, if I wanted to follow the
bowels of the Earth.

We'll see what we can find.

5807...

This is Mr. Burguess
who got into hot water.

George!

Yes.

5807... 5807...

It's a graveyard.

On the contrary, ma'am,
they are all very much alive and indeed kicking

5807...

From time to time we make
a small bonfire.

George, 5807.

Ah, excuse me, sir.

Well, it is a very long way from him.

I thought I would never ask for others.

George is quite inconsiderate.

Here it is.

GB.

Great Britain.

I wish I had told her
in due time,

I would have liked to have seen the old thing again.

Well, he wanted me to take him to lunch.

- Oh! "Give me a check."

Oh!

I'm not sure I should
charge it.

Oh, for Guy.

Did you have a problem
to send the goods?

Oh, no, no, no.

No one moved a tab,
why should they?

Everything has been sent.

Only now she has written
asking for some pajamas

- Hmm? "Look."

- Goodbye, Mario.
- Goodbye, madam.

What I really need, really,
the only thing is pajamas.

Rations that can not sleep late,
in fact, are not made for that purpose.

What I would like are four pairs...

Oh!

fairly flat,
and of these two colors.

And finally my set will be complete.

and I should look like a real agent,
again.

What?

and I should look like a real gent
again

Oh.

Well, I think the pyjamas are going to be the end.

Otherwise
the little Dolly

will be betraying, betraying, betraying
until the cows come home.

Or until the revolution comes.

I'm afraid this gentleman does not have
already an account with us, ma'am

His account was closed. "I know, but he wants to open it again."

I'm afraid that's impossible.

Why?
- Well...

We send pajamas to the royal family.

So?

The gentleman is a traitor, Madame.

So? Must traitors sleep on a cloth?

Sorry. We have to trace the line
somewhere.

Well, why there?

Suppose someone commits
adultery in your precious pajamas

And I imagine it has occurred?

What happens when he orders
his next pair of jim-jams?

Is it sorry, no can do?

- I'm very sorry.
- She says the whole time she's sorry!

Oh, Jesus Christ!

You were quite happy to satisfy this man

when he was one of the most
notorious buggers in London!

And a drunk on offer.

Oh, yes. But then it was someone in the
Foreign Office.

A little red pipe on the sleeve,
Mr Burguess?.Of course.

A discreet initials in the pocket,
Mr Burguess?.Oh, yes, certainly.

And if there's anything else you need,
Mr Burgess,

We would be very happy to lower your pants
striped

and make them!

But not anymore.

Look, ma'am, I do not know why
is doing this for him.

But as far as we are concerned,

Mr Burgess is a client
with whom we have finished.

Ours is a respectable firm..

Highly respectable!

It’s pricks like you that
make me understand why he went!

Thank God I'm not English!

In fact, lady, our signature
is not English either, in origin

Oh? What nationality is it?

Hungarian.

I see.

Well, you can not resist buying an old Eaton tie.

Cash, of course.

It is for the mother of the Archbishop
of Canterbury

# That he is an Englishman!

*# That he is an Englishman!

*# For he might have been a Roosian,

*#A French, or Turk, or Proosian,

*# Or perhaps Itali-an!

*# But in spite of all temptations

*# to belong to other nations,

*# He remains an Englishman!

*# He remains an Englishman!

*# For in spite of all temptations

*# to belong to other nations,

*# He remains an Englishman!

*# For he himself has said it,

*# And it's greatly to his credit,

*# That he is an Englishman!

*# That he is an Englishman!